Some people can't answer a simple @#$%ing question

[Illtcklu]

I'm in the chatroom tonight and I ask someone if her soles are ticklish. All she keeps saying is "I'm not into feet". I didn't ASK what she's into, I don't CARE what she's into. Was just asking for my own fantasy purposes. I know there's nothing that says she HAS to answer. It just irritates me when women answer this way for no apparent reason: "I'm not into feet" and I ask women at random on AOL all the time and sometimes I get this response. I know they don't HAVE to answer, but damn is it so much trouble to just take 2 seconds to answer a simple question? Especially in a tickling chatroom? I mean that's what we're there for! Just a rant.

Didn't you know...........women are from Venus my friend. It is of course her right to answer or not, I wouldn't "chat" with her anymore if she doesn't want to play.

 

[Goodieluver]

Ticklishgiggle - I applaud you. You stuck it to the damn foot fetishists and I think that's what they need. Good for you!

Yes cuz we are all obsessive morons who keep pushing
God help ya if someone starts a thread from someone who isnt into tummy or other tickling and gets harassed about it, then we can start a thread about the "annoying arm pit lovers", hey, the AAPL, kinda has a ring to it

 

[theshire]

^^^

One thing I will also say about most foot fetishists is that they also don't understand simple arguments or make distinctions between what people say and what it sounds like they said if one doesn't take it in.

 

[Goodieluver]

^^^

One thing I will also say about most foot fetishists is that they also don't understand simple arguments or make distinctions between what people say and what it sounds like they said if one doesn't take it in.

Im just annoyed with the complaints(in general everywhere but still)
Hell, changin subjects, i dislike the m\m subjects or gettin msg'd by males to discuss tickling but i dont need to start a big whine fest about whats wrong.

 

[chicago]

Im just annoyed with the complaints(in general everywhere but still)
Hell, changin subjects, i dislike the m\m subjects or gettin msg'd by males to discuss tickling but i dont need to start a big whine fest about whats wrong.

But apparently a big whine fest about something annoying in the chatroom is fine, and definitely not been heard before either...

 

[Goodieluver]

But apparently a big whine fest about something annoying in the chatroom is fine, and definitely not been heard before either...

For the chatroom whine
"and the lord(myriads) said, let there be the ignore feature in chat"
problems solved

 

[chicago]

For the chatroom whine
"and the lord(myriads) said, let there be the ignore feature in chat"
problems solved

Exactly.

Note the person who started this thread. I wasn't complaining. I only explained why I didn't answer the question. That's it.

 

[tickledorange]

What if the person you ignored proclaims to the rest of the forum how much they hate you and how much they want to hurt you?

 

[chicago]

What if the person you ignored proclaims to the rest of the forum how much they hate you and how much they want to hurt you?

That's effed up.

 

[tickledorange]

Of course it is! 😀 That's why that person is never allowed to speak to me again.

 

[Avenger314]

Valium, make friends with it fast

I I only really PM people who quirk me intellectually, except avenger, whom will be destroyed someday by me

Bring it the fuck on 😀.

On a more serious note, I was hoping against hope that the original post was meant to be ironically sarcastic as opposed to a rant. Apparently, not the case.

In all seriousness, I come down about the middle between the two arguments. I'm not a male apologist, but nor am I (that bad of) a chauvnistic prick.

Technically, this is a tickle chat room. However, the problem comes with numbers. When a woman logs into the chat, she's likely to be hit by at least 2-3 PM's for tickling. Every time. Your odds of success are very low in 'getting through,' given that there are at least 2 others who are identical to you. Which is where Ann's post comes in--the more a person knows about you, the more they appreciate you as an individual. And the more they'll want to talk to you. Conversation works wonders.

Regarding the original post of indulging in your own fantasies, why do you need them to say yes? Given that you're largely into the solo fantasy, just fantasize the answer was yes. If it's all contingent on the answer to that one question, but no other questions would have followed that (I'm assuming that you wouldn't pester a woman with other feet questions after she said she wasn't into it), just remove the question. Thereby removing the vulnerability and dependency of your fantasy. Hell, every girl's feet are ticklish until you find out otherwise, every girl loves tickling until you find out otherwise, and no girl will slam you with a harassment suit until you actually harass her.

Gtg--need to babysit the box with Schroedinger's cat.

 

[steph]

(takes long deep breath...)

I was hoping someone else had the cajones to bring this up so I didn't have to but since no one does, here's a different POV. This is not aimed at anyone in particular, so please try not to take it personally even if you see yourself in it.

