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Where are all the female 'lee' users?

N

ncsuaeo

TMF Novice
Joined
Feb 23, 2012
Messages
71
Points
6
Hey, I've been exploring and there doesn't seem to be a whole lot of younger female lees around that aren't that active.

Any suggestions?
 
That's true. If you do come across a profile that looks like a young lady, 9 times out of 10 it's some sick bastard of a guy.

I will say that I have a lee in my long time girlfriend. She was very welcoming to my fetish. Some have had luck with fetlife and some on this site. Then there's the larger group who pay models or escorts for their tickle services.

Moral of the story is: it's bloody difficult to find a young female lee.
 
"9 times out of 10 it's some sick bastard of a guy."

that's so true, I never know how to distinguish between the true people and the fake ones.
 
If I had to guess, they're hiding/have been scared off by all the creepers.
 
So I guess you posted the OP in response to my post on being unable to find female lers.

I guess the takeaway is that women of any persuasion, lee or ler, seem to be largely flying under the radar in the tickling community, and the male to female ratio is insane. Also, of the women who are active on the forum, once you take out the ones who are only interested in girls, or are in a monogamous relationship with a guy, or are clearly fake, then you're left with almost no one.
 
MaleTickleeDC said:
...Also, of the women who are active on the forum, once you take out the ones who are only interested in girls, or are in a monogamous relationship with a guy, or are clearly fake, then you're left with almost no one.
Click to expand...

The same can be stated of the guys. Once you rule out the ones only interested in m/m conversation, or the ones in a monogamous relationship with a vanilla woman and come here just to get a quick fix, the ones who are fake (yes, that happens in reverse too with women who pretend to be men), you are actually still left with quite a few legit male fetishists.

HOWEVER, then you have to rule out the ones who, just because they only come here for a quick fix, think that it's okay to treat the women of this site like their own personal fetish play toy, as if we are just here simply to cure their itch and not for our own purposes. Then rule out the ones also into the BDSM thing and treat us as if we are some slave to act out their own fantasy. Then, rule out the ones who don't get enough, if any, tickling in their real life so they WAY over do it on here by being clingy as hell and possessive of us if we give them the time of day to begin with, they then feel like they own us. Then, also rule out the ones who are so socially deprived that the only thing you can get out of them is "I wants to tikle ur feet" and can't be bothered to have a conversation about such if it doesn't include some type of forced roleplay.

I'm not sure if any other ladies have the same issue, but these are just a few of the issues I have run into with men who have tried to talk to me through this site. And generally, I don't respond to threads such as these. But I, for one, am tired of seeing "Where the ladies at?" followed by a post indicating that most of us are either fake or shy or not interested in men.

I was not meaning to attack the OP, and I am sorry if I did. But I was just trying to point out that the ladies here have it rough too. Hang in there. You'll find someone to chat with soon.
 
Candygirl said:
HOWEVER, then you have to rule out the ones who, just because they only come here for a quick fix, think that it's okay to treat the women of this site like their own personal fetish play toy, as if we are just here simply to cure their itch and not for our own purposes. Then rule out the ones also into the BDSM thing and treat us as if we are some slave to act out their own fantasy. Then, rule out the ones who don't get enough, if any, tickling in their real life so they WAY over do it on here by being clingy as hell and possessive of us if we give them the time of day to begin with, they then feel like they own us. Then, also rule out the ones who are so socially deprived that the only thing you can get out of them is "I wants to tikle ur feet" and can't be bothered to have a conversation about such if it doesn't include some type of forced roleplay.
Click to expand...

I understand your need to rule some of the guys you describe above out, though I will say that ruling out a guy who gets little to no tickling in real life is a bit unfair, because you don't KNOW he's going to be all doting or controlling because of it, and also if you only stick to guys getting lots of tickling in real life, you're pretty much guaranteeing yourself that you'll end up with a player. I know women would like to think that they can snag this awesome, in demand guy who has tons of girls chasing him and that you'll be "the one" that he chooses to settle down with, but usually a guy who has that much game isn't settling down with anyone.

Also, in order to "rule out" all the kinds of guys you describe above, you'd have to actually talk to them to make the determination that they fit in one of those categories. Again, a lot of us guys just don't see those conversations happening here on the forum. If there were a ton of women here talking to guys enough to determine whether they're creepy or not, controlling or not, etc, we would see a lot more female activity on the forum, in the personals section, etc. I think instead what's going on is the girls around here have one bad experience and then decide that "all these guys are creepers" and either leave or lurk without really communicating.
 
Wow! This is a fascinating thread. I have to admit, it has never occurred to me that there would be women posing as men. I can't even imagine. I guess I am so accustomed to the opposite. I joined the TMF for the freedom it gave me to talk and to listen to others about this fetish. I became a Producer later on and this site and the members have, with few exceptions been very supportive and positive. I can count on one hand, though, the number of female members who have bought any of my clips; but that is to be expected.
It seems to me that very few "available" female members actively participate in conversations here.
I might be wrong, but it is the impression I get at a glance. Having spent endless occasions talking to a "female" lee and discovering that she was a he, I can understand how a male member can feel like this is the case 100% of the time.
 
