When Flirting Goes To Cheese :disgust:

[Labyrinthgddss]

Ok so I realized something and its rather strange...I dont like it when a guy comes onto me and flirts with me...It offends me...LOL Strange yes because i like to flirt... so let me explain a little.
I dont like games- i am a very straight forward person...so clubs are a no go...LOL and flirting well, i guess the best way to say this is that i dont like men who are insincere flirts...why waste my time with cheese ball flirting that isnt heartfelt. Paying lip service is an insult to both the person giving it and the person being subjected to it. I am very big on meaning what u say and saying what u mean and frankly what would touch u more?? Something sincere and genuine or something so polished and practiced that u feel cheap? Now that doesnt mean if a good friend of mine comes up and plays the fool for me i would be offended but a stranger is different. The person i know is usually doing the cheese ball routine to make me laugh and brighten up my day* but they do give sincere compliments when they can. And yes i can tell the difference between a compliment and some cheese ball...so if a stranger approaches me i dont just attack... i pay attention and listen to little things like their voice or gestures...give me some credit people.LOL ok so i may expand on this some more later when my brain can truly function but for now u get the idea.
Nite people.

 

[cloudgazer2k]

the best way to flirt, in my opinion, is to start simple. it goes like this:
"Hi."

people gotta cheese it up, it's cuz they watched too many romance comedies and think that's the way to go. little do they know...

 

[Stage Whisper]

I never learned flirting. : / I think I missed that class. Was it one of those electives you could take in middle school or something? If so, that would explain it; I was too busy with choir and the like.

 

[ViperGTS]

Flirting is about the simplest thing to do, but only for those with a certain special ability.

If someone is able to be subtly sexual, in nuances, gestures, and sayings, without being overtly so, they can flirt.

For instance. A guy walks towards an attractive woman at a club. Their eyes meet by chance. he smiles, his head is tilted every so slightly down so he's looking up at her just a bit, and he says, "Hi."

This gets much better reaction that the same guy saying, "Hey baby" while sauntering up to her all jiggalo like.

I don't know how to describe it...flirting is a very sexual thing but to varying degrees...people who can...'exude' sexuality without being gross or blunt about it find flirting to come naturally to them. I think it's got something to do with the releasing of pheromones and how one is able to tune them into another person...but what do I know, I'm just a kid.

Heh.

 

[steph]

Him: "Is your mother a terrorist?"
Me: "Hell no, my mother's Italian. Why?"
Him: "Because you're the bomb!"

True story, happened with a new patient of mine yesterday. At least he waited until the END of the conversation to unload THAT gem on me. By that time I'd decided he was a cool cat and that he was just trying to be funny.

Had he started with that line, I might have had to roll my eyes and leave, just on principle~let's see how he likes being questioned by my partner-in-crime Jose, a 400 pound Mexican.

(sighs) Why do people flirt cheesy? I don't know. Maybe to break the ice, lack of confidence, afraid they're incapable of having real conversation with a stranger....

Thank God I'm too old for the bar scene and don't have to deal with that kind of stuff much. Usually, with me, guys who are interested just say "hi" and start a conversation, or they smile and you know, kind of hold your eyes a little too long. I'm a sucker for that one, used m'self a time or two--VERY effective...
XOXO

 

[huskys]

There is a fine line between funny and cheesy sometimes. And yes, I've seen some guys completely stuff it up.
I prefer to just be myself as well. And its easier too!!! lol

 

[drew70]

Just like there are finely aged cheeses to titillate the pallate, there's an art, and appreciation of cheesy pickup lines. The only value to this art is strictly comedic, it is of absolutely no use in achieving that for which it was originally designed.

"Girl, you must be a parking ticket, cause you got FINE written all over you!"

"Say there. How'd you like to meet the head of a large firm?"

"That's a beautiful dress you're wearing, but I think it would look better crumpled up in the corner of my bedroom"​

It's like a challenge to come up with the most blatantly arrogant line, that one remark that's most likely to elicit a slap in the face; but without resorting to something like "Hey, ya wanna fuck?" Not that these other lines are any less vulgar, but the art is in the ludicrous efforts to present the proposition in a more socially acceptable format.

