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"Everything happens for a reason": Truth or Cop-Out

S

Skipadeedoodah

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Some people always are always saying "everything happens for a reason" when stuff goes wrong in their life. If they don't get the apartment they wanted or they can in a minor car accident...they get fired from a job or someone steals money...they always sooth themselves by saying "everything happens for a reason."

Here's my question - do YOU think that's true? Or do you think sometimes bad things just happen with no rhyme or reason?

Do you think people who say that believe it or are just looking for a way to cop-out of their responsibility and not admit that they screwed up?
 
It's kind of a cop-out

Skipadeedoodah said:
Some people always are always saying "everything happens for a reason" when stuff goes wrong in their life. If they don't get the apartment they wanted or they can in a minor car accident...they get fired from a job or someone steals money...they always sooth themselves by saying "everything happens for a reason."

Here's my question - do YOU think that's true? Or do you think sometimes bad things just happen with no rhyme or reason?

Do you think people who say that believe it or are just looking for a way to cop-out of their responsibility and not admit that they screwed up?
Click to expand...

Some things happen for no reason at all, and that's scary to a lot of people. They prefer to think there's some plan, some logic, some way to figure out why any circumstance happened, but chaos is an undeniable (and necessary) part of the universe.
 
Deterministically, yes. Events have precipitating factors.

With regard to meaning or grand plans, no. We attribute to events what meanings we believe are there, even when there are none, and sometimes even when the reason intended by someone setting an event in motion is completely counter to what one's own believed "reason" for the event is. We embrace illusion because we seek meaning. This isn't to say that illusion has no value. I believe people are happier upon seeing patterns (even illusory ones) that suggest meaning to them, and derive greater satisfaction from life if they feel that things have reasons and therefore try to take positive lessons from them.

To use it as a cop-out for one's own behavior sounds more like a fatalistic, "Shit Happens" attitude, which is a whole other kettle of fish.
 
i belever things happen for a reason well in my experiences anyways something would happen then something good would come out of that but that is not always the case with everyone that is what my experianeces have been
 
Things in my life have a way of working out. I don't take the "everything happens for a reason" phrase literally, but for me at least, I do subscribe to "things eventually have a way of working themselves out." For example, I was fired in the spring 2007. I was devastated. I went back to grad school, happened to be outside a professor's office after he got an email about a job opening, and now I have another job that has been transforming closer to my ideal job every year. Had I moved out of NYC for a job, which I had strongly considered, I would never have delurked on the TMF the way I did, and would never have met the awesome people I did. So getting fired, while completely sucking for a year, ended up working out for me.

When something truly awful happens, like death, I don't think there's a reason. I have a hard time believing there's some kind of higher power working all these things out. In that case, yes, "shit happens."
 
I think things do always happen for a reason...but not in a comforting, some-higher-power-loves-me-very-much kind of way. That's the psychological equivalent of wrapping yourself in a blankie and sucking your thumb. But every effect has a cause. If you want bad things to stop happening to you, you should stop doing stupid things. 😀
 
Every thing happens due to a reason. But that is just probabilistic mechanics.

Taking the statement that things happen because some guiding hand is balancing out the universe by sprinkling reward and punishment upon those that have earned them. Then No. The universe doesn't give a damn about us. Stuff happens as a result of probabilities stacking up based on our actions, others actions, and the mechanics of the physical world.

The good are not rewarded, nor the bad punished, by hands other then our own.

Myriads
 
Fangz said:
Truth or cop out? It's both IMO! :smokingiscool:
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This.

I feel that while things often do happen for a reason, too many people use that theory as a cop-out to explain a situation that's either ultimately good or ultimately bad.
 
Some things do happen for a reason. Your lights don't work because you forgot to pay your bills is an example of this. But I think a lot of things in life are very random, with no reason at all, but like religion, karma, and so on, the "everything happens for a reason" mentality is basically just bullshit to make people feel more comfortable, I think.
 
