Can a Guy and a Girl be Just Friends?

[badreligion]

I say yes

 

[McNoodle]

I believe a man and a woman can definitely be platonic friends. Sometimes the feelings will evolve into something different for one or both parties. I have a couple female friends whom I think the world of but they are like sisters to me and shall forever remain so.

 

[maniactickler]

I can easily be just friends with a woman, but i still need to be attracted to her. im shallow, i like being around good looking women. what can i say.

 

[Skipadeedoodah]

What Kate Hudson thinks doesn't rule the world. (Side thought: If celeb mentality ruled the world...?! Yikes!)

Ahem, anywhooo.... I have several friends who happen to be guys. I'm very close with some of them. But, I have no interest in anything beyond friendship. I'm fairly certain that none of them do either. So much for the worldly wisdom of Kate.

Again...it was the comment that caught my eye..not the person who said it. Had it been a comment from an entirely anonymous source, it still would have piqued my interest...

I'm not shallow enough to think just because someone is famous they're also a genius....

 

[ticklee_heather]

I think a guy and girl can be just friends but it really depends on the situation. I don't like to go hang out with most of my guy friends by ourselves just because I think it could send them the wrong message. I don't mind meeting them somewhere in public, but I try to steer clear of situations where we could be alone and just the two of us. I think that whenever you spend enough time with anyone feeling are going to develop from either one person, the other, or both. I think it is something that you have to be conscious of if you want to stay just friends. Things like someone interpretting an act of kindness as a show of affection when it is simply done to be nice to them is another problem. I do believe a guy and a girl can both be just friends but it just has to be something both sides are conscious about.

 

[Knot Amewzed]

Again...it was the comment that caught my eye..not the person who said it. Had it been a comment from an entirely anonymous source, it still would have piqued my interest...

I'm not shallow enough to think just because someone is famous they're also a genius....

That would be known as credibility through rhetoric, right Skippy?

 

[Skipadeedoodah]

That would be known as credibility through rhetoric, right Skippy?

You got it love 😉

 

[Knot Amewzed]

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[Raytheon]

Hey folks

For me friendship is too complex to generalize to 'boy' and 'girl'. Its a happy feeling between two people and that happiness comes from anywhere be it from chats on the bus to work to drinks down the pub to fun nights between the sheets. Every friendship is built differently and has its own boundaries which constantly change to suit the bond. The only people who can answer the question are the girl and the boy in the friendship and their answer might be different each time you ask them. Thats how i feel with friendship : )

 

[Adam]

hudson isnt entirely accurate there, there isnt ALWAYS someone willing to throw down, every situations different, Many of my girl mates are very attractive and typically my type but I wouldnt do anything with any of them because of the friendship, and many of them have said they feel the same way, which is a nice comrfort for each of us.

This mirrors my thoughts exactly. For example, I have a good female friend who's a fitness instructor. As you might imagine, she's very attractive. When I first met her, I was definitely interested in her. However, having gotten to know her over time, it became clear to me that we'd make much better friends and nothing more. We even talked about this before and were relieved to have done so. Made us closer. Now she's engaged and I couldn't be happier for her. 🙂

Some guys will always be angling for something more, and there's nothing that can really change that. Not all of us, though.

 

[sasaxrah]

OK, so I know Skippy said heterosexual in the original post. That's cool, but my immediate thought was:

Being bisexual, if I couldn't be just friends with people that I could potentially be attracted to, I would have no friends.

And yes, I have friends of both genders.

 

[slap'n'ticklee]

Sure. I have male friends and we get along brilliantly.

I have a few gay mates (male) and most definately there isn't any sexual yearnings there, but I loves them to bits, they are very supportive and we have a riot.

I've also got straight male friends and we get along just fine, I can say that I have no urges to jump them as they don't me either.

 

[dvnc]

I have friends who are female. Some of them I've known for decades. Everyone's an individual, and every situation is different.

How we maintain our behavior determines our civility, after all. It's REALLY easy to just be base 'bout things. Fun, too, but ALWAYS has unpleasant consequences. I prefer the civil.

 

[venray]

Hmm.... I am now at the age of 54 and can say that throughout most of my life 80 % of my closest friends have been women and still are....

Of course it is possible to be just friends with anyone.....depending upon the type of person you are...

Like Hari said, once the friendship forms it is hard to think of it going anywhere else if you care about the person as a friend to begin with...

 

[Mister Scruff]

Like Hari said, once the friendship forms it is hard to think of it going anywhere else if you care about the person as a friend to begin with...

See, I think this is a bit of a cop out. I can think of few female friends I wouldn't share a merry roll in the hay with if they were up for it, and to be honest I think my relationship with these women is made more... honest? Seems as good a word as any. My relationship with them feels more honest and open by the admission that I find them attractive and that I most definitely WOULD, if the opportunity arose, and I also find it easier to get closer to women I find attractive than those I don't.

Maybe I'm shallow. Maybe that will change as I get older, get married and grow up a bit; but then again for that to be true I'd have to accept that my interest in attractive young women would diminish with age, and I don't think that'll happen >_<

 

[penny lane]

The When Harry Met Sally Syndrome

The answer depends on who you ask.