 

[cloudgazer2k]

a good friend of mine told me a good one once:

"Hey, wanna go out for pizza and sex?"

"No."

"What, don't like pizza?"

i think it's funny when guys have to use lines, as if just saying "Hello", or introducing yourself, or even *gasp* buying her another drink from the other end of the bar. and yes, that last one does work on occasion. it's the little things that matter, not the dog-and-pony act some sex-deprived guys put on.

 

[GirlWhoLikes2Laugh]

I am not good at flirting because I struggle with reading people's body language but since I've been going to my social skills class I am getting much better at it. If I see a guy I like, I'd much rather go to him and be straighforward with him instead of playing games like flirting with him.


I am not sure if this really has to do with this topic but I don't beleive in that love at first sight crap. It's better to get to know someone first before you decide that you love them.

 

[Labyrinthgddss]

my thing with the cheesy flirting is that i dont think that people who dont know me should flirt with me...they dont know a thing about me...and i dont know them... i would rather get to know them first and know that my first reaction to them was right or wrong.
**I believe that flirting should be subtle, natural and what u feel ok doing... if u dont do the batting eyelashes for example then dont...if u dont feel comfortable doing it then chances are u probably look funny doing it. Even if u are shy( like me) u can still flirt...of course even if u dont feel u are flirting someone interested in u might see it that way as long as u arent telling them that u are an evil bitch and liable to bite off important body parts( i had a friend who actually said this to a guy at a bar)...
I guess me being shy makes going to a bar hard for me unless i am there with enough friends that its hard to approach...which is probably why now i dont go to bars even though i am only 23...( i am old for my age)...
Well i gotta sleep...the evil bakery calls....Nite everyone

But i would like to thank everyone for taking the time to add their input u people just totally rock...LOL

 

[tcklft]

"Say there. How'd you like to meet the head of a large firm?"
​

Classic. Absolutely classic.

 

[kered]

I find flirting fun and almost consider it an art form. The best at flirting can done without words. A simple glance and smile, or a shift in eyebrow or stance can really get things rolling. A truly wonderful form of non-verbal communication if not over done.

 

[Bizkit]

Him: "Is your mother a terrorist?"
Me: "Hell no, my mother's Italian. Why?"
Him: "Because you're the bomb!"

I like that.There is a girl I am interested in,maybe I will give that a try.I am usually not great at starting conversations but that sounds like a good starting point. 🙄

 

[MrPartickler]

my thing with the cheesy flirting is that i dont think that people who dont know me should flirt with me...they dont know a thing about me...and i dont know them... i would rather get to know them first and know that my first reaction to them was right or wrong.
**I believe that flirting should be subtle, natural and what u feel ok doing... if u dont do the batting eyelashes for example then dont...if u dont feel comfortable doing it then chances are u probably look funny doing it. Even if u are shy( like me) u can still flirt...of course even if u dont feel u are flirting someone interested in u might see it that way as long as u arent telling them that u are an evil bitch and liable to bite off important body parts( i had a friend who actually said this to a guy at a bar)...
I guess me being shy makes going to a bar hard for me unless i am there with enough friends that its hard to approach...which is probably why now i dont go to bars even though i am only 23...( i am old for my age)...
Well i gotta sleep...the evil bakery calls....Nite everyone

But i would like to thank everyone for taking the time to add their input u people just totally rock...LOL

I understand your reactions as you say you're very shy. As a single guy, however, I've always found shyness to be a liability when it comes to dating and meeting women. So over time I've successfully managed to overcome it. Both people can't just sit back and be afraid to approach, or flirt, or try new things and/or make something happen or else most of the time, absolutely nothing is going to happen. That's just a waste to me.

My advice to guys would be to do whatever actually works for them. (Almost anything can work if done in the right way.) And there are few things in life you're 100% comfortable with the first time you try them. Most things take practice to gain confidence in and be any good at.

