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I was just diagnoised as having asperger's disorder

T

tickleteasing

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Something happened to me a few days ago that I want to tell you all about. See right now I am going through a vocational rehab and in order to do that I had to have a psychological evaluation done. I just got the results back a week or so ago and they said what I had was Aspergers disorder. So many people have thought that I was on the autistic spectrum over the years. On the sexuality mailing list I belong to, to people who have met me in college. I guess after having the diagnosis I feel very angry about it, I am angry because I do not agree with it.
 
As we discussed online before, did you go to your psychiatrist for a second opinion? Just curious. I feel bad that your angry about but for me I just knew that once I learned more about it, it sounded just like me. Just hang in there and try not to worry about it.


:bouncybou
 
ticklejen said:
As we discussed online before, did you go to your psychiatrist for a second opinion? Just curious. I feel bad that your angry about but for me I just knew that once I learned more about it, it sounded just like me. Just hang in there and try not to worry about it.


:bouncybou
Click to expand...



Not yet but I will
 
An article on Autism that I read

I received an article from my GRASP meeting earlier this month and I'd like to quote some of the article on here so that people understand autism better and other things. The article is called Embracing the Face of Autism: Are we Ready? by Yvone Fast who's a high functioning autistic lady.

"The adult autistic population is about to explode. Each year, about 25,000 children are diagnosed with various ASDs (autism spectrum disorders). The number of diagnosed cases has risen exponentially, from 1 in 10,000 in 1993, to just 1 in 150 in 2007. Children with autism grow up and become adults with autism. Are we as a society ready to embrace them?

Most people in America still don't understand autism. Many think of the movie Rain Man or of autistic savants. And our IQs can range from genius through average to impaired.

We try to conform to the mold. In spite of great effort to change, we remain our own unique, eccentric selves. So we travel life's road pretending to be normal, trying to fit into a world that refuses to accept us. Yet all of our effort and persistence is not good enough for the neurotypical (people who aren't autistic at all) world that we live in."

So even though that's the gist of the article I still don't go around feeling sorry for myself but I just wanted people on here to know what Autistic and Asperger Syndome people are up against when dealing with most of the world that isn't Autistic at all. I have also read a lot on Asperger Syndrome and Autism to know that those two disabilities are the most misunderstood of all the other disabilities out there.

Thank you for anyone or if anyone reads this information. Have a good day.
 
That's crap, Jen!

Now are a few idiots in this world that don't welcome people who are different and misunderstood, Hell Yes! But are there also people like me who are compasionate to anybody no matter what race or disabilties they may have, MOST DEFINETLY!

People with AS (and I'm not picking on you) need to stop feeling sorry for themselves and realize that all people have problems and not just them. Try people who have Down Syndrome and have the mentallity of an eight year old, and most likely will have to spend most of their short term lives in a special home where they're taken care of. I say short lives because they normally don't make it to forty, but some do.

We all have problems, and with equal rights come equal responsibilty. I honestly don't see anything remotely wrong with you. Just don't expect too much from yourself, it's not healthy dudette.
 
jersey_tickler said:
That's crap, Jen!

Now are a few idiots in this world that don't welcome people who are different and misunderstood, Hell Yes! But are there also people like me who are compasionate to anybody no matter what race or disabilties they may have, MOST DEFINETLY!

People with AS (and I'm not picking on you) need to stop feeling sorry for themselves and realize that all people have problems and not just them. Try people who have Down Syndrome and have the mentallity of an eight year old, and most likely will have to spend most of their short term lives in a special home where they're taken care of. I say short lives because they normally don't make it to forty, but some do.

We all have problems, and with equal rights come equal responsibilty. I honestly don't see anything remotely wrong with you. Just don't expect too much from yourself, it's not healthy dudette.
Click to expand...

