What's the difference between Dominance and being Ornery?

[tickleshotel]

Just a question that I was pondering , I am definitely Dominant as I know what I want and I go after it , but I wonder if there is a correlation between being Dominant and being Ornery.
I could be wrong but I think being Ornery is like being Dominant in some way ,but Ornery is different

What are your thoughts?

 

[ticklishscribe]

To me "dominant" is being in control and "ornery" is just complaining. I could be wrong in this case.​

Just a question that I was pondering , I am definitely Dominant as I know what I want and I go after it , but I wonder if there is a correlation between being Dominant and being Ornery.
I could be wrong but I think being Ornery is like being Dominant in some way ,but Ornery is different

What are your thoughts?

 

[Deleted member 66627]

How did you come to this assumption, I'm really curious on your input.

 

[Redmage]

Just a question that I was pondering , I am definitely Dominant as I know what I want and I go after it...

Well, first off that doesn't mean you're Dominant. I know many subs who know what they want and go after it. Dominance and submission are about the way two or more people relate to one another, not the way any of them relates to life.

I wonder if there is a correlation between being Dominant and being Ornery.
I could be wrong but I think being Ornery is like being Dominant in some way ,but Ornery is different

Well, here's how I understand "ornery:"

or·ner·y –adjective
1. ugly and unpleasant in disposition or temper: No one can get along with my ornery cousin.
2. stubborn: I can't do a thing with that ornery mule.
3. low or vile.
4. inferior or common; ordinary.

I usually use it to mean some combination of 1 and 2, and in that sense I don't think it's related to Dominance - though of course there are some ornery Doms out there.

How do you understand that word when you use it?

 

[Deleted member 66627]

How do you understand that word when you use it?

Tis what I'm waiting for.

And I totally agree with the Dominant aspect.

It's a lot more involved then;

"OMG CHEESE I WANT CHEESE I HAVE CHEESE I RULE!"

 

[tickleshotel]

Well, first off that doesn't mean you're Dominant. I know many subs who know what they want and go after it. Dominance and submission are about the way two or more people relate to one another, not the way any of them relates to life.

Well, here's how I understand "ornery:"

or·ner·y –adjective
1. ugly and unpleasant in disposition or temper: No one can get along with my ornery cousin.
2. stubborn: I can't do a thing with that ornery mule.
3. low or vile.
4. inferior or common; ordinary.

I usually use it to mean some combination of 1 and 2, and in that sense I don't think it's related to Dominance - though of course there are some ornery Doms out there.

How do you understand that word when you use it?

Tis what I'm waiting for.

And I totally agree with the Dominant aspect.

It's a lot more involved then;

"OMG CHEESE I WANT CHEESE I HAVE CHEESE I RULE!"

Redmage, thank you for that informative description of what Ornery means to you . I agree that Dominance is deeper than just knowing what you want and going after it. I think I wasn't clear in stating that a big part of why I feel I am dominant is that I crave being the one being in control not only tickling wise but in the behavior,actions that I do covering many layers . I love the dynamics between the two roles but don't find myself being submissive .
Going back to the Ornery question, Ornery is a combination of 1 and 2 when I think about it too.

I was questioning this due to a conversation I had with a friend on the phone and he is quite dominant himself and I had another friend who was listening to the conversation and her remark was that he was being Ornery as his mood was beyond Dominant,his mood came across to me like it wasn't the control ,dominance in him,there was a definite manner where the dominance seemed to me to be on the edge of Ornery where it became ugly,he was a bit cocky might be a better term

 

[baldadonis]

Well, first off that doesn't mean you're Dominant. I know many subs who know what they want and go after it. Dominance and submission are about the way two or more people relate to one another, not the way any of them relates to life.

Couldn't have said it better Redmage. I don't think being ornery and dominance really have any connection. One's dominance is defined by how they relate to another(s) and how other's react accordingly. Orneriness is a character trait. The most submissive person can be prone to orneriness and someone purely dominant may be absolutely calm, controlling, and mild-mannered, never ornery. I really don't see any connection between these two things at all.

Someone who is acting forceful, or is really upset, or acting out, is not necessarily dominant. These are just outward expressions of emotion. Unless people would normally react submissively as a reaction to this behavior, there is nothing dominant about it.

 

[ticklebunny 2]

I believe that there is a great big difference between the terms/concepts of being ornery and being dominant. Being ornery in my view is when a person is being really playful and very bold, bit provocative, and really bit challenging; streak of naughtiness and streak of spontaneity and boldness. It is kind of a playful invitation, playful encounter. Whereas streak of being ornery is more like the slow anticipation of being maybe dominant later on if the mood strikes, kind of sets the stage for a playful naughty tone.

Whereas I think the difference of being ornery and being dominant is that there is a huge difference. Being dominant means you go after what you want within limits and boundaries respected and honored of course, nothing against anyone's will. The way I think of it is it like being ornery more like playful sexual banter, verbal teasing-setting the mood getting hot- dominance about going after what you want, doing your best to sweet persuade and seduce the person to love what you want-dominance and assertiveness go hand in hand-just like romance and seduction go hand in hand in my mind.

It is not about forcing anyone-it is more a sensual always consentual emotional and mental seduction of the mind, heart, and body in my view. It is seduction at its best and its passion at its most intense and greatest, most ultimate.

There is something very powerful and very dynamic and passionate about being dominant-having two people playfully and erotically dominate each other sexually, sensually and especially when erotic tickling is thrown in the mix during the sensual sexual touches between two intimate partners, whether this be engaging in sex, erotic massage, oral, or just intense passionate love making-add restraints and bondage and role play-consensual-dynamic
passionate night.

