Suicide: What are your thoughts?

[CurtWild]

this me a bit harsh but....

i think it is a chicken shit thing to do

 

[MrMacphisto]

And you can rest assured, I wouldn't even talk with you about it. It is up to that person. Want to kill yourself? Go right ahead. I just shared my personal thoughts on the matter. I wouldn't expect them to change anyones perspective, nor would I want them to, quite frankly.

Sorry if I came off as confrontational, but I suppose I misinterpreted your post as reflecting a legislative point of view. If I understand you correctly, you believe suicide should be legal, but you don't personally think it should be done.

 

[PainTrain]

Sorry if I came off as confrontational, but I suppose I misinterpreted your post as reflecting a legislative point of view. If I understand you correctly, you believe suicide should be legal, but you don't personally think it should be done.

You got me. It's a choice. The wrong choice, in my opinion, but still a choice. My earlier remarks were not intended to sound "legislative" if you will... It's just my personal opinion that we have all been given one life to live... and it's our obligation to live it the best we can... Because we all have blood on our hands.

 

[MrMacphisto]

You got me. It's a choice. The wrong choice, in my opinion, but still a choice. My earlier remarks were not intended to sound "legislative" if you will... It's just my personal opinion that we have all been given one life to live... and it's our obligation to live it the best we can... Because we all have blood on our hands.

I agree, but I don't follow you on the "blood on our hands" part. What do you mean by that? I haven't killed anyone. Unless of course, you're suggesting that we're all flawed -- which I would certainly agree with...

 

[PainTrain]

I agree, but I don't follow you on the "blood on our hands" part. What do you mean by that? I haven't killed anyone. Unless of course, you're suggesting that we're all flawed -- which I would certainly agree with...

Flawed is an excellent way of putting it.

 

[Sultrybrunette]

I tell you what. I have been in that position. I attempted suicide. To all of you that consider it "chicken shit" "coward" and what ever else you called it try standing in my shoes and then feel free to judge. Not one person here knows the pain I was in at the time. Not one person can sit there and understand what goes through a person's mind when they decide to do it. It is so damn easy for you all that have never been through that kind of pain, to have those kind of thoughts, to sit there and judge what is right and what is wrong. It maybe selfish but when you get to that point it doesnt matter anymore. Ya I could take meds...if I could afford it. And I could get "professional help" ...if I could afford it. But I cant. So I struggle with this every day. On my own. Is it worth the struggle? Sometimes yes, but most of the time no. Am I glad it didnt work? Sometimes yes and sometimes no. I personally feel that if a person has come to that point, than that is their perogative. Evidentally, all the so called friends and family members didnt pay attention to the signs and give them the support they needed in the first place. So then let them deal with it afterwards. As for someone who is terminally ill, I completely support it. I have had various family members who I watched die a terrible death and suffered greatly. We have no problem of putting our favorite family pet down because we dont want to see them suffer anymore but yet we cant give the same curtesy to a human? I don't get it.

 

[some1somewhere]

I've held a gun to my temple, and I really don't know why.

As for suicide, I can not condemn some for it personally. emotionally I have been there. I woke up every morning wanting to die, but I didn't. In battling depression, I think that it is hard for those that don't to understand. FOr years, I believed that regardless of my life that I condemned to a worthless life, one without purpose or value. I hid it, and learned that the lonelist people are those in the crowd "too careful not to upset the glass they are holding." I think that I spent years in a depression. Until you feel the condemnation of one's conscience it is hard to understand. You physically feel pain. You feel sick. That said, I am not going to condemn them, but I wont excuse them either.

Suicide is only painless to those who have no feelings. It affects everyone. Anyone who knows anyone that knows you will be affected. For the rest of their life people will be wondering, if I did that, or this, would it have happenned.

Often we do not see our stengths until they become our weaknesses. It sounds like a contradiction, but it is true.