I agree with Jersey. In my opinion there is a SMALL percentage of people that are really intolerant of others, and unfortunately that percentage may make up a LARGE percentage of that one person's world, BUT (and this is a rather large but) venture outside of that, and I'm sure there are BUNCHES and BUNCHES of people who will love you for who you are, no matter what you have. I personally have met people with all kinds of conditions from sexual diseases to physical conditions to psychological disorders to certain others diseases like lupis, or cancer, and even when I was younger I knew some kids that were autistic. Though I didn't hardly understand the situation (my mom tried to explain it to me) they were still friends in my eyes. And on top of that, like jersey said, EVERYONE has problems. Who are they to judge really? There's only one judge in my eyes, and that one does not live on earth. So don't worry about it. Those that refuse the education and to be tolerant of others obviously don't belong in your life anyway.
 
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If I want to know how tolerant society is, my method of finding out will be to consult the people who actually belong to affinity groups that have to struggle for respect and acceptance. They're the ones who can explain to me what they have to deal with. I'm not the one whom they need to explain to them how they should be perceiving the world they live in. Lord knows we've heard plenty of whites try to explain to blacks that the racism they're experiencing is all in their imaginations.
 
Now that I got my ideological rant out of the way, let me address Tickle Teasing personally.

I went through a period of thinking I might have Asperger's. After someone I knew suggested the possibility, I was posting on an Asperger's message board for a while (it was so long ago that I have no record of the link) and contemplating getting tested. I ultimately concluded that I didn't have it, at least not in any highly intense form. I am familiar with it, though, and can think of at least two friends of mine who I'm sure do have it whether they've had any diagnosis or not. That said, my suggestion to you would be to think a bit beyond the question of whether the label exactly fits or not, and deal with another question: Does learning about it and getting treatment for it help you understand yourself better, and bring you closer to any goals you have? Ultimately you have to decide that, and in the meantime, an Asperger's message board might give you some further insights. I felt very much at home there myself, whether I actually had the full syndrome or not. Whatever you do, respect yourself and don't let any label serve to disable.
 
jersey_tickler said:
That's crap, Jen!

Now are a few idiots in this world that don't welcome people who are different and misunderstood, Hell Yes! But are there also people like me who are compasionate to anybody no matter what race or disabilties they may have, MOST DEFINETLY!

People with AS (and I'm not picking on you) need to stop feeling sorry for themselves and realize that all people have problems and not just them. Try people who have Down Syndrome and have the mentallity of an eight year old, and most likely will have to spend most of their short term lives in a special home where they're taken care of. I say short lives because they normally don't make it to forty, but some do.

We all have problems, and with equal rights come equal responsibilty. I honestly don't see anything remotely wrong with you. Just don't expect too much from yourself, it's not healthy dudette.
Click to expand...

Jersey I am NOT FEELING SORRY FOR MYSELF! It's just that I am tired of guys not "getting" me or have a problem with me in some other way. I just quoted from an article that is pretty much true! That being said, it doesn't mean that Asperger people should give up on living life to the fullest. We need to cope as best we can and I am doing that also. I mean the truth is, that everyone judges everyone in this world whether we like it or not. As for Down Syndrome people, people in this country anyway known about that condition for MUCH LONGER than they've known in this country anyway, than they've known about Asperger Syndrome. I mean I quoted from an article that is realistic so you should just respect it.

I know that everyone has problems okay but Asperger Syndrome people have it PARTICULARLY challenging and that's how I look at life, as challenge. I am not trivializing other people's challenges but we have more challenges than most people. So just calm down jersey, I am okay :cool2:.
 
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Jen, my cousin has Aspergers (I suspect, he's not been diagnosed to my knowledge), and he isn't the one who suffers, it's the people who are stuck in a conversation with him.

I swear to God, you talk to the guy more than 30 seconds, you're looking for a way out. Actually, you aren't talking, you're listening.

My question - as an AS sufferer, are you aware of yourself in a social climate and do you have to take a second to carefully craft a conversation so that people will want to converse with you?

If so, that sucks, and I feel sorry for you, but I commend you (and others in general) for doing it. That has to be tedious.
 
