My 2 cents
This isnt aimed at anyone, but just a few things to consider and a bit of advice from someone whos active in the UK tickle scene.
I feel that a lot of people forget that no one owes them a reply to their comments, personal ads and messages. Whoever you are, whatever role or gender, no one has to reply to you on any platform. People come here and to other platforms for their own reasons and not specifically to reply to personal ads.
I get that its disheartening to those who are looking and get no reply, but thats what happens for many reasons. Ranging from people not actually looking for new play partners/already having their own thing set up, to just being curious and having a look, to read stories or role play. Some just go online to look at the pics and vids and have no intention of ever meeting people for this stuff and dont even look at ads or messages. Some may have already looked at your ad and found what you wrote doesnt match what they are after, some may just not like how you sell yourself, it could be a whole range of reasons. Especially with it already being said that there are way more males than females in this game.
Same with the professionals that do this sort of thing for money. Just because they do it, doesnt mean they are taking anyone and everyones money. They have a right to choose who they pick to be vulnerable with. I mean whether paid or unpaid sessions, people need to make sure that they feel safe and comfortable with people and if they dont feel that or get a bad vibe, then its not gonna happen. If youre not coming across respectful and selling yourself well as someone who is safe and can offer what the other person wants, whether money, certain styles of tickling, restraint, no sexual contact, a whole variety of things, youre not going to get looked at. So many look at it from their side and forget that it should be a mutual agreement.
As a male ler from the UK, I do find there are more tickle people down South than up North where I am. Has that stopped me? No. There are times I dont get replies, times things just dont work out, times where our energies dont match and you know what, thats completely fine. No issue, no dramas, it is what it is. Same as Ive not replied to messages, be the one to turn a play offer down, if it doesnt feel right.
Some will class me as one of the "men who hoard all the spoils for themselves" or the toxic “alpha male” type (borrowing quotes for context, not calling anyone out
) as Ive been more than successful than most male lers in the UK tickle scene. Ive had similar said to me by various people over the time I have been active on the scene. But you know what, Ive not done anything that no one else can achieve and its certainly no secret to how Ive done it. No rigged games, no hoarding people for myself as each and every person Ive had the pleasure of tickling, has been free to meet anyone they feel they want to meet. I just put myself out there, being an active member of the community online, posting/joining discussions, whether on forums or chat rooms, attended events on Fetlife (none tickle related events more often than not) and made lots of new friends along the way, with no pressure or expectations to meet them for tickle fun. Building up a reputation for myself over the years and when talks of tickle fun have been brought up, made sure its a mutual exchange and not just me expecting them to attend to what I want with no talk of what they want out of it. Personally I dont pay for sessions (nothing against those that do) but what I do do is put towards travel/venue/accomodation costs. Those that travel to me, Ill offer accommodation, food, contribute towards travel costs. Thats made many life long amazing friends, in the UK and around the world and many tickle opportunities.
Even sharing what I wrote above, many just want it here and now. A quick fix, a solution to get what they want, sooner rather than later. Not realising it can take time or being patient. That and their rushing actions tarnish themselves with a negative reputation, a red flag. As I said at the start, if you dont sell yourself well, youre not going to get far with anyone. People talk in the tickle community and if your actions arent respectful and giving off safe vibes, people will talk about you and will avoid you.
The UK tickle scene is building so much right now. There are more and more events happening that are open to all people. Whether social or play events, this is the time for UK tickle lovers to put themselves out there more! Whether youre after socials, theres the London Tickle Munch, Northen Tickle Munch to name a few, play events such as SQUEAL! Tickle Torture @Townhouse, Hysteria @Xtasia, TICKLEMANIA @The Facility and even Reed Amber has been running events in London, which Im sure @Jezebel Lee can confirm are a fun time! Plus many other cool people out there are offering paid sessions. People who are genuinely ticklish/into tickling and actually enjoy it and looking for tickle sessions, as apposed to those who do it thinking its a quick cash cow. Theres even a UK tickle discord group full of many awesome people! There litterally is no excuse for people not to be out there in the UK right now! You can even set something up yourself!
Just remember no one owes you anything, sell yourself well, put yourself out there and take your time. Keeping those things in mind and youre going to have a lot more success.
