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unit5610

2nd Level Orange Feather
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May 17, 2005
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Seems like the week for family losses here...
After an 11 year battle with Alzheimer's disease, my mom passed away this morning at age 85. This time period has been one of sadness, seeing her slowly lose her ability to live life as we know it. It has been marked by difficult family circumstances and strong disagreements at times. But it also has feature inspiring devotion and caring, particularly from my dad (they had been married 60 years) who made the 40 mile round trip to the nursing home to feed her lunch and walk her outside in her wheelchair almost every day for the last 4 years. His effort and devotion kept her alive for many months longer than would have otherwise been the case, and this aspect of it will be with me always.
I was fortunate enough to visit there there yesterday, her last full day. I knew the end was near as her breathing was labored as I pushed her around the block on a chilly but beautiful winter day.
In spite of the fact that there has been little recognition and that she hasn't been able to really speak in about 7 years, it is still a great loss knowing she's no longer with us. Caring for my dad, who remains in great shape at 84, is a big priority. He's been so focused on mom for so long that this will be a challenge, by my being in school instead of working gives me some flexibility.
Thanks for listening!
 
My condolences to you and your family, Unit, on your mother's passing. :( She may be gone now, but at least she lived a good long life before the Alzheimer's disease struck, and had a husband as loving as your father to take care of her when she could no longer take care of herself. I can't imagine what he's going through right now, but I wish him all the best, and you and your other loved ones as well. All parents should be as devoted to each other as yours were. Take care, Unit, and know that we are here for you if you need us. :grouphug: :)
 
I want to add my condolences. I'm sure nothing anyone can say would lessen your pain.

I'm glad your mom and dad had each other. I hope your dad will find happiness again. I think they're lucky to have you, a son that cares about his parents.
 
I am so sorry honey. May you and your family find peace. Alzheimer's is an awful way to die. :smilelove
XOXO
 
May she rest in peace Unit....sounds like you have a good strong family with a lot of love going on.....

Ray
 
My grandmother died about 15 years ago from Alzheimers. It was an awful sight the last 2 or 3 years of her life. The hardest for me is that she died when I was overseas serving in Iraq during Persian Gulf 1. For some odd reason I was one of the few names she remembered in her last stages (I was her favorite grandson, I went to church with her every Sunday from the ages of 5 until 16)
and when she passed she asked for me and they told her where I was and she simply said she was so proud of me and held on to a picture of me as she faded away surrounded by rest of the family. I went to her grave when I came back and I honestly to this day never cried that much before or since. I still every year on her birthday send flowers for her grave and light a candle at the local Catholic Church. Not that I go frequently to Church, but my grandmother was a devout Roman Catholic and I do it as a tribute to her.

I hope you get through this...and be at peace knowing she isnt suffering anymore.

Rob
 
I am saddened by your loss Unit. But now she is not suffering anymore and she is definately in a better place with our Lord. May she have peace in her and may you find peace in yours. Again I am sorry. If there is anything Sadira and I can do please PM us and let us know.

Your friends always.
 
dear sweet Unit. i just read this. i am so sorry hon, for your loss of your mom. wow what a dad. he sounds so great and devoted. ahh he will miss her. of course you are still saddened even though the mom you knew had already gone before the worst of this disease hit her. after all she is your mom. i wont be redundant and say she lived a full long life. and that now she is happy and free of pain. this you already knew. i will only say that my thoughts are with you and i am only a pm away if ever you need me. remember i know what its like to lose parents.

isabeau xoxoxo :Kiss2:
 
Unit, Iam very sorry to hear about your mother's passing, my friend. I offer you my deepest sympathties. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

Mitch
 
Having a father with dementia, I can sooo relate to what you're going through right now. It's sad to watch them slip away bit by bit and feeling helpless to do anything about it. May she rest in peace and may you get some well-deserved rest.
 
While I have a second I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for all of your replies and thoughts. It's a whirlwind of activity right now since the timing of my mom's passing was unexpected but things will settle down after Monday and I can make a better acknowledgement. Meanwhile thanks again...you guys are awesome and I so appreciate all of the support from this great community!
 
Condolences, Unit. I went through that back in May.

I need to go see dad...thanks for the reminder.
 


I'm so sorry unit. The loss of a parent is something we dread through our whole lives, and when their time comes I can only imagine how tragic the loss truly is. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers, and my door is always open if you need someone to talk to. :cuddle:
 
I'm so sorry to hear about your mother Unit. If you need to talk, you know where to find me.

Sandee
 
Thanks again guys...your support has been wonderful. This has actually brought our family closer together this week (we'll see how long THAT lasts!) as we've shared lots of stories and hopefully put some major points of contention behind us. You guys are the best!

Unit
 
Unit, I am So sorry to hear about your mothers passing and from your words it is true that she will be missed . I know this is going to be a hard time for you and your father too,remember her on her happiest days,the memories you have shared with her and know that her suffering has ended and I am sure she is in a better place.. It seems that you were strong spending her last day with her ,my thoughts,prayers are with you and your family..
Please know that I am a PM away if you need me ;) :grouphug: :twohugs:
 
Sorry to hear about your mom passing, Unit. We'll keep you and your family in our prayers.


Drew
 
Thoughts and Prayers Unit, and to everyone else who has lost a parent or loved one, including myself. My father died of cancer, my mother just had surgery to remove a tumor.

As kids we think our parents are going to live forever.

Wow that hurts.
 
Unit I am sooooo sorry to read this. My heart goes out to you and your family. My uncle passed away with it also. It was my mom's brother and she spent alot of time taking care of him until he got to the point where she couldn't anymore. Watching him deteriorate was extremely difficult so I definitely understand what you went through. My thoughts are with you and I am here if you want to talk. Sending you a comforting hug.
 
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