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Can a Guy and a Girl be Just Friends?

S

Skipadeedoodah

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So, some recent events in my life, plus a quote from the gorgeous Kate Hudson, inspired me to create this thread.

Can a guy and girl be just friends?? My initial answer is yes of course they can. Just because two people happen to be members of the opposite sex (assuming heterosexuality here strictly to keep things simple) doesn't mean that they can't maintain a platonic relationship.

Then I read this interview with Kate Hudson, and this is one of the questions asked of her. Her answer is something to the effect of...."A man and a woman can maintain a friendly relationship -- yes. But there's always going to be one or othe other of them who's willing to throw down. So in that aspect, no they can't be just friends."

That got me thinking, and rocked my boat a little bit, because of the guys that I'm "just friends" with, if they and I were single, I can't say I wouldn't "throw down" (I love Kate Hudson LOL) with a few of them 😛

What do ya'll think??
 
Can a guy and a girl be "just friends"? Sure. Over the course of my life I've been rather good friends with several girls. Would I have slept with any of them if the circumstances were aligned right? I dunno. Once you get to know them too well, you can kind of see their various issues, which bringing sex into the equasion between the two of you will make things too complex between you.
I hope I made some sense? Sometimes its just easier to be platonic friends.

Besides, none of my girl friends ever said they wanted to have sex with me, so I guess the whole point is moot (in my case). :dropatear
 
My best friend is a lady I knew from Junior High School. For the last 30 odd years we can still tell anything to each other. So I would say it can happen that a guy and girl can have a tight plutonic relationship.
 
hudson isnt entirely accurate there, there isnt ALWAYS someone willing to throw down, every situations different, Many of my girl mates are very attractive and typically my type but I wouldnt do anything with any of them because of the friendship, and many of them have said they feel the same way, which is a nice comrfort for each of us.

Now the thing is, had I met any of them under different circumstances...things may have been different, but once the friendship has built up..its hard to think anything more into it so I just dont.

So my answer to the question is this:

A guy and a girl upon meeting could become anything, be it just friends or otherwise, the rain drops of life fall and maybe youl get wet, then again you may have a suitable unbrella. some people are unbrella people and some people arnt, two umbrella people will happily just be friends, but if one person isnt..then they will want to share... and sharing unbrellas rarely goes well unless youve got one of those REALLY large ones, for it to really be fair and work...you need to do away with unbrellas and get wet together 😉

as with everything theres no rules, depends on the people involved, but the simple answer is yes of course they can, if thats what they both want.



rabble rabble 😛
 
I think it's fully possible. Some of my best friends throughout my life have been male. Especially since in my line of work there are way more males then females.

Really it comes down to the people. If they want to do something well maybe eventually something will happen, but usually both are satisfied as being platonic friends, or so I've seen.

Also if people are good friends its hard a lot of the time to go back to being friends if something happens. That's why it's often good to just be friends to begin with and not challenge that relationship.
 
the answer is no way, because somebody in the "friendship" is romantically courting the other person.

men and women are so different... what do they have to offer each other in a "just friends" labeled relationship.
 
Well, as a fan of the Ladder Theory, no.

I have either already slept with the female friends I currently have or I do not find them attractive enough to sleep with. The reason I'm not currently sleeping with them is because I have someone who is on a higher position on my ladder.
 
Skipadeedoodah said:
So, some recent events in my life, plus a quote from the gorgeous Kate Hudson, inspired me to create this thread.

Can a guy and girl be just friends?? My initial answer is yes of course they can. Just because two people happen to be members of the opposite sex (assuming heterosexuality here strictly to keep things simple) doesn't mean that they can't maintain a platonic relationship.

What do ya'll think??
Click to expand...

😀
:blaugh:
:manicd:
:jester:
:rowfull:
:roflmao:

Stop it! You're killing me! I can't stands no more!

Okay, but in all seriousness, I'm probably the LAST person who should answer this question (for a multitude of reasons).

But...

Two straight people of opposite sex... just friends...?

I'll bet the favorite [being NO] heavy on that one.

I think the odds are at least 100:1 if Vegas ever had a say.

If nothing else can we all agree that even if they 'stay friends' that the hypothetical 'friends' in question will eventually have sex together?

The probablility would be over 50%, IMO.

But again... what do I know? I'm a total hermit.
 
Absolutely, without a doubt yes.