Actually, Horatio, I think you have a valid point up to a point, but you word it a little too singularly and stridently. Yes, having Asperger's Syndrome does pose some extra difficulties with social skills, but the person afflicted with it frequently has no way of knowing what's wrong or what to do about it. Of course, persons dealing with the manifestations have no way of knowing where it's all coming from either, so there's lots of room for mutual misunderstanding between the person with Asperger's Syndrome and other persons. Believe me, I've seen it happen, and in years past I have had it happen to me. (I have had Asperger-like tendencies that I've had to work on, in conjunction with some other areas of personal growth and social adaptation.)

But in this instance, I definitely think TickleJen is someone who can explain a lot to the rest of us, rather than someone who needs everybody else to explain things to her. Does that mean that I think there's anybody here on this board who has the whole definitive truth? Of course not. And as for your cousin, I know from experience that there are ways of helping him, and the extent of the help can be commensurate with how much he's willing to discuss and hear about.

Edited to add: Reading Horatio's post more closely, I retract (at least somewhat) the opening portion of my post that sounds like a criticism of his. Note also that I'm not including Horatio among those who are trying to explain the ways of the world to TickleJen; that portion was more of a follow-up to my earlier response to our Jersey friend.
 
Horatio said:
Jen, my cousin has Aspergers (I suspect, he's not been diagnosed to my knowledge), and he isn't the one who suffers, it's the people who are stuck in a conversation with him.

I swear to God, you talk to the guy more than 30 seconds, you're looking for a way out. Actually, you aren't talking, you're listening.

My question - as an AS sufferer, are you aware of yourself in a social climate and do you have to take a second to carefully craft a conversation so that people will want to converse with you?

If so, that sucks, and I feel sorry for you, but I commend you (and others in general) for doing it. That has to be tedious.
Click to expand...

That's a good question Horatio and I will do my best to answer it. I do feel bad for your cousin and that's just another example of what some of us Asperger people go through. It sounds to me that your cousin has a problem with people listening to him because he probably talks about a subject and goes on and on and on about it for a long time driving the listener crazy. I know I don't know him but that's what I am guessing he does. If I am wrong, then I apologize but that's what I think.

I think what you're asking is do I have to actually think about how I will conduct a conversation in a friendly way and the answer is most of the time is no. I try to be a friendly, good listener, and caring person and those are just some of my good character traits. I used to have problems reading body language but since I've been taking my social skills class for over a year, I have been getting better at reading people.

:bouncybou
 
Jen, I know you're not feeling sorry for yourself, because I stated that in my post. But for some reason you don't read what is in ().

I said, and I quote "People with AS (and I'm not picking on you) need to stop feeling sorry for themselves and realize that all people have problems and not just them."

I simply stated that people with AS (besides you) need to stop feeling sorry for themselves and accept the fact that life dealt them a bad hand. I had to struggle with dyslexia as a kid and I've been fighting that battle almost my entire life. I also just found out that my friend's brother has AS and he is an excellent welder among very fine artist.

I apologize for not calling you back, but my minutes have been few as of late. We will talk in time, when I'm not taking care of my pregnant girlfriend.
 
Ok

jersey_tickler said:
Jen, I know you're not feeling sorry for yourself, because I stated that in my post. But for some reason you don't read what is in ().

I said, and I quote "People with AS (and I'm not picking on you) need to stop feeling sorry for themselves and realize that all people have problems and not just them."

I simply stated that people with AS (besides you) need to stop feeling sorry for themselves and accept the fact that life dealt them a bad hand. I had to struggle with dyslexia as a kid and I've been fighting that battle almost my entire life. I also just found out that my friend's brother has AS and he is an excellent welder among very fine artist.

I apologize for not calling you back, but my minutes have been few as of late. We will talk in time, when I'm not taking care of my pregnant girlfriend.
Click to expand...


Note how he turned this post into something about HIM? Honestly do you think she cares if you call her? I find it hilarious that you apologize to her and say you are going to call in the same sentence you discuss your pregnant girlfriend. What happened to morality and ethics and does your GF know about Jen and you apologizing to her because you have to take care of your GF?
 