This isnt aimed at anyone, but just a few things to consider and a bit of advice from someone whos active in the UK tickle scene.
I feel that a lot of people forget that no one owes them a reply to their comments, personal ads and messages. Whoever you are, whatever role or gender, no one has to reply to you on any platform. People come here and to other platforms for their own reasons and not specifically to reply to personal ads.
I get that its disheartening to those who are looking and get no reply, but thats what happens for many reasons. Ranging from people not actually looking for new play partners/already having their own thing set up, to just being curious and having a look, to read stories or role play. Some just go online to look at the pics and vids and have no intention of ever meeting people for this stuff and dont even look at ads or messages. Some may have already looked at your ad and found what you wrote doesnt match what they are after, some may just not like how you sell yourself, it could be a whole range of reasons. Especially with it already being said that there are way more males than females in this game.
Same with the professionals that do this sort of thing for money. Just because they do it, doesnt mean they are taking anyone and everyones money. They have a right to choose who they pick to be vulnerable with. I mean whether paid or unpaid sessions, people need to make sure that they feel safe and comfortable with people and if they dont feel that or get a bad vibe, then its not gonna happen. If youre not coming across respectful and selling yourself well as someone who is safe and can offer what the other person wants, whether money, certain styles of tickling, restraint, no sexual contact, a whole variety of things, youre not going to get looked at. So many look at it from their side and forget that it should be a mutual agreement.
As a male ler from the UK, I do find there are more tickle people down South than up North where I am. Has that stopped me? No. There are times I dont get replies, times things just dont work out, times where our energies dont match and you know what, thats completely fine. No issue, no dramas, it is what it is. Same as Ive not replied to messages, be the one to turn a play offer down, if it doesnt feel right.
Some will class me as one of the "men who hoard all the spoils for themselves" or the toxic “alpha male” type (borrowing quotes for context, not calling anyone out
) as Ive been more than successful than most male lers in the UK tickle scene. Ive had similar said to me by various people over the time I have been active on the scene. But you know what, Ive not done anything that no one else can achieve and its certainly no secret to how Ive done it. No rigged games, no hoarding people for myself as each and every person Ive had the pleasure of tickling, has been free to meet anyone they feel they want to meet. I just put myself out there, being an active member of the community online, posting/joining discussions, whether on forums or chat rooms, attended events on Fetlife (none tickle related events more often than not) and made lots of new friends along the way, with no pressure or expectations to meet them for tickle fun. Building up a reputation for myself over the years and when talks of tickle fun have been brought up, made sure its a mutual exchange and not just me expecting them to attend to what I want with no talk of what they want out of it. Personally I dont pay for sessions (nothing against those that do) but what I do do is put towards travel/venue/accomodation costs. Those that travel to me, Ill offer accommodation, food, contribute towards travel costs. Thats made many life long amazing friends, in the UK and around the world and many tickle opportunities.Even sharing what I wrote above, many just want it here and now. A quick fix, a solution to get what they want, sooner rather than later. Not realising it can take time or being patient. That and their rushing actions tarnish themselves with a negative reputation, a red flag. As I said at the start, if you dont sell yourself well, youre not going to get far with anyone. People talk in the tickle community and if your actions arent respectful and giving off safe vibes, people will talk about you and will avoid you.
The UK tickle scene is building so much right now. There are more and more events happening that are open to all people. Whether social or play events, this is the time for UK tickle lovers to put themselves out there more! Whether youre after socials, theres the London Tickle Munch, Northen Tickle Munch to name a few, play events such as SQUEAL! Tickle Torture @Townhouse, Hysteria @Xtasia, TICKLEMANIA @The Facility and even Reed Amber has been running events in London, which Im sure @Jezebel Lee can confirm are a fun time! Plus many other cool people out there are offering paid sessions. People who are genuinely ticklish/into tickling and actually enjoy it and looking for tickle sessions, as apposed to those who do it thinking its a quick cash cow. Theres even a UK tickle discord group full of many awesome people! There litterally is no excuse for people not to be out there in the UK right now! You can even set something up yourself!
Just remember no one owes you anything, sell yourself well, put yourself out there and take your time. Keeping those things in mind and youre going to have a lot more success.