Those that don't think it's possible are always going to give others a hard time about it. Just shrug 'em off.
 
Skipadeedoodah said:
So, some recent events in my life, plus a quote from the gorgeous Kate Hudson, inspired me to create this thread.

Can a guy and girl be just friends?? My initial answer is yes of course they can. Just because two people happen to be members of the opposite sex (assuming heterosexuality here strictly to keep things simple) doesn't mean that they can't maintain a platonic relationship.

Then I read this interview with Kate Hudson, and this is one of the questions asked of her. Her answer is something to the effect of...."A man and a woman can maintain a friendly relationship -- yes. But there's always going to be one or othe other of them who's willing to throw down. So in that aspect, no they can't be just friends."

That got me thinking, and rocked my boat a little bit, because of the guys that I'm "just friends" with, if they and I were single, I can't say I wouldn't "throw down" (I love Kate Hudson LOL) with a few of them 😛

What do ya'll think??
Click to expand...

Skipadeedoodah said:
I'm glad ya'll feel this way...'zactly the answers I was hoping for 😀
Click to expand...
I'm glad you're glad, but it is what is regardless what people think, including Kate Hudson. Because she is famous doesn't make her a relationship expert or a psychologist, in fact she has sure been through her up and downs in her personal life and divorce. In fact she admitted not two days ago in an entertainment interview that she has always been in relationships since she turned 17 and that she does better in long term relationships then not. So maybe SHE is that person in her own descriptions that is looking to throw down. Does any of that change the answer, maybe, maybe not. It's just food for thought.

Now on to my take on it. Yes I think without a doubt that they can be friends. The very idea that they have feelings that COULD move to something more IF they both decided to, could be nothing more than the fact that people that are close friends, are such because they really admire the qualities the other person possesses, and isn't that what we base relationships on to begin with? But can they both be just friends? Of course, as pointed out by people above me.

I had a female friend through out highschool and after and we hung out ALL the time. And to this day we can go loooong stretches not seeing each other and ALWAYS pick up right where we left off. She was always cute, and super fun to be around, but it was just nothing more than that.

Contrary to what some people think, you CAN love somebody and not pursue something because it's not to be, not in their best interest, or just out of respect. Unconditional love for people happens regardless of whether it fits into the little tiny box that is other peoples minds. 😀
 
CrystalLight said:
omg. :roflmao:

They even have pie charts!!
Click to expand...

uhuh 😀

well it's basically that men only put a person on their list based on how much they'd like to have sex with them. The reason why they do not want to have sex with someone is because either she's wolf ugly or he's already banging someone who's higher up his list or because he's trying to get between the legs of someone who's higher up on his list and having sex with some other woman screws up his plans.

Whereas women also have a friends list of guys who they would not want to have sex with but whose company they enjoy. The Friends list. And the men on the Friends list really would like have sex with her but they aint getting any, which is very sad for them.
 
Mephistopheles said:
uhuh 😀

well it's basically that men only put a person on their list based on how much they'd like to have sex with them. The reason why they do not want to have sex with someone is because either she's wolf ugly or he's already banging someone who's higher up his list or because he's trying to get between the legs of someone who's higher up on his list and having sex with some other woman screws up his plans.

Whereas women also have a friends list of guys who they would not want to have sex with but whose company they enjoy. The Friends list. And the men on the Friends list really would like have sex with her but they aint getting any, which is very sad for them.
Click to expand...

Unfortunately, I totally agree with this, lol.:couch:

My honest answer? No. Maybe....well, I dunno.

I do have male friends who I feel I can tell anything to, and I really appreciate them for that. I may have some feelings for them, but I respect them too much to actually say anything or bring it to that level.

On the other hand, I do have some male "friends"(quotations for effect) with whom I KNOW they only want one thing. They are pretty much the men who Meph listed in his post. At this point in our "friendship" I'm on the list because I'm f*ckable, plain and simple. These guys pretend to be my friend, and listen to my problems, and then proceed to say something like, "Hey, why don't we have lunch or something?"..........guess where they wanna end up?

So......my real answer....depends on the woman and the man.

