Armpit_licker
TMF Master
- Joined
- Aug 30, 2004
- Messages
- 989
- Points
- 0
This movie with Tom Hanks was not bad, but awful. The flaws had flaws. Absolute garbage. I hated every character, and it was supposed to be funny. Not funny, not clever, and no suspense. Pointless.
SPOILER ALERT!!!!
Basically while the Hanks character's plane is in the air, the foreign government in his country is overthrown. The United States doesn't recognize his new government, so Hanks can't fly back -- or enter the United States. So.....he has to live in the terminal -- unable to speak English. .....and the airport in New York City (Kennedy) doesn't even have an interpreter, so your not sure that the Hanks character (who talks like a bad Latka from Taxi) even understands what just happened once he lands. In fact, after about fifteen minutes you wish he hadn't.
The whole movie boils down to the Hanks character having to leave the airport in NYC to get the one last jazz performer's signature (from a photo of about twenty), so he could put it in a coffee can for his late father. That one last jazz performer plays the Ramada Inn every night, and the Hanks character (who can't decide whether he's goofy, retarded, or sharp enough to wear a Hugo Boss suit and sweep Catherine Zeta-Jones off her feet) could have easily had one of the maintenance staff pick it up three months earlier. In fact, at one point the Hanks character has a bad limp for no apparent reason.
Plus, the head of security (a short bald guy) has a mad-on for the Hanks character for no particular reason. The poor soul (Hanks) is stuck in the airport (through no fault -- at all -- of his own) and the top guy hates him.
The film was so bad that it's worth watching. At one point Zeta-Jones has tears in her eyes because she realizes that Hanks did it all for the love of his late father. The point is -- he didn't "do it all for his late father," as he was trapped in the fucking terminal for nine months.
Another painful scene involved Hanks having to answer ONE simple question. He simply had to say that he was scared to go back home. He would have been free to leave the terminal, and enter the United States, under a claim of asylum. However, he would not do it -- either because he was "honorable," or too stupid to figure out what was going on. From the scene, it's impossible IMO to determine which one it's supposed to be. Maybe both!?!?
The slap happy wet floor, that has everyone falling ass over tea kettle, happened no less than ten times in the terminal at the Kennedy Airport. I half expected a cream pie in the face, but that would have been too sophisticated. I could go on and on, but that went on enough tonight. Pure shit.
It's rare that you find a film that's so bad that you can't stop watching. I'm still stunned by the utter stupidity of this Spielberg garbage. Almost every scene was pointlessly flawed. Plus, it was slow, silly and led the league in product placement. From Starbucks to Burger King to Wetzel's Pretzels (a "must" in every mall) -- they all got a plug in.
A zero out of four, ten, fifteeen..... whatever.
Perfectly awful!!!
SPOILER ALERT!!!!
Basically while the Hanks character's plane is in the air, the foreign government in his country is overthrown. The United States doesn't recognize his new government, so Hanks can't fly back -- or enter the United States. So.....he has to live in the terminal -- unable to speak English. .....and the airport in New York City (Kennedy) doesn't even have an interpreter, so your not sure that the Hanks character (who talks like a bad Latka from Taxi) even understands what just happened once he lands. In fact, after about fifteen minutes you wish he hadn't.
The whole movie boils down to the Hanks character having to leave the airport in NYC to get the one last jazz performer's signature (from a photo of about twenty), so he could put it in a coffee can for his late father. That one last jazz performer plays the Ramada Inn every night, and the Hanks character (who can't decide whether he's goofy, retarded, or sharp enough to wear a Hugo Boss suit and sweep Catherine Zeta-Jones off her feet) could have easily had one of the maintenance staff pick it up three months earlier. In fact, at one point the Hanks character has a bad limp for no apparent reason.
Plus, the head of security (a short bald guy) has a mad-on for the Hanks character for no particular reason. The poor soul (Hanks) is stuck in the airport (through no fault -- at all -- of his own) and the top guy hates him.
The film was so bad that it's worth watching. At one point Zeta-Jones has tears in her eyes because she realizes that Hanks did it all for the love of his late father. The point is -- he didn't "do it all for his late father," as he was trapped in the fucking terminal for nine months.
Another painful scene involved Hanks having to answer ONE simple question. He simply had to say that he was scared to go back home. He would have been free to leave the terminal, and enter the United States, under a claim of asylum. However, he would not do it -- either because he was "honorable," or too stupid to figure out what was going on. From the scene, it's impossible IMO to determine which one it's supposed to be. Maybe both!?!?
The slap happy wet floor, that has everyone falling ass over tea kettle, happened no less than ten times in the terminal at the Kennedy Airport. I half expected a cream pie in the face, but that would have been too sophisticated. I could go on and on, but that went on enough tonight. Pure shit.
It's rare that you find a film that's so bad that you can't stop watching. I'm still stunned by the utter stupidity of this Spielberg garbage. Almost every scene was pointlessly flawed. Plus, it was slow, silly and led the league in product placement. From Starbucks to Burger King to Wetzel's Pretzels (a "must" in every mall) -- they all got a plug in.
A zero out of four, ten, fifteeen..... whatever.
Perfectly awful!!!