Person A (in this case, say, a female) goes to the trouble to create a screen name for themselves, they post in threads, maybe consent to do a video clip or post pics of themselves. THEN when Person B (male) responds as guys often do, Person A wants to whine about it. Not okay gang. What ever happened to manners?

For example, and this is just an example, since it was the question posed by the O.P., it costs nothing for the discussee to shrug it off and say, "I'm sorry dude, I'm strictly U.B" and terminate the discussion. See? That took me all of 5 seconds.
My point? Guys will always be, well, guys. If a gal is going to put themselves out there, be prepared to handle the attention gracefully. If you're going to be rude and speak to people like an ass, don't be surprised when people label you as such. End of rant.

XOXO

 

[BellaRisa]

I was hoping someone else had the cajones to bring this up so I didn't have to but since no one does, here's a different POV. This is not aimed at anyone in particular, so please try not to take it personally even if you see yourself in it.

Person A (in this case, say, a female) goes to the trouble to create a screen name for themselves, they post in threads, maybe consent to do a video clip or post pics of themselves. THEN when Person B (male) responds as guys often do, Person A wants to whine about it. Not okay gang. What ever happened to manners?

For example, and this is just an example, since it was the question posed by the O.P., it costs nothing for the discussee to shrug it off and say, "I'm sorry dude, I'm strictly U.B" and terminate the discussion. See? That took me all of 5 seconds.
My point? Guys will always be, well, guys. If a gal is going to put themselves out there, be prepared to handle the attention gracefully. If you're going to be rude and speak to people like an ass, don't be surprised when people label you as such. End of rant.

XOXO

I have a rather different point of view on this. Guys will be guys doesn't fly with me, and shouldn't with any woman past 21. Why we're conditioned to accept idiocy as the norm is beyond me. We teach people how to treat us, they learn from our reactions; a 'guy' can learn to be a gentleman if his 'guy' behavior isn't tolerated and gains him nothing but solitude. I have a screen name, I have pics and such, heck I'm the star of my own videos. And I still demand to be approached with respect-come correct or don't come at all. Furthermore, in my experience Person A doesn't get rude until Person B acts like a fool who can't take a hint and keeps asking and asking and asking and asking despite a series of polite yet firm rebuffs. You can only push a person so far before they become testy regarding your pestering.

Bella

 

[jim66e]

So whats the difference between saying "I'm not into feet" and "I'm strictly upper body" ? To me they seem to be saying the same thing. They both took the same amount of time to type. And really if a person is just into it to fulfil their fantasies, is the second statement going to stop them anymore than the first.

This thread topic makes me cringe. This stuff just makes it harder for a regular guy to have a conversation in the chatroom.

 

[Redmage]

For example, and this is just an example, since it was the question posed by the O.P., it costs nothing for the discussee to shrug it off and say, "I'm sorry dude, I'm strictly U.B" and terminate the discussion. See? That took me all of 5 seconds.
My point? Guys will always be, well, guys. If a gal is going to put themselves out there, be prepared to handle the attention gracefully. If you're going to be rude and speak to people like an ass, don't be surprised when people label you as such. End of rant.

Speaking as a guy, I don't agree. Women shouldn't have to just tolerate the way I choose to treat them simply because my glands produce more testosterone than theirs do.

Saying "I'm upper body only" seems the same to me as saying "I'm not into feet." Neither one answers the question of whether the feet are ticklish (which was CQ's original complaint), and both say "Sorry, I'm not into where this is going." I think they're both acceptable answers myself.

To be perfectly honest, I think that the real attitude problem is illustrated in the original post: "I didn't ASK what she's into, I don't CARE what she's into. Was just asking for my own fantasy purposes."

 

[LindyHopper]

To be perfectly honest, I think that the real attitude problem is illustrated in the original post: "I didn't ASK what she's into, I don't CARE what she's into. Was just asking for my own fantasy purposes."

I'll agree that that is far and away the biggest problem we're dealing with here. It's hard to fault ticklishgiggle, or anyone, for not wanting to be this guy's "interactive jerk-off toy."

Person A (in this case, say, a female) goes to the trouble to create a screen name for themselves, they post in threads, maybe consent to do a video clip or post pics of themselves. THEN when Person B (male) responds as guys often do, Person A wants to whine about it. Not okay gang. What ever happened to manners?