I agree with Tamia. In my experience, it seems that there are one of two scenarios going on in most close male/female friendships:

1. Both parties harbor secret feelings for one another and are afraid to confess it in case the other doesn't feel the same way and it ruins the friendship.

2. One person feels completely platonic (love-ya-like-a brother/sister) toward the other and would be totally shocked to discover that the other is interested in more than friendship.

I've yet to come across a super-close friendship between a man and a woman where at least ONE person hasn't at least CONSIDERED what it might be like to become romantically involved.

 

[-Hari-]

See, I think this is a bit of a cop out. I can think of few female friends I wouldn't share a merry roll in the hay with if they were up for it, and to be honest I think my relationship with these women is made more... honest? Seems as good a word as any. My relationship with them feels more honest and open by the admission that I find them attractive and that I most definitely WOULD, if the opportunity arose, and I also find it easier to get closer to women I find attractive than those I don't.

Maybe I'm shallow. Maybe that will change as I get older, get married and grow up a bit; but then again for that to be true I'd have to accept that my interest in attractive young women would diminish with age, and I don't think that'll happen >_<

I agree to be honest dude,there are girl mates of mine that I would do "some stuff" with but it depends how far you would go and also as many have said, what type of person you are and what views you have.

I have been known to full on kiss a few of my female friends whilst single, litrally for mutural pleasure, did niether of us us any harm and changed nothing, still friends the next day thinking nothing of it. Altho that is as far as I would be prepared to go but thats me, I guess theres a line for everyone and somepeople cross it, but that line is different for everyone. What im saying tho is tho I have kissed a friend we still are just friends.

So a female and a male can be friends for sure, but whats ok and not ok to do as friends differ from person to person and may or may not be disagreeable to others looking in depending on theyre individual views.

In my opinion you COULD completely risk your friendly relationship with a girl and have full on passionate sex with them, perhaps that would ruin and complicate things beyond repair but also it could be brushed off as a moment of madness and left at that so it doesnt HAVE to change anything.

Three mates of mine, two guys and a girl, were very drunk one night at a festival and had a threesome in a field, this was a year or so ago and they all remember it but think nothing of it, still very good friends, and I still regard them as such. So as with everything "it depends" dam,...you could answer pretty much every thread legitimatly with "it depends" 😛


as a side thought, can 2 guys be just friends? taking into consideration all the points made so far plus the extra sexual preferences this is just as valid a question and pretty much lead to the ultimate question:

Can two human beings be just friends regardless of sexual preference?

 

[Mister Scruff]

In my opinion you COULD completely risk your friendly relationship with a girl and have full on passionate sex with them,

There's a difference between accepting you find someone attractive and actively pursuing a sexual relationship with that person, though.

as a side thought, can 2 guys be just friends? taking into consideration all the points made so far plus the extra sexual preferences this is just as valid a question and pretty much lead to the ultimate question:

Can two human beings be just friends regardless of sexual preference?

Depends on your definition of "friendship" 😀

 

[IwillTickleU]

absolutely it is possible, although I am married i have a few female friends and my wife Kristen understands that because she has guy friends

 

[-Hari-]

There's a difference between accepting you find someone attractive and actively pursuing a sexual relationship with that person, though.

of course there is, and one is abit more complicated than the other but both CAN still not change the fact you are both friends.

Depends on your definition of "friendship" 😀

Just like I said, it depends of each persons views and wont always be agreed with by others but at the end of the day the only opinions that matter are that of the people involved. there are people that would probably tell me that after kissing a female friend they are not more than a friend, but I would still maintain that it isnt true and that we are indeed just friends. and as long as the girl involved agrees with me then there are no further complications and freinds we are.

 

[Icycle]

Why do friendship and sex have to be mutually exclusive? The question sort of assumes that all sex is either with one night stands that you don't care about, or with long term romantic partners. The assumption seems to be that if you have sex with a friend, it will ruin the friendship. I have heard at least anecdotal evidence that it is perfectly possible to have sex with a friend, and still remain just friends.

 

[Illtcklu]

Can a Guy and a Girl be Just Friends?




In a word............ yes!

 

[Myriads]

I'll add to the side of the argument that says:

Why does having sex preclude having a friendship also?

Lots of friends manage it (sex) with no issues. And have great friendships.

Myriads

 

[4Pawz]

I think Myriads hit it on the head there.

I have many many guy friends, who i would never date, and they would never want to date me.

then I have the guy friends i might.

and the ones I can have a "friends with benefits" type relationship.

 

[kis123]

I'll add to the side of the argument that says:

Why does having sex preclude having a friendship also?

Lots of friends manage it (sex) with no issues. And have great friendships.

Myriads

There's no way I can manage such a relationship-wish I could!

Sex is purely an expression of love for me, so I can't do the casual/fwb sex thing. I tried and ended up falling for the guy who reminded me that he didn't have those feelings for me. We became friends, but I never had sex with him again after that.

I'm just not wired for that kind of friendship.