To those that are thinking of it, I have a few words. One you have value. Your value is dependent on anyone, not even yourself. You have a lot of value just because you exist. Second, you do not find peace by ceasing to exist. This is a religiously neutral statement. If you do not believe in an afterlife, you can not find freedom from pain if you die. Thirdly, Fear is nor always bad. It is natural and helps to keep us safe. And lastly, remember five years ago. A lot of things where silly then, weren't they. They things we worried about we don't any more. Five years from now will be the same. We wont worry about those things any more. That girl, that guy, that job etc, will not by so important. You have to trust that time may not heal all wounds, but it allows us to travel past them and continue till we can stand up and say that we are hopeful and alive, will continue to be that way.

Anyone can pm me if that hurt or have been in those places where no one esle understands, as I have been there myself.

 

[steph]

great question!

Raised in an Italian Roman Catholic household, I was taught suicide is gutless and chicken shit and I'd go to hell.

As a medical professional, I face suicidal patients all the time (both successful and failed attempts.)

As one who's struggled with my own psych issues especially as a teen, I can say with 100% conviction the pain these people face is as real as the sky is blue to you. That said, I've carried an DNR in my wallet since I was 17. Bottom line? I don't know and I'm not sure I really want to. I figure God will decide for me.
XOXO

 

[DannyMc]

Suicide take's away the chance of being happy again . One needs to give whatever the problem is time to be worked out . Also all the people that will be hurt by it . Suicide is not an option but taking hold of your feeling's and putting them back in place no matter how long it may take . One's own life is worth saving .

 

[Sultrybrunette]

Suicide take's away the chance of being happy again . One needs to give whatever the problem is time to be worked out . Also all the people that will be hurt by it . Suicide is not an option but taking hold of your feeling's and putting them back in place no matter how long it may take . One's own life is worth saving .

So basically your saying that the feelings of the individual that is contemplating suicide doesnt matter, as long as they dont hurt someone else? I have waited 47 years to be truly happy for the first time. How much longer do I need to wait? Sometimes the circumstances of one's life makes it such that they can never truly be happy. Why should they continue suffering waiting for something that is illusional? The "pie in the sky" dream isnt there and there is no such thing as miracles. All they are doing is making everyone around them miserable because of their feelings. Once again, there is no understanding. Here is a bandaid to make it all better. Well when they get to that point there isnt a bandaid big enough.

 

[Deadsea7777]

Well, I am a gambler, as long as I have a chip to gamble in the roulette of life I will keep gambling.
The rational fact is that death is irreversible, once you are dead, that's it. Life can change all the time for good or bad.
As long as there are women in the word, there is hope for life.....well if women go extinct there I settle for an Astor Martin.

Sultry, your two sons are not the light of your days?, I wish I had sons or dauthers. Or money to adopt one at least.
And Sultry did you like my story, even if it sucks (which it seems to), you can tell me I will love your comment.

 

[Sultrybrunette]

Sultry, your two sons are not the light of your days?, I wish I had sons or dauthers. Or money to adopt one at least.
And Sultry did you like my story, even if it sucks (which it seems to), you can tell me I will love your comment.

Some days my sons are. I love them dearly but they are beginning their teen years. I had to call the cops on my 14 yr old this weekend. Trust me, the good moments are not as many right now. Ummm nice plug on your story. I will check it out.

 

[Deadsea7777]

Some days my sons are. I love them dearly but they are beginning their teen years. I had to call the cops on my 14 yr old this weekend. Trust me, the good moments are not as many right now. Ummm nice plug on your story. I will check it out.

Well ... two sons on your own could be a tough ride, I wish I could give you some advice but I do not know, and for a shoulder to cry I am in another continent, only the net. Adolescence is difficult for parents, and I suppose worst for single parents. I wish you will find a way to bring your sons to adulthood, and in balance be proud of your job with them.....however nobody is perfect so do not be too hard on yourself.

Sorry about the plug....if the mountain does not go to Mahoma...Mahoma goes to the mountain.

 

[Goodieluver]

suicide is a sign of weakness and a selfish coward way to go. Hell if u wanna die, join the army and become a suicide bomber, do something worth your life rather than inhaling paint thinner or slicing yourself. Be of some benefit to society

My .02

 

[DannyMc]

Sultrybrunette , I'm sorry that you didn't like what my post said . I had the persons feelings in mind . To me things can get better , but suicide takes away that chance . When a person is thinking of suicide they need to keep in mind the one's that love them and how much sorrow they will feel . I can't see a one of those loved one's wanting a person to go through with suicide . If they have children that's the one feeling most of all to give them a reason to keep living .

