Oh xion - we meet again
😛
Yeah, but in saying that...why am I going to show a girl respect when she's flaunting about in a skirt longer than my belt? Is it sad that the guy isn't showing the girl the respect she 'deserves', or is it sad that the girl isn't showing herself the respect she 'deserves'?
I have to respectfully disagree that just because a person puts up their contact information, that it's equivalent to showing a little too much booty at a bar. I have my myspace, AIM, and Yahoo IM contact info on my profile for whoever wants to make use of them. It's not because I'm trying to grab extra attention or flash anything around, and it's certainly not because I'm disrespecting myself. I do it because I sincerely LOVE meeting new people, and I'm way too shy to PM people for the first time on my own. Having my contact information there is my way of trying to be inviting to make new friends. I understand that not all of the people who utilize that information are going to be people I jive with, and that's okay. I'm willing to weed out the people who rub me the wrong way if it means somewhere down the line I'll meet a good friend or two.
Same deal here...just not on such an exposed level...post the photos and the personal info, even the myspace account...it may look to other people like you're putting yourself out there (even though that may not be your intention), and before you know it...you don't have creeps...you have guys and girls wanting to satisfy their needs, wanting to meet other people, and wanting to explore their fetish without having to pass in the 'General Discussion' sub-forum first.
I don't think anyone is complaining about folks wanting to meet new people and/or explore their fetish. We all
do have at least one thing in common here, and that is our love of tickling in some way, shape or form. I think what people take issue with is either folks repeatedly/obsessively PMing or IMing after it's been made clear that it's unwelcome, or people starting off conversations with "Are your feet your most ticklish spot?" You would never approach someone like that in real life. Even at a gathering or munch where you know everyone is into tickling, you would
never approach somebody like that. It's just a plain lack of manners. I don't like feeling like I'm taking a survey when I first meet someone. "Most ticklish spot?" "Longest you've been tickled?" "Lee or ler?" "Size of feet?" "Size of breasts?" Come on, it's all a little ridiculous.
It's quite frustrating seeing such a regular like Annie complain about people pming her "creepy" shit. Well, that's what happens when you become a main contributor on a forum that is fundamentally about the tickling fetish. What were you expecting? A Shakespeare sonnet? A piece of writing about how your beautiful your hair shines under this virtual internet sun?
I think that Annie made it quite clear that she made a mistake by posting her personal info on the site. She said flat out...
I'm not saying that it's the "victim's" fault, though it shouldn't be surprising when one is so open with personal info.
having some common sense when using the internet (let alone ADULT websites) will keep a lot of the harassment from happening.
This says to me that she's aware that her actions contributed to the bad experience she had, and she learned not to do it again, and she's sharing that experience with the rest of us just to say, "heads up."
Please, cut your hair and quit bitchin' you friggn' emos.
I understand you're point, but I think this wasn't a particularly effective way of putting it. You're just gonna stir people up talking like that.
There's a block button for a reason, and give the people you believe here to be "creeps" the benefit of the doubt, yeh?
I can't speak for everyone, because I don't know how everyone handles these PM's, IM's or whatever. Personally, I do try to give people the benefit of the doubt (depending on the kind of day I'm having...I'll be the 1st to admit that if you catch me in a mood, I'll just block you without saying two words). I just recently got an IM from a seemingly nice guy who asked obsessively about my feet. I was annoyed, but told the guy straight out, look, you seem really nice, but I have to tell you that this is getting annoying. I don't want to feel like I'm being surveyed. Approach me like you would out in the real world. He did for about 5 minutes, and it was fun, but then he fell right back into it. I'm not going to waste anymore time on somebody who just doesn't get it. I gave him a chance, explained my issues, he didn't change his behavior. That tells me he's not THAT interested in getting to know me.
just because they may not want to get to know you on too much of a personal level, does not at at all warrant labels like 'creeps'.
I don't think everyone who doesn't want to get know people on a personal level are creeps. I've said it a thousand times and I'll say it a thousand more: there are people who enjoy that kind of interaction. They like the "i'm scribbling my fingers across your soles" "oh hehehe that tickles! I'm scrunching my toes!" and there's nothing wrong with that. More power to them when they find eachother and can have some fun. The people who I consider creepers are the people who IM me asking about where Euphoricy and Crystal and Tortuga are ticklish. The people who, when I say, "no thanks I'm not in the mood to talk about tickling," continue to IM me demanding to know why I stopped talking to them, why I blocked them, what's my fuckin problme? Why am I such a bitch? Those people are creeps - and I'll stand by calling them creeps.
Fuck, we're meant to be a fucking community. How do you think it looks to non-regulars seeing the most regular people on this forum referring to other people as 'creeps'? That's gonna go down well...
Like I said before, some of them are creeps, and they'll be creeps until they change their behavior and the ways they choose to interact with people. The guy I mentioned specifically - not a creep. Nice guy - just doesn't seem to get the kind of chat I'm into, so I choose not to really talk to him. Everybody has something different they want to get out of this community. For some people it's the porn, for some the stories, clips, art, discussion completely unrelated to tickling, tips and tricks on bondage or foot care, cyber-tickling, utilizing the chatroom...and for some...like me...the goal is to make friends on a level that will go past the internet. My goal isn't any better or worse, or more important or less important than anybody else's. But if I meet somebody whose goal or whose actions don't jive with my goal or my actions, I'm likely going to choose not to get to know that person on more than a casual level, because what they want and what I want are very different. Why waste either of our time?? He could be out finding a girl who loves to cyber -- I could be out meeting somebody who'll turn into my best friend in the entire world. Why waste time on eacother if we're not what eachother is looking for?
'
Oh my god, you're so hot, can I tickle you?" Well, shit...take it as a compliment, and don't read into it too deeply...
Sure, it's a compliment. Very flattering. But when you say "no thanks" and they get all pissy like you owe it to them - that's when it goes past just taking a compliment, and becomes annoying and potentially creepy.
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If you really want to get anywhere with a woman eloquence and manners are the only way to get there
I couldn't have said it better.