That's where a munch is excellent. Where vanilla folks find common interests in which to meet and enjoy one another's company, for the kinked, munches and clubs are the easy refuge. Clubs are a lot less casual, where munches are very casual.
Do a munch. If your first munch brings one guy out who can hang with you and not whine or be a pain in the butt, then you win, 'cause there's two of you and neither offended the other. Second munch, there's 4 to 8, and usually will surprise you with a woman. Befriend them, and the odds of meeting a play partner are that much greater.
Odds of meeting someone who'll split driving time to a Chicago club gathering of TickleChgo's is greater.
Odds of meeting folks who want to gather is greater.
Odds of gaining confidence in oneself DESPITE being kinked is greater. Means not sweating that you have a kink when a vanilla woman takes interest. Women are WAY more open-minded than men. Heck, I'll guarantee you there's a woman reading this right now who was introduced to this kink and decided it was an easy way to meet interesting men who were schooled, socially, to play nicely with them in public.
You can always PM me to ask questions on setup, and organization. You wouldn't be the first. Many gatherings hosts have, and it IS my goal to have these events all over. 🙂