Dominance is hot, it is sexy, incredible and a thrill like no other, yes you guessed it I am very much a passionate lover for dominance, not hurtful dominance, but playful fun casual and when intimate with hubby very sensual sexual and passionate dominance when it comes to tickling, foreplay and intimate sexual acts-oral and erotic massage and playful slow teasing and tickling too of course.....nothing is sweeter than seeing your partner, your love restrained and at your mercy helpless and exposed vulnerable and can't get away,,,,especially hot when your other partner just as excited just as passionate about being playfully yet assertively dominated and being submissive as you are about dominating him or her. That is sooooooooo hot!!

To me that is where the difference lies. Orneriness is a slow foreplay verbal and physical wise, sets the stage like romance sets stage passionate night of lovemaking. Whereas dominance and a eagerness to make it happen makes that night a passionate evening or day never to be forgotten

My friend tickleshotel is very dominant and I don't find nothing wrong with that, nothing more awesome and neater than tickle dominating a person playfully of course and even casually still a thrill even if on friendship level. Dominance is a rush, something my friend tickleshotel and me share we are very dominant ladies, she is a lioness and I am the tigress and we love to be in charge when doing the tickling-love to dominate-love to see our lees squirm and wiggle and go crazy.

no rush and no thrill like ittickleshotel and me being dominant follows other aspects in our lives as well.
When we both want something and we want it bad enough-we seize and go after it and we get what we want.
This doesn't just go for tickling for tickleshotel and me but in other key areas as well as expressing our dominance and passion in the bedroom as well. When we are passionate and feel strongly on something we go after it and we don't give up-persistent

 

[Deleted member 66627]

Um. What?

or·ner·y

adjective

1. ugly and unpleasant in disposition or temper: No one can get along with my ornery cousin.

2. stubborn: I can't do a thing with that ornery mule.

3. low or vile.

4. inferior or common; ordinary.

or·ner·i·ness, noun

Synonyms- 1. mean, ill-tempered, ill-natured, surly, testy.

 

[Redmage]

Redmage, thank you for that informative description of what Ornery means to you . I agree that Dominance is deeper than just knowing what you want and going after it. I think I wasn't clear in stating that a big part of why I feel I am dominant is that I crave being the one being in control not only tickling wise but in the behavior,actions that I do covering many layers . I love the dynamics between the two roles but don't find myself being submissive .
Going back to the Ornery question, Ornery is a combination of 1 and 2 when I think about it too.

I think you might have some toppy qualities, which aren't really all that rare in bottoms. My favorite 'lee is very picky about how she's tickled, but when it comes down to it she doesn't want to be in control beyond keeping it within the range of sensations that she most enjoys.

You seem to have the same interest in regulating what happens to you, but a Dominant tends to get off on controlling what happens to his or her partner. That's an important difference.

As for orneriness, that's a completely different quality that might be found in both subs and Doms.

 

[vellicator]

This is one really interesting discusion involving the differing personalities of those approaching the realm being a ticklee or tickler, or top or bottom ( or being a switch for that matter)
I believe Remage and Ticklebunny both gave excellant analysis of these types of interactions. So I will leave it at that.

V

 

[Excess]

I think she is meaning more like dominant to a fault, arrogant and just plain mean. Like those doms you see that will threaten a guy at every turn and tie him up and beat him just because she feels like it and always be very smug about how she can dominate anyone at anytime she feels like without being challenged.

Redmage, thank you for that informative description of what Ornery means to you . I agree that Dominance is deeper than just knowing what you want and going after it. I think I wasn't clear in stating that a big part of why I feel I am dominant is that I crave being the one being in control not only tickling wise but in the behavior,actions that I do covering many layers . I love the dynamics between the two roles but don't find myself being submissive .

Wait, didn't you use to be a lee or switch?

 

[ikaiyoo]

Just a question that I was pondering , I am definitely Dominant as I know what I want and I go after it , but I wonder if there is a correlation between being Dominant and being Ornery.
I could be wrong but I think being Ornery is like being Dominant in some way ,but Ornery is different

What are your thoughts?

I thought someone who was ornery is defiant... and to be dominant is to be controlling or to exert influence...

 

[Mister Scruff]

I laughed at the title of this thread. God forgive me but I did. I don't know why, either; I mean I know there are Dom/mes on the TMF and I know none of them fit the stereotype of sexually repressed/ dysfunctional middle-aged middle-management males with a bald spot and a Napoleon complex, but yeah. That's what I'd call "ornery", that type of person. Dominance doesn't require that, on the evidence I've seen.

Excess: I love you like a fat kid loves caek xD

 

[Excess]

I laughed at the title of this thread. God forgive me but I did. I don't know why, either; I mean I know there are Dom/mes on the TMF and I know none of them fit the stereotype of sexually repressed/ dysfunctional middle-aged middle-management males with a bald spot and a Napoleon complex, but yeah. That's what I'd call "ornery", that type of person. Dominance doesn't require that, on the evidence I've seen.

Excess: I love you like a fat kid loves caek xD

You think the title is bad? When I initially saw it, I saw Ornery as...another Or-word. I don't think I need to mention what I thought that word was.

And are you serious about the no dom stereotype thing? I'd say that likely a noticeable chunk of the TMF membership consists of such stereotypes, sitting at their computer with their dicks hanging out. You just don't hear from them because you lack cleavage that bulges out further than your gut.

 

[evilwomanhehe]

I think if you're dominant you can be ornery at the same time. For example, you say to your 'lee "you're going to laugh your ass off in a few seconds and you WILL like it." That way, you're showing your domination and your orneryness at the same time.



Victoria

 

[Mister Scruff]

you lack cleavage that bulges out further than your gut.

You can't say that with any authority. Srsly if any of those stereotypes are reading this PM me, I have some... files you may be interested in.



The files are 3guys1hammer.mp4