Moments Of Death

[Neutron]

I have a question. Assume you have a close friend or relative. I guess for this sake we'll have to say they're ill and the illness will culminate in their death.
You've been granted the power to know the exact moment of their death. I don't mean euthanasia, I simply mean for some reason you know the exact moment they'll die. You can't tell them you know.

Would you choose to be with them at that moment?

Tron

 

[venray]

If they were going to go quietly, I would want to be there. I would like the opportunity to say my goodbyes so to speak.

Ray

 

[Admiral Trouser]

Qiuetly or not, I'd be there with them. In fact, if there death *was* gruesome, for want of a better term, then I'd wish to be there to comfort them even more...to say that such an event would be the most traumatic and frightening of that person's life is massive understatement...I'd like to be there to take help them through it.

But what a terrible thing to know about, anyway. Good question, though.

AT 🙂

 

[Flatfoot]

Yeah, I'd definitely choose to be with them at that time.

 

[Neutron]

I Agree..

It's an extremely terrible thing to know about.
And yes I meant quietly, in a controlled environment. I didn't mention painlessly because I feel that's somewhat unrealistic. (Yes I know this thread isn't realistic either)

A followup question: If you stayed would it be because you want to say goodbye? Or would it be to give some bit of comfort at the moment of death? What if they were unconscious?.

For the recod, yes I would be there, hopefully holding their hand. I'm not sure whether it's to say goodbye, or to honor the end of a relationship that brought a lot of satisfaction to both sides.

Tron

 

[His Divine Shadow]

Unconcious or not, quiet or not, I'd be there. Even if you couldn't say goodbye, simply being with them seems like something that, to me, I should do.

 

[JoBelle]

I've just lived through this situation.

My Aunt, who raised me, passed away on Monday morning. We knew by the way her body was shutting down organ by organ, almost exactly how much time she had left.

She had been ill with cancer for a almost two years. She took her treatments like a trooper, never complaining, and just trying to be with her loved ones as much as possible. In the end, we surrounded here. Held her hand. And in the last moments we told her goodbye and let her know that our faith would have us follow to her one day.

The funeral service was last night. Over four hundred people were there.

I bet almost everyone of them would have chosen to be with her at the moment when she was slipping from her sick and mangled body to someone else. Where ever else! Anywhere else. Sometimes, as much grief as there is involved....it's good to be there to see them escape the situation.

So, yep. Been there. It was the best choice I could have made.

Joby

 

[Marauder]

I's ask them if they wanted me around. Death is a pretty private business, I think. I wouldn't want anyone around when I croak, it's too damn depressing. I'd expect them to give me a gun when death is inevitable so I could kick it on my own terms and die with a baseball sized hole in my head, my brains decoratively splattered across a running television with home shopping network on and an extended middle finger raised heavenwards. I'd offer my friends the same alternative or do whatever they would like to make the end something to remember. Dynamite comes to mind.

 

[JoBelle]

🙄

Yeah, ok.

 

[steph]

Absolutely.

I have a question. Assume you have a close friend or relative. I guess for this sake we'll have to say they're ill and the illness will culminate in their death.
You've been granted the power to know the exact moment of their death. I don't mean euthanasia, I simply mean for some reason you know the exact moment they'll die. You can't tell them you know.

Would you choose to be with them at that moment?

Tron

 

[Neutron]

steph Why?

And Jobelle thank you very much.

Tron

 

[f/f]

Id be with them, if they wanted me to or not. People with a little time before death need somebody with them.

 

[steph]

Re: steph Why?

Hey Mr.~

Beginning with Danny, the beloved high school sweetheart I lost at 19 to a mountain climbing accident, I have lost an additional 9 friends, ALL to unforeseen circumstances (car accidents, pneumonia, heart attack at the age of 30...)

As selfish and appalling as I know it sounds (especially for someone as generally even-tempered such as myself) I have had the shameful experience to have on occasion been seen screaming at tombstones.

To have been robbed of the chance to say goodbye and tell them how very much they meant is an experience I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy...

And Jobelle thank you very much.