So just have fun with it. No matter what you do some women will think it's cheesy, some will think it's stupid, some will get offended, and still others won't get it at all. However, you only need your approach to work for a few--perhaps even just one if that's all you want. So laugh it off, and go for it! 🙂

 

[Labyrinthgddss]

I understand your reactions as you say you're very shy. As a single guy, however, I've always found shyness to be a liability when it comes to dating and meeting women. So over time I've successfully managed to overcome it. Both people can't just sit back and be afraid to approach, or flirt, or try new things and/or make something happen or else most of the time, absolutely nothing is going to happen. That's just a waste to me.

My advice to guys would be to do whatever actually works for them. (Almost anything can work if done in the right way.) And there are few things in life you're 100% comfortable with the first time you try them. Most things take practice to gain confidence in and be any good at.

So just have fun with it. No matter what you do some women will think it's cheesy, some will think it's stupid, some will get offended, and still others won't get it at all. However, you only need your approach to work for a few--perhaps even just one if that's all you want. So laugh it off, and go for it! 🙂

LOL well said...*yeah i do agree with what u said 🙂

 

[scorpionldr]

a good friend of mine told me a good one once:

"Hey, wanna go out for pizza and sex?"

"No."

"What, don't like pizza?"

i think it's funny when guys have to use lines, as if just saying "Hello", or introducing yourself, or even *gasp* buying her another drink from the other end of the bar. and yes, that last one does work on occasion. it's the little things that matter, not the dog-and-pony act some sex-deprived guys put on.

the little things don't matter for me. I used to believe in them....noone appreciates shit like that anymore though.

I think one of these days i just want to walk up to someone and simply say, "let's go fuck". No mind games, no questions, no problems, just "do you want it or not" style.

 

[Chuck D]

This was a favorite of mine: he - you must be tired, she - why, he - cause you have been running around in my head all night! (never used it but it always cracked me up to here someone say it)

my thing with the cheesy flirting is that i dont think that people who dont know me should flirt with me...they dont know a thing about me...and i dont know them... i would rather get to know them first and know that my first reaction to them was right or wrong.

Thats the way i kind of see it. I at least like to find something in common/associate/click with before i flirt. The only time i would ever use a cheesy flirty line is if i knew she would find it humorous, and knew that the humor of it was the only reason i said it.

 

[Helena]

I understand your reactions as you say you're very shy. As a single guy, however, I've always found shyness to be a liability when it comes to dating and meeting women. So over time I've successfully managed to overcome it. Both people can't just sit back and be afraid to approach, or flirt, or try new things and/or make something happen or else most of the time, absolutely nothing is going to happen. That's just a waste to me.

My advice to guys would be to do whatever actually works for them. (Almost anything can work if done in the right way.) And there are few things in life you're 100% comfortable with the first time you try them. Most things take practice to gain confidence in and be any good at.

So just have fun with it. No matter what you do some women will think it's cheesy, some will think it's stupid, some will get offended, and still others won't get it at all. However, you only need your approach to work for a few--perhaps even just one if that's all you want. So laugh it off, and go for it! 🙂

I think flirting goes wrong when it is not sincere. I welcome it as long as it is natural.
All of us have an unconscious set of behaviors that we use to show interest in each other. Actual flirting takes place when our instincts over ride our thinking. When I am truly interested in someone, I twirl my hair, lick my lips, smile, and giggle without thinking my action through first.
I think flirting gets cheesy when it seems unnatural. For example, a person's body language isn't congruent with what they are saying.

 

[MrPartickler]

I think flirting goes wrong when it is not sincere. I welcome it as long as it is natural.
All of us have an unconscious set of behaviors that we use to show interest in each other. Actual flirting takes place when our instincts over ride our thinking. When I am truly interested in someone, I twirl my hair, lick my lips, smile, and giggle without thinking my action through first.
I think flirting gets cheesy when it seems unnatural. For example, a person's body language isn't congruent with what they are saying.

I think it's almost impossible to go wrong with flirting actually. 😀 It usually just involves some interesting conversation--verbal and nonverbal--that may reveal some deeper level of attraction. Or it may just all be done in good fun. Anyway, anything sincere can appear "unnatural" if someone's, say, nervous for some reason. I've certainly been there, and many others have been as well. The only way to get past that, in my experience, is, well, to get more experience. However, as I said before, sitting back and waiting for a "natural-seeming" moment is not a very practical option for most guys, IMO.

