Fetish

[tttony]

Ask around here and you will find many, many more!



I don't. 🙂 Please, check out any article about fetishism you wish, and in every article they will say that we do not know yet how fetishes develop! The only theory there is right now is this one:

Tickling is a fetish, do you at least agree with me on that? and fetishes often comes from things that happened in the childhood, like spanking for example. They might not know exactly why, but they know fetishes come from childhood in most cases.

 

[Korastus]

Why would I be a troll? I am just saying what I think about the whole tickling thing, as I feel a victim of it.

If you honestly felt like a victim, you'd be seeking help or a discussion, not throwing nonsense assumptions around as general rules for people who are largely happy and well-adjusted, content with their kinks. You don't get taken seriously telling strangers on the internet they were all clearly abused because they enjoy something you don't.

 

[ChicagoDavid]

Everyone it being too hard on tttony. He says that tickling ruined his life, that people who have the fetish need therapy, and that he has been talking to people about the origins of their tickle fetish for 15 years.

If all of that is true, then obviously the therapy he has received has not helped, given that he still feels that his life is ruined. Also, it is consuming his life, if he has spent 15 years finding people who have the fetishand asking them about the origin of it. Having said that, I have doubts that he really has done that for 15 years and consistently gotten the answer he describes. People on this forum who have responded to the many threads on “how did your fetish start” have, in the majority, said that they think they were born with it They have no reason to lie in an anonymous forum like this. But I believe that tttony thinks that his fetish originated in this way, and he desperately wants to get away from it.

So, to tttony, I wish you good luck in dealing with your issues. The takeaway from the responses you have received are (a) don’t assume that everyone else spends as much time or mental energy on the fetish as you do, that their fetish originated in the same way, or that their situations are otherwise like yours, and (b) get a different therapist, if you have been getting therapy and still feel like your life is ruined. You can unruin it!

By the way, I’m afraid to ask you your views of homosexuality, so I won’t!

 

[rhiannon]

Tickling is a fetish, do you at least agree with me on that?

Actually if you want to go by the exact definition, then no, it isn't. Fetishes are actually only dead objects, like shoes, diapers, underwear, crap like that, not really an activity.

It for sure is an unusal sexual preference, a so-called paraphilia.

and fetishes often comes from things that happened in the childhood

They can. They don't have to. And even if they do, it doesn't mean someone was being tickled extensively when they were a child. It could just have happened that someone saw it and found it hot. Click. Just like that. Nobody knows why, just like nobody knows why some people find their own sex more attractive than the opposite sex.

 

[tttony]

Yes, I think its very healthy to embrace your fetish, its not good to get obsessed with anything but that's got nothing to do with a fetish, its to do with having an obsessive personality and if an obsessive personaility causes problems then you sort that out by itself, the fetish isn't the problem. If people can't control their desires for things, be it fetishes or drugs etc then they clearly have an issue with self control and its their responcibility to get help for it.

I don't blame the supplier of media that encourages it, drugs are illegal and damage your body so its not that comparable to fetish material, a fetish is perfectly normal and common and the majority of people manage themselves perfectly fine.

Do you realize that what you are effectively doing is telling an entire public forum that their fetish is harmful and caused by trauma etc.... Assumtions and opinions only, not fact, you don't know you're right, in most cases you're probably wrong and you are very likely offending many members of this community.

Whilst you're entitled to your opinion do you really feel ok offending people like that?

Actually my intent is to help people affected by this fetish and maybe make them realize things they never thought about it. It's not my intention to offend anyone. A tickling fetish is, in my opinion, as addicting as drugs, and it damages your body (mind) just the same. Having a fetish, whichever it is, is not a healthy thing.

Like I said earlier this is what I think, of course anyone is entitled to do what they want, but in my opinion they are just in denial, and most of them know that deep down inside.