Tron

 

[tommytikl]

To have been robbed of the chance to say goodbye and tell them how very much they meant is an experience I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy...

I soo agree with this!!!
My grandmother went on a vacation to Ireland to visit the farm she grew up on(still owned by her family) and died in the room she was bon in!!!!
I never "really" got to say goodbye because she was in exceptional health at 89 with "just" arthritis and died of a heart attack, the doctors think because of a blockage due to the flight over.
I do wish I could have said goodbye...her death took a while to get over!!!🙁
However, I always think of her and my heart brightens because of the mark she left on my heart, not the last moment. 🙂

 

[steph]

Ya Tommy, that totally sucks. I was recently asked to do the eulogy for a dear friend. I really didn't have the words to go thru with it but it meant a lot to the family and I didn't have the heart to turn them down. I found a beautiful quote. I didn't write it and said as much but I sure would love to know who the author is...A lot of people came to me afterwards and thanked me, becuase it really spoke to them:

"A wise man once said, if there is any dignity in dying, it lies in having left the world a better place, simply because you lived in it..."

From there I went on to list the many ways this person had touched my life, which was very easy to do...

XOXO

 

[tommytikl]

Nicely done Steph

 

[steph]

Thank you darling, it's one of those things that I hate that experience has made me good at I guess.

I'm sorry to hear about your beloved Gram...

XOXO

 

[TicklishSinner]

I would want to be there regaurdless of how they went if I could be holding their hand the whole time that would be a good thing and try to comfort them..I chose to speak at my best friends funeral who was killed in a car accident and I was in the car as well, it was the hardest thing for me to do, but it meant alot to her family and I know it meant alot to her

 

[kis123]

First of all, Jobelle I send you condolences for your loss. Now to answer the question posted on this thread:

Absolutely, positively, undeniably would I like to be there!

My mom died almost nine years ago in a nursing home. The day before she died, my kids begged to go see her. The home had early hours and by the time we would've gotten there, it would've been closed. I told them I would pick them up from camp early and take them the next day. My mom died at 1am the next morning, found by her nurse. She died alone and it gets to me to this very day. I wanted to be the last person who looked into her eyes and told her goodbye. I should've listened to my children. None of us got to say goodbye.🙁

My stepdad called us on a Sunday night and had unusually long conversations with me and the kids. He normally calls to check in, but this time it was over an hour before he hung up. I told him I'd bring the kids over the weekend like I normally do. He was found dead by his brother that following Tuesday. He actually died of heart failure that Monday afternoon. Once again, no one got to say goodbye. My son was devastated and it took six months for him to recover from the loss.

If I ever knew in advance that someone else I loved was going to die, I'd stop time to be with them!

 

[crydun]

Thanks Neutron for this great thread.

yes, I would want to be with them, no matter the situation. My father is slowly dying of dementia and everyday, when I look at him, there's a little more missing of the man I once knew. I think back to all the years I took him for granted when I was younger and wish I could turn back the pages of time. Death can come like a theif in the night and rob you. You have to be prepared.

On that note, I wrote the following:

Daddy

Once in a while I catch a glimpse
Of the Daddy I once knew
His smile nice and wide
His eyes so bright and blue.

But then the smile fades
As smiles often do
His memory’s not as sharp now
His eyes are not as blue.

What’s happened to my Daddy?
Who once could build a house
From the floors up to the roof top
He could even charm a mouse.

Daddy, you are old now
Your hair is turning gray
What path will you follow
When your sorrows you will lay.

When your life is o’er
Your sorrows are laid down
I’ll remember the good times
And feel blessed you were around.







Sweet Release

You were locked in a prison from which you couldn’t escape
A life that was not your own
The Lord came and whispered, “The chains have broke free
It is time for you to come home.”

Peace fills the room as I write this for you
For I know that it won’t be long
Then the chains will break free
And you will escape
From this lonely prison you own.

Like an eagle you will soar
Above the clouds and sky
While you are flying, remember me
Come down and whisper good-bye.

Written by Crystal
June 14, 2000


God Bless You!!!