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This seems wrong to me.

Bugman

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Okay. I know our society has gotten a lot more casual over the last 20 or 30 years. Some of that is probably for the better.

Today I was driving past a large church in South Austin, where a funeral service was about to begin or just ending. I saw more then a few people standing on the front steps or in the front parking lot wearing shorts, t-shirts and flip flops.

Is it asking too much these days for people to dress in an appropriate manner for something like this? Am I just an out of touch old fogey?
 
In my opinion, it's not about how you dress that shows respect, it's about how you conduct yourself. If they were outside wearing these things, acting like assholes and laughing with each other, then that would be another story. But if they're just in their casual wear and mourning like everyone else, why should they feel the need to be more uncomfortable than a funeral already is?
 
As hot as it gets down in Texas, I'd imagine dressy clothing is pretty uncomfortable to wear. It's rather uncomfortable even here during the summer.
 
It depends on what the deceased wanted. When I die, the last thing I want is people moping around, crying, wearing black and passing eachother tissues. I want people laughing and telling stories about stupid shit I've done (Slacker is obligated to tell the story of the day we met :facepalm:), wearing bright colors and breaking open pinatas or something. In that instance, someone dressing "in an appropriate manner for something like this" would be disrespectful - or at the very least against my wishes.

In short, you really can't cast judgment without having all the facts.
 
When my sister was killed in 2005, her funeral took place on a day when it was 90 degrees at 10am. After the funeral, I gathered a few of the mourners and told them this was not the way to put my sister to rest. We all changed, went out and had a GREAT time at a local watering hole...it's all about the person, I guess.
I still wear black to a funeral, though.
 
Okay. I know our society has gotten a lot more casual over the last 20 or 30 years. Some of that is probably for the better.

Today I was driving past a large church in South Austin, where a funeral service was about to begin or just ending. I saw more then a few people standing on the front steps or in the front parking lot wearing shorts, t-shirts and flip flops.

Is it asking too much these days for people to dress in an appropriate manner for something like this? Am I just an out of touch old fogey?

I've been to enough funerals and wakes to answer this question.
Funerals and wakes are super uncomfortable. I hate them and if I could avoid going to all future ones, I would.
On the way from the funeral house to the church, and from the church to the cemetary, people dress up....and what is worn varies widely. Guys go in pants and a dress shirt all the way to three piece suit. Women look nice...but outfits vary greatly.

To answer you question, Bugaboo......I haven't seen anyone come to a funeral in shorts, a tee, and flip flops.
 
At my funeral, I demand that mourners tear their garments and cover their faces in ashes. And no one is allowed to bathe, tell jokes, or have sex for forty days or nights, either.
 
I totally agree with you. Certain occasions or situations should demand appropriate attire. For if not, then I guess when I get married, I can wear jeans, sneakers, and a t shirt 🙂.
 
I agree, unless there are special circumstances like Skippy eluded to. Sure, the most important part of attending a funeral is that you behave in a respectful manner, but at least make an honest effort. For the guys, I'd say a dress shirt and khaki pants are a good place to start.
 
One should never wear sandals or flip-flops to church or synagogue, but nice conservative laced-up Oxfords like Moses and Jesus did.
 
Suits and fancy dresses are expensive. I also agree with skip.
 
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I believe that people should dress appropriately for the occasion. However if the deceased had never worn a suit, a more casual dress would be okay. However I feel that t-shirts, unshod feet and blue jeans is disrespectful.
 
Skipadeedoodah was pretty much right on the nose about this. It all just depends on the person.

I know a guy who genuinely wants to have his ashes spread over Lambeau field when he dies and have all the mourners show up for the ceremony decked out in NFL gear with their favorite team.
 
For that matter I will state in my will that I don't want anyone to come to my funeral; I let the priest and attorneys to handle that.
 
Okay. I know our society has gotten a lot more casual over the last 20 or 30 years. Some of that is probably for the better.

Today I was driving past a large church in South Austin, where a funeral service was about to begin or just ending. I saw more then a few people standing on the front steps or in the front parking lot wearing shorts, t-shirts and flip flops.

Is it asking too much these days for people to dress in an appropriate manner for something like this? Am I just an out of touch old fogey?



If they weren't wearing shorts and flip-flops, would the person be less dead?

I am pretty certain that the person being buried didn't care what anyone was wearing.

It's like dressing up on the job. Does how I dress affect how well I do my job? In some industries, sure (if I need protective gear or if I need to make an impression on old fashioned traditionalists). But a lot of the time, doing the job is doing the job; as long as shit gets done and done well, what does it matter what you're wearing?
 
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