Relationship Tickling, NEED ADVICE!

[Cocomo14]

Hi everyone! Ok, so after keeping this secret to myself my whole life, I finally decided to tell my boyfriend about my fetish. Surprisingly, he was very supportive. But now, we never have sex because I feel like he is just tickling me because he knows I like it. He wants to have sex, but I just say no every time because I am insecure about this fetish. It is so weird to explain. I feel insecure about it all now and I just don't like accepting that tickling turns me on. I only accept it when I am by myself. He has quickly gotten into the fetish and gets turned on when I tickle his feet. What do I do? Do I just need to accept this? I get so embaressed. Has anyone else gone through this before? Any advice would help. THANKS!

 

[TicklesXXX]

Have sex, after the first, or the second session, after discovering that everything was delicious, you will forget that irrational fear.

 

[mntickler]

I would say the hard part is over. I never told any about my fetish until a month ago with my current girlfriend. And she didnt like tickling one bit when we met and now she has become a little fan her self. We have continued to go further into this fetish together a little more, but i think it started like you said, she wanted to make me happy. But now i think she is beginning to like it for her self. I think it just opened up her mind to new ideas that she never would have thought of without me in her life. So I would say just continue to be honest with him and dont over think it. You gotten the difficult part done now just have fun and he will enjoy it in time. Good luck though.

 

[Darth Sidious]

I'd say do your best to get over it and just appreciate that you are able to share your fetish with your significant other. Clearly he likes it too, so why fret about it? Embrace it 🙂.

 

[Jagermeistered]

Are you afraid of getting pregnant?

 

[Flatfoot]

It sounds like you don't like it being exploited--as if he's using it as a "button" to turn you on. Does that sound right?

 

[WorkInProgress]

If you have a genuinely serious, promising relationship, then it sounds to me as if sexual intimacy is something you'll need to work on together. It's probably a matter of deep-seated psychological discomforts and anxieties that go beyond what your attitude is about either tickling or sex. In any case, though, it's part of the larger dynamic of the relationship that you and he should help each other work through.

 

[ElFewja]

But if he's tickling you because he knows you like it, that's a good thing? I guess you're still a bit shy about it.

I'm not sure about the situation but I wonder how well he's tickling you? Like, if he was tickling you into hysteria or just light/playfully or whatever, or eroticly I guess. Mostly I could just see those situations making a difference as to how you feel afterwards.

So, targeted questions: have you had sex (with him) before, have you tried just going for vanilla sex without tickling, do you set your sessions up with the intent (or his intent) of having sex after the tickling?

It was posited elsewhere but I would also like to throw it in there: if you haven't, I would suggest just giving vanilla sex a shot since, from your post, the issue seems to be directly related to tickling. Assuming you haven't before that might break the barrier or make it easier for you to transition to sex from tickling since you've done both before, you know?

You also said that tickling turns you on but is there any reason that tickling has to be tied alongside sex for you? It could just be a fun thing you guys do without it having to go into sex all the time or any time.

Anyway, best of luck.

 

[FFT32]

Honestly Courtney, you and you bf have already jumped over the hurdle. All you have to do now is keep running. You were not secure and shy prior to sharing your fetish with him. Now that you have and the results sound positive by the way you have described them, you stopped to reflect and your insecurity and shyness came back.

Keep Running! lol