Now My Question

I didn't want to put this in the same post as anything by that tool Jersey Tickler.

What exactly is Aspergers and how does it affect someone socially? Jen seems very intelligent and self aware and appears to communicate very well.
 
His girlfriend, is right here, thank you very much, and can speak for herself.

How dare you insult my boyfriend, when all he was trying to do is simply clear the air with Jen (whom he met in person and became friends with). He didn't make it about him, he was just trying to use his dyslexia as an example. JT only mentioned me because I've been going through a rough time and he's helping me. I know he's talked to Jen on the phone and I have no problem whatsoever. And if you know nothing about AS, than you have no right putting down my man who knows the basic symptoms of AS being that he's met people who've had it and looked it up. I just wish people like you would quit causing drama on this forum. Does Tom Cruise have to pay you a visit and tell you that you're glib too!

Oh, and Jersey may be a jackhammer in bed, but that doesn't make him a tool!:jester:
 
jersey_tickler said:
Jen, I know you're not feeling sorry for yourself, because I stated that in my post. But for some reason you don't read what is in ().

I said, and I quote "People with AS (and I'm not picking on you) need to stop feeling sorry for themselves and realize that all people have problems and not just them."

I simply stated that people with AS (besides you) need to stop feeling sorry for themselves and accept the fact that life dealt them a bad hand. I had to struggle with dyslexia as a kid and I've been fighting that battle almost my entire life. I also just found out that my friend's brother has AS and he is an excellent welder among very fine artist.

I apologize for not calling you back, but my minutes have been few as of late. We will talk in time, when I'm not taking care of my pregnant girlfriend.
Click to expand...

Jersey, when you say that people with A.S need to stop feeling sorry for themselves I tend to take that personally because I have A.S. It seems you are presuming that ALL people with A.S feel sorry for themselves but I know PLENTY of people with A.S who DON'T let A.S define them as a person and know that it's just a part of who we are. I really don't know how much you know about A.S and I know that you have looked it up and know people who have this specific disability but you don't HAVE IT YOURSELF.

Look I certainly know that everyone has problems okay but it's just happens to be true that Asperger Syndrome is probably the most MISUNDERSTOOD disability out there so far. I will say that people with A.S certainly do know that we life has dealt us a bad hand, as you say, (if you ask me that's a negative way to put it) it certainly doesn't mean as it seems you are saying that we or I never have a right to complain about our or my struggles throughout our lives or my life.

I mean for example, if you knew someone who was permanently in a wheelchair and basically had a a good attitude, does that not mean they are never allowed to complain about being in a wheelchair and cannot walk? I mean they shouldn't focus on it their handicap all the time but they should be allowed to complain about it every once and a while. I mean we're all human, it's human nature to do that especially if someone has a disability.
 
Banshee said:
I didn't want to put this in the same post as anything by that tool Jersey Tickler.

What exactly is Aspergers and how does it affect someone socially? Jen seems very intelligent and self aware and appears to communicate very well.
Click to expand...

Thank you Banshee. I really appreciate the compliment. I think you should read the link that bugman gave and learn more about it if you want to, it's up to you. Also, I don't think it was necessary to bring up Jersey's girlfriend on this thread. I have chatted with her online and she seems very nice to me.
 
ticklejen said:
That's a good question Horatio and I will do my best to answer it. I do feel bad for your cousin and that's just another example of what some of us Asperger people go through. It sounds to me that your cousin has a problem with people listening to him because he probably talks about a subject and goes on and on and on about it for a long time driving the listener crazy. I know I don't know him but that's what I am guessing he does. If I am wrong, then I apologize but that's what I think.

I think what you're asking is do I have to actually think about how I will conduct a conversation in a friendly way and the answer is most of the time is no. I try to be a friendly, good listener, and caring person and those are just some of my good character traits. I used to have problems reading body language but since I've been taking my social skills class for over a year, I have been getting better at reading people.

:bouncybou
Click to expand...