 

[aun_existe_amor]

Some people have a lot of life learning to do!!!

Depression and suicidal tendencies/ thoughts are part of an illness. It's not a lifestyle choice. It's not chicken shit or cowardly. One day you might feel so bad that the only way you think you can feel better is to die. You won't appreciate someone calling you chicken shit or cowardly then. Whether you have a good family and good friends or your own children makes no difference either. Just because you have your own children doesn't mean that you will never become physically ill and you don't expect that, but it also doesn't mean that you won't become mentally unwell either. Mental illnesses are just as bad as physical illnesses it's just that they are less understood and there is nothing to see. You don't know how you will feel or what you will do when you are in a desperate place........ which happens to most of us at some point in our lives. It doesn't matter whether you are a Christian or which God you believe in or what your morals are, it could be you one day. Let's hope you come accross someone more sympathetic in your time of need and have no one calling you chicken shit or a coward.

 

[Sultrybrunette]

suicide is a sign of weakness and a selfish coward way to go. Hell if u wanna die, join the army and become a suicide bomber, do something worth your life rather than inhaling paint thinner or slicing yourself. Be of some benefit to society

My .02

Wow, thanks for understanding Goodieluver.

Danny, of course things get better for you. They always get better for the people that are "ok". The lucky people that have a wonderful life and everything is roses. What I am trying to make you see is that that is not always the case. That there are two sides and maybe there should be more understanding about their thoughts and feelings.

Aun - Thank you hon. Hugs you tight. Its nice to know there is someone that understands and I know you do.

 

[DannyMc]

I feel I've struck out twice now , I haven't tried to misunderstand anyone or knock anybody down , Ive just tried to give some supportive thoughts . It's true you can never really know what a person's going through until you've gone though it yourself . In the work I do , people do commit suicide and succeed and I always wonder why and never fully understand the answer . I really wish I had all the answers to help but I don't , I can only offer as much as i can .

 

[isabeau]

Some people have a lot of life learning to do!!!

Depression and suicidal tendencies/ thoughts are part of an illness. It's not a lifestyle choice. It's not chicken shit or cowardly. One day you might feel so bad that the only way you think you can feel better is to die. You won't appreciate someone calling you chicken shit or cowardly then. Whether you have a good family and good friends or your own children makes no difference either. Just because you have your own children doesn't mean that you will never become physically ill and you don't expect that, but it also doesn't mean that you won't become mentally unwell either. Mental illnesses are just as bad as physical illnesses it's just that they are less understood and there is nothing to see. You don't know how you will feel or what you will do when you are in a desperate place........ which happens to most of us at some point in our lives. It doesn't matter whether you are a Christian or which God you believe in or what your morals are, it could be you one day. Let's hope you come accross someone more sympathetic in your time of need and have no one calling you chicken shit or a coward.

i was staying out of this thread but i am in agreement with aun on this one..my mother basically chose to end her life by not eating and refusing her shock treatments..is she a coward? or was she? she wasn't in her right mind.. she was in mental pain for most of her adult life..suffered delusions which she masked with meds and alcohol for years until it caught up with her.. yes mom basically committed suicide i suppose..she didn't do anything physically to end her life.. she just shut down, and refused to eat or take meds or continue her shock treatments.. i think mom realized she would need those treatments until she died, and she had had enough..coward? i think not...tired of the delusions? yes and wanted to end that forever.. i know now that she is finally delusion free..and well at last.

 

[ShadowTklr]

suicide is a sign of weakness and a selfish coward way to go. Hell if u wanna die, join the army and become a suicide bomber, do something worth your life rather than inhaling paint thinner or slicing yourself. Be of some benefit to society

My .02

Okay, this is about as insensitive as one can get. I assume you're joking, but you are saying what many people feel. Some people actually believe what you wrote because they are detached from an ability to show compassion. We call them Sociopaths.

Just because a person can dismiss the very real pain felt by another human being without consideration or appreciation for their struggle, doesn't make them stronger. In fact, I would suggest that the strength of character for such a person is significantly lower than that of the person who wishes to end his or her own life.