MaleTickleeDC said:
I understand your need to rule some of the guys you describe above out, though I will say that ruling out a guy who gets little to no tickling in real life is a bit unfair, because you don't KNOW he's going to be all doting or controlling because of it...
Click to expand...

Of course I don't "rule someone out" before talking to them first to see if he even fits into one of the scenarios I mentioned. I think it's wrong to judge people before you get to know them.

MaleTickleeDC said:
...and also if you only stick to guys getting lots of tickling in real life, you're pretty much guaranteeing yourself that you'll end up with a player. I know women would like to think that they can snag this awesome, in demand guy who has tons of girls chasing him and that you'll be "the one" that he chooses to settle down with, but usually a guy who has that much game isn't settling down with anyone.
Click to expand...

I never once, in anything that I posted here, insinuated that I was looking to "snag" anyone. I am talking about just a simple conversation, whether tickling is included or not. I talk to several guys who are either tickled or get to tickle someone regularly, and they don't act like a "player" at all. They are still down to earth, regular, respectable men.

MaleTickleeDC said:
...Also, in order to "rule out" all the kinds of guys you describe above, you'd have to actually talk to them to make the determination that they fit in one of those categories. Again, a lot of us guys just don't see those conversations happening here on the forum. If there were a ton of women here talking to guys enough to determine whether they're creepy or not, controlling or not, etc, we would see a lot more female activity on the forum, in the personals section, etc. I think instead what's going on is the girls around here have one bad experience and then decide that "all these guys are creepers" and either leave or lurk without really communicating.
Click to expand...

My comments were based off of chats via PM with random guys who message me, interactions with some of them here on the forums, or direct conversations had in the chat room. I think it's fair to say that I've talked to more than enough to get a general understanding of the categories I mentioned and am a good enough judge of character to, after of course talking to them a bit first, decide which category they fit in and proceed accordingly.

I think more likely what's happening here is even when a girl DOES become active, she automatically has a target on her back. Go into the chat room and watch a girl (or to be fair, one claiming to be so) say a simple hi to the room. She is immediately bombarded with tons of greetings and requests to PM from at least half a dozen guys. It's the same in the personals section. They post, and the thread gets flooded. Check them. There are several that females here have posted and within a day or two there's at least 2 pages full of responses. I may not be friends with all the girls here on the site, but I have talked to several (at least a dozen or so) who would say the same thing, and agree that yeah, they've had bad incidents, but they don't let that cloud their judgement towards all the OTHER men on this site.

Lastly, you JUST said earlier that you had to "rule out" certain types of women to weed through and find the ones who meet the criteria of the type you are looking for. AND I QUOTE "...Also, of the women who are active on the forum, once you take out the ones who are only interested in girls, or are in a monogamous relationship with a guy, or are clearly fake, then you're left with almost no one."
So am I to assume that since you stated that I can't rule out the kinds of guys I described unless I actually talked to them to do so, that means that YOU, in turn, have actually talked to all the girls on the site as well to come to your assessments?
 
So, additionally, the way it is coming across, is that YOU guys are saying that because you talk to one "girl" who turned out to be a guy, you generally assume that all of us are fake. But it's NOT okay for us at the same time, upon talking to one guy who turned out to be a total douche, to assume that they all are douche bags? Talk about your double standard.
 
The great thing about this forum is also its greatest problem. Essentially, the facelessness of online communities gives you the comfort to freely express interests and desires. That's great. The problem arises when said comfort is utilized as a tool of evading consequence. So you will have people who will abuse being anonymous. It happens on the male and female side. My opinion is that it happens on the male side more often because of our sexuality. As a previous poster noted, many are out for a quick fix while ladies are more concerned with emotions. That is the case a good bit of the time.
 
So, I'm going to throw the Seattle area under the bus on this one! Oh, I know this is about cyber land, and to make a long story short all the real women are playing with each other in real life while all the men are pissing and moaning online that there are no women to talk to in cyber space.

A few years ago after the munches had died out some of us on TMF tried to start them back up. Here is what happen;
The women were all for it, but the men were not. Since a bunch of us were already on FL we moved over to it with the creation of the group called the Seattle Tickling Enthusiasts. Again when discussing places to meet up the women were already members of the local play space and were willing to guest non members (yes even men) into the club. Again the men did not want to go to the club and put little to no effort into discussing an alternative venue. Guess what! The women got tired of a munch that did not seem to be getting off the drawing board and simply decided to meet up at the club when their schedules permitted and which parties they wanted to attend. So while the men were hanging out in cyber land the women were hanging out in real life land. The funny thing is now I can still go back to the group look through the members' section and everyone that I have met in person (at the club) are only the women! I do not recall ever meeting with any of the men.

So, yah I dunno about you but I would much rather talk to people in person than online!

Moral of the story is, if single women are comfortable with going to the local play space then it's probably a fairly welcoming and safe place to go. And if you are worried about it look the place up on line! Use google, fetlife to see if it has a group, or you can even ask on here if anyone has been.