What indeed? 😛 I can see this issue from both sides. Me, I created a screen name (gender-neutral), and I post in threads (generally intelligent). I posted one video clip of my feet (in the discussion section, hee hee!). I don't have a sexy sig. I don't chat. The overall results of my pattern of behavior are a focus on what I have to say (as opposed to me being a tickle-toy), and the occasional (almost always respectful) appreciation of my feet. And I think the fact that I get to have the interactions I want, and avoid the ones I don't, is because of the choices I've made.

On the other hand, if a woman wants to visit the chatroom for the purpose of friendly, substantive conversation, she should be able to do so without being harassed. To draw an analogy, I think if you walk down the street dressed like a hooker, you shouldn't complain if people stare. On the other hand, merely being female shouldn't justify harrassment, and I think in the chatroom, mere female-ness (or reasonable facsimile thereof) means it's hard to do anything besides swat away ill-mannered men like mosquitoes.

Anyway, I know that nothing's ever going to change. So I will continue to avoid the chatroom, and women who want to use it will continue, I hope, standing up for themselves and not taking crap from anybody. 🙂

 

[Goodieluver]

Bring it the fuck on 😀.

How dare u think my blood vengence isnt serious! AHHHHH! Lemme see yer clippers pal, its on! Be damn lucky i cant do chat really anymore due to work, remember, i almost bested you and xod with a 102 fever brewing
🙂

 

[Goodieluver]

I have a rather different point of view on this. Guys will be guys doesn't fly with me, and shouldn't with any woman past 21. Why we're conditioned to accept idiocy as the norm is beyond me. We teach people how to treat us, they learn from our reactions; a 'guy' can learn to be a gentleman if his 'guy' behavior isn't tolerated and gains him nothing but solitude. I have a screen name, I have pics and such, heck I'm the star of my own videos. And I still demand to be approached with respect-come correct or don't come at all. Furthermore, in my experience Person A doesn't get rude until Person B acts like a fool who can't take a hint and keeps asking and asking and asking and asking despite a series of polite yet firm rebuffs. You can only push a person so far before they become testy regarding your pestering.

Bella

Sometimes person A gets annoyed with all the attention they get and then decide to blame the system or aspects of that system rather than blame the problem, which is themselves for putting themselves in that position.

 

[BellaRisa]

Sometimes person A gets annoyed with all the attention they get and then decide to blame the system or aspects of that system rather than blame the problem, which is themselves for putting themselves in that position.

While I'm sure there are exceptions, in general it's the type of attention rather than the attention itself. I have yet to hear of a woman 'round here who says that she's tired of all the polite and respectful TMF gentlemen.

Bella

 

[devilsadvocate]

this went on a lot longer than i thought it would

I was on the forum last night when the original post came up, i laughed to myself but i didnt think it'd go this far. Having never used the chat room myself (my computer screen just goes blank and never lets me see anything ) i wouldn't know what its all about. but it seems to me like the first big point is that some people dont follow the rules. only way to sort that problem out is, if someone IM's you without your permission, the best course of action is to just block them like msn messenger (is there a feature that does this?), ignore the messages or tell the mods. seems pretty simple.

the second point seems to be about persistance if ignored. now i'm no rocket scientist but i always figured if someone said no, they meant no. if you wish to continue the conversation, change back to a neutral topic. some people would counter that with "well it is a tickling forum, you should be ready to talk about that" hmm, that it may be, but if you do nothing but tickle people all day and all night then there really isn't much hope for you because there's way more to life than that.

the third issue i'm seeing is how do you deal with persistance. i like to think of a quote by goldfinger in the james bond books. 'once is coincedence, twice is happenstence, third time its enemy action.' basically three strikes and you're out. Dont put up with it, but give them a chance to prove they're not just interested in body parts. most people you meet can hold a conversation without mentioning tickling. most people can anyway.

The last issue ive picked up is about respect of either Person A or Person B. from person B's point of view, Person A is not in the chat room to fulfil your wildest fantasy. i believe that kind of thing is found in the personals section? end of discussion. find someone thats willing to talk about it, dont whine about someone that isn't. From Person A's point of view. unfortunately this kind of thing seems to happen a lot. Personally if i ever make it into the chat room, i'd like to be rejected from a tickling conversation politely and talk about something else. so my take on it is, if you think you've reached the absolute limit of patience. leave the chatroom and go back to PMs. they take longer but you do have a chance to calm down. (think this is my longest ever post. lol)

 

[Em Es]

To Steph

Steph, sweet, darling, Steph, you said, "Guys will always be, well, guys. If a gal is going to put themselves out there, be prepared to handle the attention gracefully. If you're going to be rude and speak to people like an ass, don't be surprised when people label you as such."