Well done - and it sounds like you know my cousin 😉

I see your social skills class is helping you. That would do wonders for him.
 
Before I say anything else, I just want to state for the record of how I feel about ticklejen.

I think she's a wonderful woman, and she's fun to be around. If I sound negative, please understand it's not my intention. I do care about ticklejen, and I'm just trying to help her.

Jen, you can't assume what I'm getting at, without asking a said question. I do not think that all people with Aspbergers Syndrome feel sorry for themselves. I also think that everyone is allowed to complain because we all have that right. I just think that you shouldn't take everything that I say personally, because I'm not trying to put anyone down here. I love people, I will welcome anyone in this world with open arms. But that's not the point, I'm getting at here. My point is that we SHOULDN'T complain about our problems, because it doesn't do any good. I know from experience, because I used to get angry all the time because of my disabilty. But that ship sailed away, and I came to the belief that everyday is a blessing.

And before the Banshee starts wailing again, I'm not making this about me like my girl stated. I'm just trying to show Jen that I know what it's like to be different, and to fight a disabilty.

Jen, if you think my comment about being dealt a bad hand was negative, well so was the article you posted. I'm not being mean, it's a fact, and other people have agreed with me in this thread. I'm not calling you negative, but the person who wrote the article was.

So can we put this behind us, and go back to all the fun stuff we used to talk about. I miss our conversations Jen, and my girlfriend loved chatting with you being that you're about the same age and all.
 
jersey_tickler said:
Before I say anything else, I just want to state for the record of how I feel about ticklejen.

I think she's a wonderful woman, and she's fun to be around. If I sound negative, please understand it's not my intention. I do care about ticklejen, and I'm just trying to help her.

Jen, you can't assume what I'm getting at, without asking a said question. I do not think that all people with Aspbergers Syndrome feel sorry for themselves. I also think that everyone is allowed to complain because we all have that right. I just think that you shouldn't take everything that I say personally, because I'm not trying to put anyone down here. I love people, I will welcome anyone in this world with open arms. But that's not the point, I'm getting at here. My point is that we SHOULDN'T complain about our problems, because it doesn't do any good. I know from experience, because I used to get angry all the time because of my disabilty. But that ship sailed away, and I came to the belief that everyday is a blessing.

And before the Banshee starts wailing again, I'm not making this about me like my girl stated. I'm just trying to show Jen that I know what it's like to be different, and to fight a disabilty.

Jen, if you think my comment about being dealt a bad hand was negative, well so was the article you posted. I'm not being mean, it's a fact, and other people have agreed with me in this thread. I'm not calling you negative, but the person who wrote the article was.

So can we put this behind us, and go back to all the fun stuff we used to talk about. I miss our conversations Jen, and my girlfriend loved chatting with you being that you're about the same age and all.
Click to expand...

Jersey, I just want you to know that I still like you and all but no offense, you are still very young and need to learn more about life. I am responding to as best what I am reading that I think you are saying. I don't think that people should go around complaining all the time but I do think that people certainly have the God given right to compain and or vent about their problems sometimes because it would make us feel better about it and people need to vent like they do on here occasionally. I mean even if it doesn't solve the problem they should be allowed to complain anyway, they just shouldn't make a habit of it that's all. If people didn't complain about their problems sometimes, then all the negative feelings would be bottled up and eventually that person would explode in anger at some point.

Also, that article I quoted from I wouldn't call necessarily negative but it's realistic. It's a shame that you can even appreciate what that article said because even though YOU ARE ACCEPTING OF PEOPLE IT DOESN'T MEAN THAT EVERYONE IN THIS WORLD IS, I mean you are a very nice guy and there should more people in this world like you Jersey. However, most people ARE NOT like you Jersey and it's THOSE people that we have to deal with most of the time. The article merely points out the primary challenges that people on the Autism Spectrum face most of the time in their lives, that's all.

I don't think that your girlfriend should've been brought up on this thread. I think I am repeating myself but that's how I feel. I do miss our chats online and we will begin to do that soon Jersey.
 
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