Is suicide a sign of weakness? Of course suicide is a sign of weakness. It is the ultimate sign. When the stress of intolerable emotional pain sucks the strength right out of you, THAT's weakness. And, for many people, there are others around who love and support them - who lend THEIR strength to help others shoulder the burden of so much pain. For others, even THAT is not enough to ebb the waves of hurt. There is a constant sense of loss - a sense that no one truly cares about you or what you have to contribute to this life.

For most, suicide isn't about weak character, or selfishness, or cowardliness. When these words are used, it is because the person using them has no better way to describe what he or she cannot fathom within their own mind.

Suicide is about despair, and despair is a cataclysmic epiphany. It is the clearest possible view of one’s perceived insignificance in this world. The only way I can aptly define despair is to imagine what it would be like to feel as though you are completely and utterly alone in life - to look at your own mortality and imagine no possibilities for happiness; to imagine that the rest of your life will be exactly the same as it is at the very moment of your lowest emotional point, and that you are condemned to repeat it everyday. THAT is despair, and for the suicidal person, it is an unobstructed view of their reality – a reality from which there is no escape in life; only death.

After college, I volunteered at a suicide hotline. I talked to people for hours about the things that caused them to feel so helpless and hopeless. Although I never met them in person, I always felt as though I was able to help them by recalibrating their perspective so that they could see what I see in life. But to do that, I first have to be able to see what they see. Calling them selfish and cowardly is giving them one more excuse to exit this life with the confirmation that no one really cares.

 

[ShadowTklr]

So basically your saying that the feelings of the individual that is contemplating suicide doesnt matter, as long as they dont hurt someone else? I have waited 47 years to be truly happy for the first time. How much longer do I need to wait? Sometimes the circumstances of one's life makes it such that they can never truly be happy. Why should they continue suffering waiting for something that is illusional? The "pie in the sky" dream isnt there and there is no such thing as miracles. All they are doing is making everyone around them miserable because of their feelings. Once again, there is no understanding. Here is a bandaid to make it all better. Well when they get to that point there isnt a bandaid big enough.

Hi Sultry. Believe it or not, those feelings can attack people whom you would think are in the middle of their own fairytale. It's not always circumstances that get you in depression, and its not always circumstances that get you out.

If you ever want to talk, I hope you'll find me. It's not easy staying strong in a vacuum.

 

[goddess_nemesis]

I tell you what. I have been in that position. I attempted suicide. To all of you that consider it "chicken shit" "coward" and what ever else you called it try standing in my shoes and then feel free to judge. Not one person here knows the pain I was in at the time. Not one person can sit there and understand what goes through a person's mind when they decide to do it. It is so damn easy for you all that have never been through that kind of pain, to have those kind of thoughts, to sit there and judge what is right and what is wrong. It maybe selfish but when you get to that point it doesnt matter anymore. Ya I could take meds...if I could afford it. And I could get "professional help" ...if I could afford it. But I cant. So I struggle with this every day. On my own. Is it worth the struggle? Sometimes yes, but most of the time no. Am I glad it didnt work? Sometimes yes and sometimes no. I personally feel that if a person has come to that point, than that is their perogative. Evidentally, all the so called friends and family members didnt pay attention to the signs and give them the support they needed in the first place. So then let them deal with it afterwards. As for someone who is terminally ill, I completely support it. I have had various family members who I watched die a terrible death and suffered greatly. We have no problem of putting our favorite family pet down because we dont want to see them suffer anymore but yet we cant give the same curtesy to a human? I don't get it.

Sultry, I'm glad you didn't succeed in your attempt at suicide, because from what I know seeing you on TMF and how wonderful and nice you are, it would be a shame to see someone so wonderful take their own life.

It has to be tough when a person's suffering from depression or get to the point when it's not worth it to live anymore. But I do wish they would at least find someone to unleash burden to, someone who will help them.

I know of two people who committed suicide. 'K' took his own life when he was a freshman in high school (I was an 8th grader at the time). Everyone was shocked. There hadn't been the leastest indication that he was suffering at all. If maybe someone knew, they could've helped him.