 

[tttony]

If you honestly felt like a victim, you'd be seeking help or a discussion, not throwing nonsense assumptions around as general rules for people who are largely happy and well-adjusted, content with their kinks. You don't get taken seriously telling strangers on the internet they were all clearly abused because they enjoy something you don't.

I am sorry, but I thought that what I said was pretty obvious, that tickling is a fetish that in most cases comes from the childhood. I dont think that's a nonsens assumptions, at least to who wants or can hear it.

 

[rhiannon]

Having a fetish, whichever it is, is not a healthy thing.

You could as well say "having sex is not a healthy thing". Would be the same. How does it matter what floats your boat unless it's something like cannibalism? (Which, by the way, exists. What do you think how that developed? Did people who are into it get eaten when they were children?)

Actually my intent is to help people affected by this fetish

Thank you very much. We don't want or need any help, we are perfectly happy with our fetish. At least I am!

 

[rhiannon]

I am sorry, but I thought that what I said was pretty obvious, that tickling is a fetish that in most cases comes from the childhood. I dont think that's a nonsens assumptions, at least to who wants or can hear it.

I suggest you find one of the million threads on here were people are asked where they think their fetish comes from and read the answers. I can assure you, not one of them was "I was abused". Or maybe you should just start a survey and see how many abuse victims you find here.

 

[tttony]

Everyone it being too hard on tttony. He says that tickling ruined his life, that people who have the fetish need therapy, and that he has been talking to people about the origins of their tickle fetish for 15 years.

If all of that is true, then obviously the therapy he has received has not helped, given that he still feels that his life is ruined. Also, it is consuming his life, if he has spent 15 years finding people who have the fetishand asking them about the origin of it. Having said that, I have doubts that he really has done that for 15 years and consistently gotten the answer he describes. People on this forum who have responded to the many threads on “how did your fetish start” have, in the majority, said that they think they were born with it They have no reason to lie in an anonymous forum like this. But I believe that tttony thinks that his fetish originated in this way, and he desperately wants to get away from it.

So, to tttony, I wish you good luck in dealing with your issues. The takeaway from the responses you have received are (a) don’t assume that everyone else spends as much time or mental energy on the fetish as you do, that their fetish originated in the same way, or that their situations are otherwise like yours, and (b) get a different therapist, if you have been getting therapy and still feel like your life is ruined. You can unruin it!

By the way, I’m afraid to ask you your views of homosexuality, so I won’t!

I never got therapy for it, because I know there is no therapy to get out of a fetish, whatever fetish it is. I am just trying to say that this is real, that people with such a fetish suffer from it and as I said I talked to many people who told me that in the past 15 years.

And by the way, I am a very open minded person and have absolutely nothing against homosexuality. I am not a bigot or anything like that. I am just a guy who happens to have a tickling fetish which originated by abuse received in my childhood.

 

[-Hari-]

Actually my intent is to help people affected by this fetish and maybe make them realize things they never thought about it. It's not my intention to offend anyone. A tickling fetish is, in my opinion, as addicting as drugs, and it damages your body (mind) just the same. Having a fetish, whichever it is, is not a healthy thing.

Like I said earlier this is what I think, of course anyone is entitled to do what they want, but in my opinion they are just in denial, and most of them know that deep down inside.

it might not be your intention but can you see how its possibly the result of the way you're presenting your point? you aren't offering help for people who have an issue, you're telling everyone they have a problem. you're saying that having a fetish is a problem full stop and that's just not the case. I dont have a problem and neither do many others my fetish has lead to extremely sensual and exciting relationships and experiences that I may not have had otherwise, its a positive thing that I embrace and its there because I think its hot, and always have.

sure some people have issues with it but I really would suggest that somehow getting rid of a fetish isn't the answer, as they will just become addicted to something else see? The way to help over obsessive people is to help them gain self control. Understand that before you try to help people or you will be fighting a loosing battle.

Just be careful how you present things and accept that not everyone is in the same boat, then you wont offend people and this wont end up being a flame war which gets locked and then you don't get to get your message across.

