speckles said:
ok let me try to answer questions... First of all normally when i really don't like it it is becuase I have "submitted". I'm usually totally not horny for anykind of sex and so it makes it impossible for me to get into it. When i like it it is the oppoisite I am horny and it makes it much more exciting..which is why i have hope that one day i could like it more. He also likes it both ways, me tickle him and him tickle me. For me when i am not in the mood i would rather do the tickling b/c generally i just get frustrated if I'm not in the mood and he is tickling me. I'm amazing that ya'll like that feeling of torture...It just drives me insane when I'm not in the right mood, maybe i'm just a control freak so that is also why i like doing it to him better. Does this help? I think I answered all the questions and thank you already because you guys have been so nice!!
Thanks for answering the questions... Hopefully we can help more as a result... There's different ways to submit, and so, I'm not sure exactly how you mean "submitted" in quotes, but allow me to speculate a bit and maybe go out on a limb...
Might it be that in his drive and zealousness to tickle you he sometimes does so out of the blue? Noting that you're "usually totally not horny", the tickling is more of an annoyance and I'm sure when you're not in the mood it gets overwhelming -- hence your negative feeling of having "submitted"... Am I on the right track?
Now, when you're in the mood for sex, you're more open for more kinds of physical stimulation, and can find tickling enjoyable...
If I'm right about the above, my assessment from what I understand of your situation is likely that this is more of a typical man/woman issue than a tickling fetishist/non-fetishist issue. Guys can be in the mood for sex lickety-split, whereas many women take longer to "warm up"... This may be part of the issue -- he's in the mood, and tickling, being his fetish, is part of his sexual repertoire that always comes out, or does so frequently... Not taking into account your need to warm up for play (or possibly, even getting a bit of a kick out of your being more resistant -- sorry, the boy's only a fallible human, and that can be part of the turn-on for some as well -- I don't know him), he jumps into his sexual repertoire, and it annoys the crap out of you. It's a common sex issue -- he wants it more often, she wants it less...
Perhaps, you could teach him a bit about how to best seduce you... How to take the time and have the patience to gradually turn you on, rather than suddenly going full blast into what for him, is foreplay... Teach him the foreplay techniques that delight you, and get you in the mood to the point whereafter his acting on his tickling fetish would be more welcome.
Now, what follows is only theory, but it seems reasonable enough to me... As he continues to use what he knows to turn you on before engaging in tickling, the frequency with which you'll be able to process it as a pleasurable and welcome sensation will increase. Continued association of tickling with pleasure over time may enable your mind to be conditioned to view it as pleasurable itself, such that less and less of your currrently accustomed style of foreplay is required for you to see tickling as a turn-on (this is not to invalidate what turns you on at all, and you'll never lose those other things that turn you on innately), and in time, with enough pairing of tickling with sexually pleasurable stimuli (slowly, patiently and when you're in the mood), tickling itself may turn you on, acting as a mental cue for: "Hey! You know what comes after this!" (Hopefully, you!
😉 )
The bottom line? (And correct me if you think I'm wrong here, ladies of the forum...) Like most things in a relationship, you can't just fix this on your own. You can't just start liking it more, however much your willingness demonstrates you'd like to. He has to be involved and working to bridge the gap of tickling and pleasure with you, and he's going to have to be deliberate and patient in doing so, because it's not just a once and done thing.
This is a strict behaviorist approach presented, and there may be other factors at play that need to be addressed... Steph mentioned the possibility of a bad past experience, intimacy issues, and whatnot... There is often a mental component to these things, also, so don't neglect that... If something comes to mind that would actually prohibit you mentally from enjoying tickling, it may be useful to attend to it. But seeing as how you seem able to enjoy it under certain conditions, I don't think you have a serious obstacle, but something that could be worked on bit by bit, even if you are a control freak... Over time, you can learn that giving up control (even with tickling) to someone you trust can be very liberating and enjoyable.
Also, don't be afraid to tickle him back... Maybe get some tips from 'lers around here to tickle him into submission instead?
😀 In any event, mutual tickling is great cardio, gets the blood pumping, and again, can get you more physically stimulated, and paired with the _right_ stimulation, can get you in the mood, leading you in the same direction again...
A large part of this is speculation from what I interpreted from your response, and at the moment, I'm massively sleep-deprived... So, if I'm way off base, tell me how, and I'll try again after I've gotten some rest.
I'm not quite as much of an exib as Skippy might be implying he is... 
: It's time for me to keep quiet! *nodsnods*
