where are all the women??

[linylons]

I think that alot of guys have the misconception that because they are in somewhat of a hurry to meet up and play, and that they don't necessarily need to get to know someone to do it, that girls into tickling are going to feel the same way. I don't think it necessarily indicates there's anything super wrong with the guy. Someone just needs to let him know.

So now you know 🙂 You're gonna need to put a little effort into getting to know someone and developing a connection before most girls will want to have a session with you. And by connection I don't mean asking her 50,000 questions about where she's most ticklish. Let her get to know you (and you her) outside of the fetish. People want to know more that you're a man and a ler before they put themselves into such a compromising and vulnerable position for you.

Good luck.

Thanks for the positive feedback, I totally understand

 

[linylons]

I like how everyone immediately assumes there's something wrong with the guy. Because this place is just overflowing with people who want to meet up, after all.

Right?? Did I shoot somebody or something?? relax people!! If taking cheap shots @ me over my humble opinion is your thing........ there might be something wrong with u

 

[Sunriseticklee]

SIMMER DOWN! (Forgive me. I'm on Spring Break, so I haven't had to quiet a room down in 6 days. I'm going through withdraw.)

Anyway... LOL I have often wondered why it was so hard to meet someone. At first I just thought GA was a black hole- I tried the vanilla route too. Worked really well when I wanted guys to tickle me. BUT I'm a switch. And well... it kinda scared most of my vanilla guys away when I wanted to tickle them back.

It's about location, building relationships, sometimes it is even about who you know. Sometimes it is about the women you approach. Maybe they aren't ready, or maybe they like to keep it online, or maybe they are just simply not interested. We all know that lots of us talk a good tickle game, but when it is time to meet.... GHOST TOWN! LOL And I don't mean "WE" as in those of us who are actively involved... I mean we as the majority of the people on this forum are in lurk status. (NOT saying that lurkers get no play. BTW)

Ok.... So if you wanna play with someone, get on the scene. Start going to munches and stuff- Even if you have to drive. Don't just rely on the TK scene. There are a lot of TK lovers who are into BDSM as well. Maybe check out Fetlife and see who is in your area.

There are NEVER guarantees that some chick is gonna play with you. Sometimes the stars align and the heavens open up, and a bare foot falls in your lap. Other times you run into someone like me. At the moment- I am such a tickler *****! If 2 guys and 2 girls came up to me and said "TICKLE ME" right now, I'd be game.... But then again, I'm on Spring Break grading papers... BORED! LOL And other times, you hit like a 4 year dry spell. Shrug- it happens. There are some folks who haven't tickled anyone since college, and they are like 42 years old.

Depends on the girl, on the mood, on you, and where you are living.

Kay.... Bye
Sunny

 

[goddess_nemesis]

Why is it so hard to meet up with a female for a tickle session?

^ Every once in a while, this and various versions of this question get asked. Like any question that gets repeated, some people get so annoyed, they can't help but rag on the person who asked it. He's not a troll; he's just ignorant.

I think that alot of guys have the misconception that because they are in somewhat of a hurry to meet up and play, and that they don't necessarily need to get to know someone to do it, that girls into tickling are going to feel the same way. I don't think it necessarily indicates there's anything super wrong with the guy. Someone just needs to let him know.

So now you know 🙂 You're gonna need to put a little effort into getting to know someone and developing a connection before most girls will want to have a session with you. And by connection I don't mean asking her 50,000 questions about where she's most ticklish. Let her get to know you (and you her) outside of the fetish. People want to know more that you're a man and a ler before they put themselves into such a compromising and vulnerable position for you.

Good luck.

^ And this is the perfect answer to that question.

It's always hard to find someone to play with. So it also takes a lot of patience.

Also consider attending munches and/or gatherings. Those are great places to meet people face-to-face without expectations and get to know each other. Who knows, you could meet someone you click so well with that you'll be able to eventually plan a session. 😀

 

[WheresThe Clip?]

He's not a troll; he's just ignorant.

Well I'm glad we cleared that up.

It always seems to me that the people who are quickest to preach/condemn anyone here are those who have a nice little tickle domestic situation going on, and then can lord it over everyone here who hasn't.

So the first problem given that there is a mass of male ticklers here looking to meet female ticklees from a small pool, is that it is a sellers market (i.e. it is easier if you are a female lee to get what you want then vice versa).

So what are the approaches suggested here.

1) Develop normal relationships with women. So yes, that is a good approach for a long term relationship, but it is a case that you have to be someway into a relationship before you start swapping real intimate details about actual preferences (beyond the usual). So if that person reveals they hate tickling, do you then drop them like a ton of bricks (real social skills that)? Or do you compromise and have your tickle fetish cause problems a few years down the line.