The second person, 'M' took his own life just days after my graduation (he had graduated a year ahead of me). Again, we were all shocked. He had an uncle who had committed suicide and 'M' had attempted once before but failed. But we had no idea that he was suffering from any kind of emotional pain. He was engaged to be married, his own sister was set to get married that summer, he loved his nephews.

The devastation those two brought to their families, it was terrible. Maybe if they had some kind of indication, something to say that they weren't all right. But no one knew, it makes it that much harder for the families and friends they left behind.

I know some who are suicidial show signs or alert someone to how low they are feeling. Sometimes they get help. Or if they go through with it, you know that they were in pain. But it is so much harder when a person commits suicide today, but yesterday they were their usual self. 'K' and 'M' were naturally happy people, had lots of friends, their families loved them.

I know some people don't really understand the pain suicidial people feel, but sometimes I wonder if they understand the pain they'd be causing their loved ones.

I won't say where I stand, but from the devastation I've seen of those two families, I would seem downright coldhearted.

 

[BellaRisa]

I take issue with those who consider suicide a cowardly or selfish act. I see where you're coming from, but having spoken with people who've had suicidal plans at one time I know it's *far* from selfish or craven. For one thing, no one knows exactly what happens after you die-no one's come back to tell us with any real believability. In an admittedly weird way it can be seen as pretty brave to risk the whole fire-and-brimstone-agonizing-torture-for-eternity type afterlife that so many religions promise suicidal folks. Those I've spoken to honestly felt that such a future was better than the burden they were on their families-they'd rather have loved ones mourn for awhile, then move on to a happier life without them. I can understand that, the feeling that they would be truly better off without you both emotionally and financially. That's twisted, but it's not selfish and certainly not weak. Heck, I can barely enter a dark room in my own house, I damn sure ain't trying to see what Hell is like if it exists (and with my luck it SO does) and I'd wager most people here would be too "chickenshit" to roll those dice. I am **not** saying that suicide is the answer for any problem, but there's more to it than people think for those who see it as a valid option.

Bella

 

[Goodieluver]

I take issue with those who consider suicide a cowardly or selfish act. I see where you're coming from, but having spoken with people who've had suicidal plans at one time I know it's *far* from selfish or craven. For one thing, no one knows exactly what happens after you die-no one's come back to tell us with any real believability. In an admittedly weird way it can be seen as pretty brave to risk the whole fire-and-brimstone-agonizing-torture-for-eternity type afterlife that so many religions promise suicidal folks. Those I've spoken to honestly felt that such a future was better than the burden they were on their families-they'd rather have loved ones mourn for awhile, then move on to a happier life without them. I can understand that, the feeling that they would be truly better off without you both emotionally and financially. That's twisted, but it's not selfish and certainly not weak. Heck, I can barely enter a dark room in my own house, I damn sure ain't trying to see what Hell is like if it exists (and with my luck it SO does) and I'd wager most people here would be too "chickenshit" to roll those dice. I am **not** saying that suicide is the answer for any problem, but there's more to it than people think for those who see it as a valid option.

Bella

It was a concept i contimplated once in my life, fortunately im a coward and didnt go thru with it. Here is my reasoning, you are removing yourself from the loved ones u do have, regardless of how abandoned u are, there are people who care for you, u will not have a vacant nameless funeral, so right away you are putting yourself first saying "woe is me, life is pain, im gonna off myself" and all the burdens you had in life, be it financial or other is then passed on to your living relatives, making the burden even more. As i said, if u are sucidal, join some armed forces and make your death mean something.

 

[aun_existe_amor]

It was a concept i contimplated once in my life, fortunately im a coward and didnt go thru with it. Here is my reasoning, you are removing yourself from the loved ones u do have, regardless of how abandoned u are, there are people who care for you, u will not have a vacant nameless funeral, so right away you are putting yourself first saying "woe is me, life is pain, im gonna off myself" and all the burdens you had in life, be it financial or other is then passed on to your living relatives, making the burden even more. As i said, if u are sucidal, join some armed forces and make your death mean something.

As I said in my first post on this thread.......

Not everyone has someone to turn to for help and not everyone has someone they leave behind. You are obviously very lucky.