 

[ChicagoDavid]

Well, tttony, if you accept that there is no way to get out of the fetish, don’t you think you should work on finding a more positive way to view it and deal with the fact that it always will be a part of your life?

 

[Kittycupcake]

Well done for creating a very spirited debate (although in my opinion you could have done it a lot more sensitively).
Did it perhaps occur to you that you should be posting about this on a forum for other people who are trying to "get help" for their fetish, rather than one where people embrace it?

 

[tttony]

To Rhiannon:

Ok, I feel like talking to a wall, you dont want to hear what I am trying to say. So have a nice day, live in denial not wanting to understand what it means having fetishes, and enjoy yours.

 

[rhiannon]

never got therapy for it, because I know there is no therapy to get out of a fetish, whatever fetish it is. I am just trying to say that this is real, that people with such a fetish suffer from it and as I said I talked to many people who told me that in the past 15 years.

You are right, you cannot make a fetish go away - but you can learn to live with it so you don't suffer from it.

And there probably are people who suffer from their fetish, but let me assure you, it's not everybody who has the fetish.

 

[rhiannon]

Ok, I feel like talking to a wall, you dont want to hear what I am trying to say. So have a nice day, live in denial not wanting to understand what it means having fetishes, and enjoy yours.

Yeah...I can give that wall-feeling right back to you! 🙂

I understand, there are people who are suffering from their fetish. But you need to understand it's not eberybody. I don't live in denial. I mean - what does it mean having a fetish?

There are a million fetishes, and they for sure cannot all have developed due to abuse. Do you agree with me on that one?

 

[Kittycupcake]

To Rhiannon:

Ok, I feel like talking to a wall, you dont want to hear what I am trying to say. So have a nice day, live in denial not wanting to understand what it means having fetishes, and enjoy yours.

JUst because she doesn't happen to agree doesn't mean she's not listening.

 

[Wolf]

I used to live in New Orleans, and I think I may have this figured out. Maybe ttony is like the fire-and-brimstone preachers who used to hang around in front of the strip clubs on Bourbon Street; bravely wading neck-deep in the vile sludge of filth and perversion, solely for the purpose of educating others to the dangers of such vile filth and perversion.

He's like a saint, really.

 

[Kittycupcake]

I used to live in New Orleans, and I think I may have this figured out. Maybe ttony is like the fire-and-brimstone preachers who used to hang around in front of the strip clubs on Bourbon Street; bravely wading neck-deep in the vile sludge of filth and perversion, solely for the purpose of educating others to the dangers of such vile filth and perversion.

He's like a saint, really.

You're funny! Oh and weetabix is a gross kinda cereal thing, be glad you guys don't have it!

 

[tttony]

it might not be your intention but can you see how its possibly the result of the way you're presenting your point? you aren't offering help for people who have an issue, you're telling everyone they have a problem. you're saying that having a fetish is a problem full stop and that's just not the case. I dont have a problem and neither do many others my fetish has lead to extremely sensual and exciting relationships and experiences that I may not have had otherwise, its a positive thing that I embrace and its there because I think its hot, and always have.



sure some people have issues with it but I really would suggest that somehow getting rid of a fetish isn't the answer, as they will just become addicted to something else see? The way to help over obsessive people is to help them gain self control. Understand that before you try to help people or you will be fighting a loosing battle.

Just be careful how you present things and accept that not everyone is in the same boat, then you wont offend people and this wont end up being a flame war which gets locked and then you don't get to get your message across.

I appreciate your words, and it's good to confront ideas.

My general assumption is that tickling is a fetish (often coming from abuse in the childhood) which can disturb the life of people affected by it. I actually talked to psychiatrists and psychologists about it and found out there in no way of getting rid of such a fetish. What one can do is try to limit and control it, which I have been trying to do.

