Tickling and BDSM?

[Straps&Laughter]

For you, is tickling a subset of BDSM, or a wholly separate thing?

I came to tickling first – as someone who has had a fetish for it since my earliest sexual awareness, I was tickling (or thinking about tickling) viable partners before I ever heard terms like Dominance, submission, or sadomasochism.

When I did, and discovered those were other core parts of my sexuality (late teens, early 20s), they became fused for me. I always assumed they did for others, too.

That said, I interact with a lot of people from the tickling community who either have no concept of, or no respect for, the greater BDSM culture. Things like negotiations, the meaning of a collar, the nature of poly relationships, etc., often seem foreign to a large part of our community.

[Without knowing me, for the sake of discussion that this isn't a thread for whining or expressing frustration, but rather a genuine curiosity.]

Where do you fall on the Venn diagram of tickling and BDSM?

 

[rdhd]

To me, they're separate. You don't have to do bondange, although the ler may be considered to be dominant, and the lee may think the experience as S/M. As you kinda suggest, true BDSM goes into some heavier things, and as far as I know, tickling isn't really part of that world. I could be wrong.

 

[solarcharger]

Personally, I prefer it with some form of bondage, but can also enjoy tickling my wife’s feet without her being tied up all the time.

 

[librarian]

chicken and egg

 

[Oldnewguy]

I’ve had sessions with both tickling and BDSM. My ‘lee enjoys both forms of play and I aim to please ��

 

[3xPIN]

Separate, but they go hand in hand. In the same way pizza and soda are totally different but when put together they just seem meant for each other.

 

[Myriads]

It's actually both at once.

Paraphilia nest inside each other. So they are distinct unique things unto themselves, while also being contained in greater ones they are within.

I'll use my own personal likes as an example.

My core paraphilia is called "Response Control" it's the enjoyment of causing and seeing responses in a partner.

Response Control is under the BDSM umbrella, it's one of many things that nest within the very broad BDSM category. In this case under the SM part more specifically.

Within Response Control I have two specific favorites, Tickling, and Forced Orgasms. Both are utterly distinct groups in themselves which I can find fun in, but they also both feed up into the Response Control group and I get other pleasures there. In turn THAT feads up to BDSM and other positives come from there.

It's an additive hierarchy where each unit is distinct, but also totally bound into a greater whole that functions as a unit. Where the enjoyment, and how much comes from each unit is unique to the individual, and it's not unusual for the greatest amusement to arise from the lowest elements, so what a lot of the posters above say tracks.

You'll note that groups always tend to be collections of others. For example BDSM is Bondage, Sadism, Masochism, and the Psychological aspects of all three properly. Then each of these groups breaks down multiple ways.

Also a group can have multiple 'parents' in different groups above it. Tickling for example falls under Sadism, Masochism, Sensulism, and several other minor ones. It's a complicated maze.

This was a great question from the OP

Myriads

 

[Soles_Scream]

My tickle fetish, much like the tickling content I sell, is 99% unrestrained. I respect Bondage and BDSM, but it does not move the needle as much for me compared to the fun and innocence of tickle play rather than torture. Yes, I know tickle torture can be consensual, but power dynamic means nothing to me.

 

[robmic]

My tickle fetish, much like the tickling content I sell, is 99% unrestrained. I respect Bondage and BDSM, but it does not move the needle as much for me compared to the fun and innocence of tickle play rather than torture. Yes, I know tickle torture can be consensual, but power dynamic means nothing to me.

For me, if someone can be tickled without being bound, they're just not ticklish enough for me my taste. I love it when they are bound and are begging before I even start!

 

[GorillaTickler]

Separate for me. In fact, I love unrestrained tickling where the tickler can use strength to dominate the lee and the lee is able to kick, fight and struggle to no avail. I'm fine with bondage, it does make life easier for ticklers. But it's the tickling that does it for me.

 

[Soles_Scream]

For me, if someone can be tickled without being bound, they're just not ticklish enough for me my taste. I love it when they are bound and are begging before I even start!

I respect that

I’d add that the tickler’s style has a lot to do with the reaction as well.

 

[Littlechambers]

Straight from wiki “ Bondage, in the BDSM subculture, is the practice of consensually tying, binding, or restraining a partner for erotic, aesthetic, or somatosensory stimulation. A partner may be physically restrained in a variety of ways, including the use of rope, cuffs, bondage tape, or self-adhering bandage”

And “ BDSM is a variety of often erotic practices or roleplaying involving bondage, discipline, dominance and submission, sadomasochism, and other related interpersonal dynamics. Given the wide range of practices, some of which may be engaged in by people who do not consider themselves to be practising BDSM, inclusion in the BDSM community or subculture often is said to depend on self-identification and shared experience”

Based on this - I would say it’s fair to count it as BDSM, but if you don’t want to… you can argue it’s not and no one can really be right or wrong in that. If it doesn’t feel like a BDSM thing for you, then it doesn’t have to be.

I will say that, its BDSM for me personally. But I suppose it depends how you approach the activity as well.

 

[torturoustickle]

I joined the BDSM community in my city, in hope of finding/gaining some tickling experiences. Fair to say I learned a lot about myself, and the fetish that I love. To me they do go hand in hand, and I combine tickling with multiple other things now. It's a wonderful journey of exploration and experimentation.

 

[TickleYeti]

BDSM is honestly such a broad category that almost every fetish has an intersection if not outright falling under the grouping.

You have people self describing and being described as tickle sadists and there is absolutely an element to that for many tickles, honestly anyone with Lee tendencies like me could be described as having a masochistic tendency, tickling may not be 'pain' but it's such an unpleasant experience for so many in the mainstream world that in their eyes it's no different and in some ways they'd be right. We absolutely adore being tickled like some subs adore impact play, electrostim, needleplay, etc if you don't limit masochism to willingly subjecting oneself and allowing oneself to be subjected to pain and instead open it up to be any sensation that mainstream defines as something to avoid.

Of course, that does raise the troubling question on just how dependent fetish definitions are on mainstream perspectives but I think that we are intentionally owning the labels society would put on us as a sort of retaliation to the implied and attempted negative connotation that comes from the roots. I mean, fetishism originates as studies in deviance and alongside mental disorders in older versions of the DSM in psychology so there are a lot of lingering traces of that antiquated attitude... I'm going down a rabbit hole here haha

In short, tickling absolutely falls under bdsm and though it may seem to be a softer form of it, I've known many hardcore masochist who laugh at a basic flogger and need canes and needles and such to really get into it, who also place tickling as a hard limit. It's got a playful connotation but in many ways it scares even the toughest subs haha

Though for me, it seems tickling wraps up under sensory play the most naturally.

 

[TickleYeti]

All of the above 'imo' of course! Grains of salt freely available to be taken with consumption of above post haha

 

[milagros317]

To me, tickling is definitely a subset of BDSM. It is part of the power exchange to allow oneself to be tied up and tickled.