Not only that, but anyone in the DC area who is trying to meet with other fetishist and hasn't tried attending Black Rose's Tickle SIG go give it a try! While I will admit when I was in the area last I did not attend any of their events my schedule just didn't quite match up, but I definitely would in the future.

So, there's my 2 cents.
And on a side note, believe it or not, but you don't actually have to be afraid of other kinky people or bdsm clubs or parties! Maybe I've just been lucky, but all the ones I've been to have been very welcoming and even to the foot fetishists. Fuck! I know few of the foot worshipping presenters (with a foot fetish) in the NOVA/DC/MD area who have also presented for several big events. So, if your not a creeper you'll be fine!

Ah-hah! I just remembered something else that apparently needs to be mentioned. Regardless of the online community or dating site if a member stated that she is a woman in her profile she has a very high probability of being bombarded with unsolicited PMs from all sorts of people and many are apparently less than respectful let alone courteous. Though, this is not always the case for some women, but far to many have had to deal with this stuff. So, it can be beneficial for a women to either not clarify her gender or to say she is a he. If you want some awesome examples of this check out Return To Sender on Fetlife.
 
Candygirl said:
The same can be stated of the guys. Once you rule out the ones only interested in m/m conversation, or the ones in a monogamous relationship with a vanilla woman and come here just to get a quick fix, the ones who are fake (yes, that happens in reverse too with women who pretend to be men), you are actually still left with quite a few legit male fetishists.

HOWEVER, then you have to rule out the ones who, just because they only come here for a quick fix, think that it's okay to treat the women of this site like their own personal fetish play toy, as if we are just here simply to cure their itch and not for our own purposes. Then rule out the ones also into the BDSM thing and treat us as if we are some slave to act out their own fantasy. Then, rule out the ones who don't get enough, if any, tickling in their real life so they WAY over do it on here by being clingy as hell and possessive of us if we give them the time of day to begin with, they then feel like they own us. Then, also rule out the ones who are so socially deprived that the only thing you can get out of them is "I wants to tikle ur feet" and can't be bothered to have a conversation about such if it doesn't include some type of forced roleplay.

I'm not sure if any other ladies have the same issue, but these are just a few of the issues I have run into with men who have tried to talk to me through this site. And generally, I don't respond to threads such as these. But I, for one, am tired of seeing "Where the ladies at?" followed by a post indicating that most of us are either fake or shy or not interested in men.

I was not meaning to attack the OP, and I am sorry if I did. But I was just trying to point out that the ladies here have it rough too. Hang in there. You'll find someone to chat with soon.
Click to expand...

This is a really fucking awesome post! Had me actually laughing out loud with "I wants to tikle ur feet".

That reminds me of the famous Hall of Shame thread on here.
 
Candygirl said:

....Lastly, you JUST said earlier that you had to "rule out" certain types of women to weed through and find the ones who meet the criteria of the type you are looking for. AND I QUOTE "...Also, of the women who are active on the forum, once you take out the ones who are only interested in girls, or are in a monogamous relationship with a guy, or are clearly fake, then you're left with almost no one."
So am I to assume that since you stated that I can't rule out the kinds of guys I described unless I actually talked to them to do so, that means that YOU, in turn, have actually talked to all the girls on the site as well to come to your assessments?
Click to expand...

I agree with everything you wrote - I started here young enough, over 28, and took some foolish risks, but I really don't blame the younger women for hiding between the crazy comments and attitudes. I put up this profile just to try to meet someone for a platonic session with no strings, and I was swamped, it does get scary fast. Some guys also don't let up, they keep pushing, I chatted online with a few who I quickly realized I would never meet, they were really extreme. I was lucky they were so obviously crazy before I thought about meeting them.

So it's too much of a risk, though I've met a few from this site long ago, there are some genuinely nice normal men & women here too. I would just not tell someone it's safe to meet strangers, and I'd hope women especially would wait until they're older and more streetsmart if they're going to meet anyone.

Even then I can't say it's a good idea, you can meet a killer and not know it. If someone pushes too hard, forget it, but you can't always tell, this is the problem. The pushy guy could be harmless and just socially lacking & the charming guy who sounds really nice could be Ted Bundy, you don't know until you meet & even taking precautions may not be enough if the guy's crazy.

So people should be more understanding. Between people who misrepresent themselves to those who might meet them (some just do that to protect themselves, others do it for weird reasons.. And there are too many of those...) and those who are just criminally insane, I again wouldn't suggest *anyone meet someone from a fetish site and certainly not anyone under 30 :p)
 
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I think it's a valid point to say, that we the users create our own issues, I'm a young college age guy, and I haven't met many my age, but I'm also not looking for a quick fix or even relationship or tickle partners. If people just stopped trying to solely use guys or girls as just a toy for their sexual need, there's a possible chance we'd find more of what were looking, but as we all know its the Internet.
 
i used to be super active here, but i left because the men are predatory as fuck. :sigh:
 
i'm herrreee . and not a man. and not old. even though i had a break down over turning 23.
 
I'm a 21 year old lee :) I know I'm not attractive, but I'm young, real and very ticklish hehe ; p
 
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