So from a medical point of view it is a problem. What makes me feel bad is then to see people making money on people who are affected by it, I am thinking of the 18 years old boy who has a tickling fetish (maybe because he was tickled extensively as a child) who gets online and sees one thousands tickling clips, often in the nude. It blows his mind, and his fetish gets amplified one thousand times and start thinking about it one thousand times more.

I am just trying to make people aware of this aspect of the fetish. And how people can get entangled in it making it a lot worse and harder to control it.

 

[rhiannon]

So from a medical point of view it is a problem.

It can sure be, if you are suffering from it. Every psychological state is only a problem if it causes psychological strain.

I don't know what kind of strain yours is, but I sure talked to people who suffer from their fetish because they can only get pleasure by it and not have regular sex, therefore have hardly a chance to find a partner. That is indeed a problem and should be treated by a psychologist so they can lead a normal, happy life.

But not all people feel that way. Most people I know who are into tickling lead a perfectly happy life with it. Therefore they do not need any medical treatment and therefore it is not a medical problem.

I am just trying to make people aware of this aspect of the fetish. And how people can get entangled in it making it a lot worse and harder to control it.

It is the same thing with porn or any other aspect of sex. What do you feel should be done about it? Ban all kinds of sexual material?

 

[tttony]

I used to live in New Orleans, and I think I may have this figured out. Maybe ttony is like the fire-and-brimstone preachers who used to hang around in front of the strip clubs on Bourbon Street; bravely wading neck-deep in the vile sludge of filth and perversion, solely for the purpose of educating others to the dangers of such vile filth and perversion.

He's like a saint, really.

No, I am not a saint, I simply have a tickling fetish which comes from abuse in my childhood that in my opinion has ruined my life. And I feel sorry for other people who might have experienced the same.

 

[rhiannon]

No, I am not a saint, I simply have a tickling fetish which comes from abuse in my childhood that in my opinion has ruined my life. And I feel sorry for other people who might have experienced the same.

It is bad if something like that happens, but please do not assume it happened to all of us.

 

[Wolf]

What one can do is try to limit and control it, which I have been trying to do.

So, you're gonna keep coming here until you can control it? Weird. My computer has an ON/OFF button, and, aside from the occasional pop-up (I swear, I don't know how some of those sites showed up on my history...) , I can pick and choose what sites I visit.

So from a medical point of view it is a problem. What makes me feel bed is rthen to see people making money on people who are affected by it, I am thinking of the 18 years old boy who has a tickling fetish (maybe because he was tickled extensively as a child) who gets online and sees one thousands tickling clips, often in the nude. It blows his mind, and his fetish gets amplified one thousand times and start thinking about it one thousand times more.
I am just trying to make people aware of this aspect of the fetish. And how people can get entangled in it making it a lot worse and harder to control it.

Gotcha. Like when I sent off for those brochures on Enzyte and Rogaine....for a friend.

 

[Wolf]

ttony -

All kidding aside, if you want to control your fetish, and you've been seeking or going to therapy, how does being here help?

 

[tttony]

It can sure be, if you are suffering from it. Every psychological state is only a problem if it causes psychological strain.

I don't know what kind of strain yours is, but I sure talked to people who suffer from their fetish because they can only get pleasure by it and not have regular sex, therefore have hardly a chance to find a partner. That is indeed a problem and should be treated by a psychologist so they can lead a normal, happy life.

But not all people feel that way. Most people I know who are into tickling lead a perfectly happy life with it. Therefore they do not need any medical treatment and therefore it is not a medical problem.



It is the same thing with porn or any other aspect of sex. What do you feel should be done about it? Ban all kinds of sexual material?

You got the point finally, people with a tickling fetish can only have sexual pleasure if tickling is involved. That's the clear sign of having a fetish, which makes it very difficult for them finding a partner and limit their lives.

I dont know what should be done, but I know for sure that being flooded with tickling clips or tickling material in general definitely doesnt help someone who is trying to control such a fetish.

It's like a alcoholic trying to quit who in the next room has a thousand bottles of alcohol.