Damn, that made sense in my head.:disgust:

--T
 
KrazieDog said:
I'm glad you're glad, but it is what is regardless what people think, including Kate Hudson. Because she is famous doesn't make her a relationship expert or a psychologist, in fact she has sure been through her up and downs in her personal life and divorce. In fact she admitted not two days ago in an entertainment interview that she has always been in relationships since she turned 17 and that she does better in long term relationships then not. So maybe SHE is that person in her own descriptions that is looking to throw down. Does any of that change the answer, maybe, maybe not. It's just food for thought.
Click to expand...

I wasn't saying that her opinion meant more than anyone else's just cause she's a celebrity. It was the comment that caught my attention - not who said it. 🙂

KrazieDog said:
Now on to my take on it. Yes I think without a doubt that they can be friends. The very idea that they have feelings that COULD move to something more IF they both decided to, could be nothing more than the fact that people that are close friends, are such because they really admire the qualities the other person possesses, and isn't that what we base relationships on to begin with? But can they both be just friends? Of course, as pointed out by people above me.

I had a female friend through out highschool and after and we hung out ALL the time. And to this day we can go loooong stretches not seeing each other and ALWAYS pick up right where we left off. She was always cute, and super fun to be around, but it was just nothing more than that.

Contrary to what some people think, you CAN love somebody and not pursue something because it's not to be, not in their best interest, or just out of respect. Unconditional love for people happens regardless of whether it fits into the little tiny box that is other peoples minds. 😀
Click to expand...

I agree 🙂
 
None of my girl friends want to have sex with me.

I feel as lonely and unloveable as Cy/MiG...
 
yeah i think it is possible. my best friend is a girl i knew from high school. the first girl, or even person for that matter, who ever spoke to me. we've been friends going on 20 years now and, like kered's girl, i can tell her anything and there's nothing she doesn't know about me. so there ya have it.
 
It's possible to be friends.

I would say it's not healthy to be BFF with the opposite sex if there's an attraction. In that case it's like you're in a relationship with no sex, and one party is unfairly benefiting.
 
What Kate Hudson thinks doesn't rule the world. (Side thought: If celeb mentality ruled the world...?! Yikes!)

Ahem, anywhooo.... I have several friends who happen to be guys. I'm very close with some of them. But, I have no interest in anything beyond friendship. I'm fairly certain that none of them do either. So much for the worldly wisdom of Kate. :manicd:
 
The Ladder theory was great! People (women) may say it's a bunch of crap, but if you think about it, it DOES happen. If it didn't, then how would the guy come up with the entire theory if there is no degree of truth to it?

As for "friends". You know, I will not say it is impossible, but it is HARD for a guy and girl to be just "friends". Think about it. If that person is your "friend", they exhibit qualities that you like. If they are physically attractive, even a little bit, feeling can develop, since when we "supposedly" look for relationships, we look for the same types of qualities our friends have. At least ONE of the parties will develop feelings. They just won't say or act on any feelings.

To the women who say "I have lots of guy friends and we would NEVER do anything to jeopardize the friendship" type sentiments, have you ever thought that the guy DOES LIKE YOU, but he will not say anything because it will destroy the friendship? If he senses that you do not like him that way, he may NEVER say anything or just flat out deny it. Because he is just happy to be around you, even if his greatest desire doesn't come to fruition. So you may THINK he doesn't have feelings, but he MAY have them. Yes, really. Same with guys. Your best female friend may actually have feelings, but will not say anything, maybe even deny any feelings. Since we can't read specifically what is on other people's minds, how would you ever REALLY know?

Now the question is, what kind of friends are we talking about. The whole question gets thrown out if you're just "work friends". Is the question posed to those who have "close" relationships with the opposite sex?
 
I have so many close friendships with women, without sexual chemistry, that I can answer the question quite definitively. Then again, I can only speak for myself, and I'm not quite the image of the alpha male. Hey Maniac Tickler, what do you think?
 
Tamia78 said:
On the other hand, I do have some male "friends"(quotations for effect) with whom I KNOW they only want one thing.
Click to expand...

Sup 😀


Yeah, I dunno. I think men and women CAN be "just friends"; I know a few women who I consider friends who I don't necessarily desire to have sex with (though I wouldn't say no if they asked, I am, after all, male). I also think that in friendships between a man and a woman where there's sexual tension there's also a little less closeness; you tend to be more guarded around people you actively want to have sex with, or at least I do, but the trade off is it's always a little bit more... I dunno, exciting, being around a female friend like that. Or a male one.


Or a particularly attractive barnyard animal.



I have issues.
 
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