Everything happens for "reasons". Cause and effect and all that.
However, people use the saying to attribute some meaning or purpose for the reason, which I see no need to do.

So, both. 😀
 
Interesting question to which i am sure there will be two distinct answers. Yes and No. Yes answers from people who have had things work out for them in life. No answers from people who have been, for lack of better terminology, shit on in life.

As for me. Strictly speaking everything does happen for a reason. Cause and effect as has been said. Things happening as some pre-determined reason set forth way back in time. Well, let's just say i tend not to dwell on shit i can't change. Don't do much thinking on stuff past that.
 
I think you can apply reasons to any situation to make them seem in your favor one way or another. So in that, the statement is probably true because you will it to be true. If you felt that nothing ever worked out in your favor and the statement was b.s., then you have willed it so for yourself.
 
"everything happens for a reason" is another way of saying, "i have nothing to add to this conversation"
 
I believe that the world is cruel and random. But that's just me. I admire people who hold a faith that the stars are aligned. Actually, I admire anyone who has faith in anything.
 
i don't believe in deities or the supernatural, so i don't believe that any god is guiding us. however, i believe in the interconnected of all things. each decision i make becomes the basis for my next decision. because of our interconnectedness, decisions that others make can also affect my life. if each decision i make becomes the basis for the next, i am radically free in that i can change my life at any time. the trick is being able and willing to embrace the change and fear of the unknown needed to move out of the status quo. at the same time, because the decisions of others affect me, i am not completely free of outside influences. radical freedom comes in knowing that it isn't so much what happens or fails to happen as much as how i interpret those actions and how i choose to proceed. rather than saying 'everything happens for a reason,' i'm more likely to say that i respond to what happens for a reason based on my life experiences and previous decisions.
 
Much like Christianity (or any other religion, now that I think about it), saying "everything happens for a reason" is right up there with "God/dess works in mysterious ways" or "There's a purpose for me, whether I know it or not." It's simply a mechanic that weak-minded people use to feel as though they do not need to take responsibility for a stiuation, or, in the case of something unfortunate that happens to someone which is beyond their control, it's a way to make you feel better about yourself since you're not strong enough in character to accept the fact that sometimes, life just fuckin sucks.
 
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sasaxrah said:
When something truly awful happens, like death, I don't think there's a reason. I have a hard time believing there's some kind of higher power working all these things out. In that case, yes, "shit happens."
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That's what i think.. many things do happen for a reason, like personal experiences which we can learn from. But on the other hand.. people or kids dying cause they dont have enough food or all those tragic things.. doesn't make sense that there's a reason behind that.
 
Moved:

I've been legally separated from my spouse for almost over a year now.

Now, suddenly, out of the blue, my old ex-boyfriend [[The One True Love, I'm sure you're familiar with them?]] has popped up and he too is having serious marital issues.

We've been talking here and there, but nothing serious has happened. But I just can't help but wonder, you know.. is there a reason that this has happened? It can't be just coincidence..

Or I'm just overtly stressed out lately and my brain is frying. :crazy:
 
Last week i gave an elderly woman a beat down and took her purse. had the money to buy a sweet LCD TV. see, everything does have a reason. :laughhard:
 
Honestly, I think it's one of those phrases people use so they don't drive themselves crazy blaming themselves for what went wrong or wondering if they had done something different.
 
Capnmad said:
I believe people are happier upon seeing patterns (even illusory ones) that suggest meaning to them, and derive greater satisfaction from life if they feel that things have reasons and therefore try to take positive lessons from them.
Click to expand...

For many people, it would require too much emotional and intellectual equity to delve deeper into matters...

Oh, and hello, my friend. Haven't spoken in a while, hope all's well with you 🙂
 
As has been stated several times, in terms of causality, everything does happen for a reason.
But when used to support ideas of faith, fate, destiny, religion and such, I view such statements as utterly pointless.
 
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