Who could have put it better? You of course are not blaming the victim, as no guy can use the excuse of "being a guy" by speaking impolitely to or intimidating a woman. But, as you said, a woman putting on a show should not get high and mighty when a man gives her the attention she seeks.

Reading your comments, Steph, reminded me of how it's been my loss that I have not kept up private communication with you as I once did. You are awesome.

love,

"Homey" Em Es

 

[steph]

Thanks Homey~always great to hear from you love!

And for the other comments, thanks gang, glad we can keep this civil. Some really iteresting thoughts here.

Let me clarify my comments a little bit if I may. If someone asks you a direct question and you step around it, you haven't answered the question. My off-the-cuff, "I'm into U.B. only, I'm sorry, have a great night" just seems to me a gentler, better way to diffuse the questioner without making them feel like a jerk.

Now, that said, I am not saying we have to accept guys acting like buffoons because we don't. I'm just saying we ARE different creatures and we do communicate differently. We do something, they may perceive it as something else. Now, I've never been in TMF chat. I don't go into it on other forums either, but I have in the past and I can tell you this~people act the same. The "unwanted attention" towards the girls is not indigenous to the TMF. Guys are jerking off to us, both here and in real life, whether we like it or not. If we're feeding that we need to learn how to be accountable for the part we play in it.

What I'm trying to say is there's no call to be rude to these guys. You can be civil and assert yourself without sounding bitchy, especially if you're calling attention to yourself in the first place. That's all. 😀

XOXO

Steph, sweet, darling, Steph, you said, "Guys will always be, well, guys. If a gal is going to put themselves out there, be prepared to handle the attention gracefully. If you're going to be rude and speak to people like an ass, don't be surprised when people label you as such."

Who could have put it better? You of course are not blaming the victim, as no guy can use the excuse of "being a guy" by speaking impolitely to or intimidating a woman. But, as you said, a woman putting on a show should not get high and mighty when a man gives her the attention she seeks.

Reading your comments, Steph, reminded me of how it's been my loss that I have not kept up private communication with you as I once did. You are awesome.

love,

"Homey" Em Es

 

[Bagelfather]

move on

I'm in the chatroom tonight and I ask someone if her soles are ticklish. All she keeps saying is "I'm not into feet". I didn't ASK what she's into, I don't CARE what she's into. Was just asking for my own fantasy purposes. I know there's nothing that says she HAS to answer. It just irritates me when women answer this way for no apparent reason: "I'm not into feet" and I ask women at random on AOL all the time and sometimes I get this response. I know they don't HAVE to answer, but damn is it so much trouble to just take 2 seconds to answer a simple question? Especially in a tickling chatroom? I mean that's what we're there for! Just a rant.

If someone says that, move on, seriously. People are not here to answer your questions for your own personal fantasies, people are here to chat to interact. Sometimes they get bothered by this question so often they just don't want to deal with it, or they REALLY are not into it and don't want to discuss it.

Dude.. move on it's only a question. I get questions all the time I blow off for one reason or another.

 

[LindyHopper]

Guys are jerking off to us, both here and in real life, whether we like it or not. If we're feeding that we need to learn how to be accountable for the part we play in it.

What I'm trying to say is there's no call to be rude to these guys. You can be civil and assert yourself without sounding bitchy, especially if you're calling attention to yourself in the first place. That's all. 😀

Huh. You seem to be implying that merely going into the chat room (or even being on this forum?) admitting to being female makes you "accountable," because you're "calling attention to yourself." In other words, if you're a female wanting to chat, you're "asking for it," and are obligated to be nice to every guy asking impertinent questions. Sorry, I just can't get behind that.

 

[Redmage]

To draw an analogy, I think if you walk down the street dressed like a hooker, you shouldn't complain if people stare. On the other hand, merely being female shouldn't justify harrassment, and I think in the chatroom, mere female-ness (or reasonable facsimile thereof) means it's hard to do anything besides swat away ill-mannered men like mosquitoes.

I'd say that if a woman dresses that way then she should expect to get looks. Hopefully that's why she's doing it. However she shouldn't expect or have to tolerate gropes or inappropriate comments, and men shouldn't have any expectation that a woman dressed that way is supposed to serve their fantasies.