Apart from that, there are no universal cues for revealing or judging interest. People are just different. I've certainly had women interested in me who've literally shown me signs that would indicate quite the opposite. In fact, the only way I discovered their interest in me was by them contacting me sometime afterward to follow-up. (Usually, by then, I'd assumed they weren't interested.) Then there are the cases where you might think someone is interested based on the "signs," and they're really not. (A recent story comes to mind about me flirting with two attractive women, getting one's phone number, and finding out later they were a lesbian couple. lol)

So now I just say, anyone who flirts does so at their own risk. For any number of reasons, the other person may just not respond in kind and/or "get it." But that's OK; try something or someone else. It's just flirting. 🙂

 

[Helena]

I think it's almost impossible to go wrong with flirting actually. 😀 It usually just involves some interesting conversation--verbal and nonverbal--that may reveal some deeper level of attraction. Or it may just all be done in good fun. Anyway, anything sincere can appear "unnatural" if someone's, say, nervous for some reason. I've certainly been there, and many others have been as well. The only way to get past that, in my experience, is, well, to get more experience. However, as I said before, sitting back and waiting for a "natural-seeming" moment is not a very practical option for most guys, IMO.

Apart from that, there are no universal cues for revealing or judging interest. People are just different. I've certainly had women interested in me who've literally shown me signs that would indicate quite the opposite. In fact, the only way I discovered their interest in me was by them contacting me sometime afterward to follow-up. (Usually, by then, I'd assumed they weren't interested.) Then there are the cases where you might think someone is interested based on the "signs," and they're really not. (A recent story comes to mind about me flirting with two attractive women, getting one's phone number, and finding out later they were a lesbian couple. lol)

So now I just say, anyone who flirts does so at their own risk. For any number of reasons, the other person may just not respond in kind and/or "get it." But that's OK; try something or someone else. It's just flirting. 🙂

After reading this post, I want to revise my answer. I suggested that body language is always an indication of sincerity in flirting. Now I have changed my mind. It isn't always a good indicator. I remember times when my nerves were completely shot when I got within 50 feet of someone I was interested in.
However, I still think that there are universal, unconscious signals men and women give each other to show interest. There are cues that men and women use that are very alike, regarless of the language they speak, their social status, or religion, to test a person's sexual interest.
In attraction, I do not stop and think, I react, with butterflies, giddiness, sweaty palms and a flushed face.
I didn't mean that there would be a natural seeming moment to flirt; I meant that flirting is natural.
I guess flirting can be cheesy if one uses pick up lines, over and over, on 20 people in a night at the same club. LOL

 

[Illtcklu]

Him: "Is your mother a terrorist?"
Me: "Hell no, my mother's Italian. Why?"
Him: "Because you're the bomb!"

Good one. My all time fav....


Shit. I lost my number....


can I have yours?

 

[steph]

Sad to say it was a new one on me. It gets worse. I returned the next day to remind him to apply for assistance. He only has use of one hand due to a gunshot 10 years ago that shattered his wrist and hand completely--the surgery he had to fuse at the time was a total failure. So I walk in like it was any other day and he's bending down to pick something up, fresh out of the shower, towel around his waist...Well, it dropped. I'm like "oh, um, whoops, sorry dude, I'll check back in a few..."
"No, no, it's ok," he says smiling. "let me ask you something--do you know real estate?"
"A little bit," I say, "My mom's an agent."
"Well then, can you tell me--does this look like it's a WHOLE LOT?"

Honey, if I had a dime for every patient who flashed me his johnson over the years, I could've retired at 30!
XOXO

Good one. My all time fav....


Shit. I lost my number....


can I have yours?

 

[Labyrinthgddss]

oddly enough i was telling a friend of mine about this and we started going on with pick up lines...LOL well the new guy at work was horrified to hear that women get told those lines...apparently he never heard those lines used...we told him to stick around and be prepared to be horrified some more...