2) Go to gatherings. Sounds simple, except that it is not easy to find one that is happening in your city (or in my case continent). Yet even if there is, we all know how clique these things can be, and how you can be easily left on the outside if you don't make an immediate impression. However the real problem with gatherings which noone ever mentions, is that not everyone wants to play in public with lots of other people around (yuk).

3) Continue to pay for it, and treat it as a hobby. Good option in my book, as you help the economy go round, get what you want and it is hassle free. After all if you are in a relationship, one way or another you are paying and you are unlikely to get everything you want there. Also if you are really smart, pay for it, video the results, and get other people to pay for it on clips4sale, thus finding a way to fund your hobby, as well as giving you the opportunity to be sanctimonious with everyone else.

 

[Sunriseticklee]

Well I'm glad we cleared that up.

It always seems to me that the people who are quickest to preach/condemn anyone here are those who have a nice little tickle domestic situation going on, and then can lord it over everyone here who hasn't.

So the first problem given that there is a mass of male ticklers here looking to meet female ticklees from a small pool, is that it is a sellers market (i.e. it is easier if you are a female lee to get what you want then vice versa).

Yeah.... well, not all of us approached the guy in a negative way, and not all of us are like that. "Sanctimonious"

Everyone is entitled to their opinions and their brand of advice. Even if you or we feel as if the advice was a bit ineffective, I see no difference in assuming that the guy is an asshole with no social skills (No I am not insinuating that he is.), or assuming that everyone else who is in a relationship is being an asshole because, Whooptee Doo... our lives are so great!

I think you had some pretty good advice, but you weren't the only one who did.

I don't get it how simple threads turn into THIS almost all the time. Sigh!

 

[BMoreTklr]

I agree with Sunrise. I mean I do feel like finding a potential lee for play time on TMF is possible, just as it is in everyday life, but it requires social skills as someone pointed out earlier, and a lack of thirstiness (read: obvious overzealous obsession for something that you are looking to get from someone else). On another note, just because someone posts a thread with this subject, doesn't mean the original poster expects to come on TMF, PM a potential lee and they're just like "oh great, because I was on TMF hoping and waiting for a ler to PM me to get my tickling fix".

 

[WheresThe Clip?]

Yeah.... well, not all of us approached the guy in a negative way, and not all of us are like that. "Sanctimonious"

Everyone is entitled to their opinions and their brand of advice. Even if you or we feel as if the advice was a bit ineffective, I see no difference in assuming that the guy is an asshole with no social skills (No I am not insinuating that he is.), or assuming that everyone else who is in a relationship is being an asshole because, Whooptee Doo... our lives are so great!

I think you had some pretty good advice, but you weren't the only one who did.

I don't get it how simple threads turn into THIS almost all the time. Sigh!

OFF TOPIC WARNING

It does seem to me Sunrise, that whenever I contribute to a thread that you happen to be a part of it, you get seriously narked. I think it is because you are still pissed at me because I suggested in another thread that it wasn't a good idea to have/seek a male best buddy to discuss tickle matters with outside of your marraige. GET OVER IT.

 

[Sunriseticklee]

OFF TOPIC WARNING

It does seem to me Sunrise, that whenever I contribute to a thread that you happen to be a part of it, you get seriously narked. I think it is because you are still pissed at me because I suggested in another thread that it wasn't a good idea to have/seek a male best buddy to discuss tickle matters with outside of your marraige. GET OVER IT.

You're sexy when you're angry. You are trying to find someone to argue with and I win! WOOHOO I'm flattered, really. 😉

How can I be angry at you. I actually think/ thought you are pretty cool. We've agreed and disagreed on certain threads, I guess, but I don't keep count. It even took me a second to actually remember what you were talking about. You have to assume that for me to be mad at you, you have to actually matter to me.

🙁 AND YOU DO! OMG.... I LOVE YOU SO MUCH! WHY DON'T YOU LOVE ME BACK?!!!! WHYYYYYYYYYYYYY! I AM SOOOOO OBSESSED WITH YOU THAT I FOLLOW YOU ON THREADS AND CONTRADICT WHAT YOU SAY JUST TO GET YOUR ATTENTION! PLEASE LOVE ME! PLEASE!!!!!

Blahahaha!

Sunny


P.S. Did I already say that I love you?

 

[Avenger314]

You forgot to offer cookies, natch 🙂

 

[TonyTheTongue]

The women are everywhere!!

Sunriseticklee is looking to mingle. She has a husband that will take care of all the other stuff not involved with sex. Get at her.

 

[Sunriseticklee]

The women are everywhere!!

Sunriseticklee is looking to mingle. She has a husband that will take care of all the other stuff not involved with sex. Get at her.

Tell it like it is TonyTheTongue.... Oh Wait!!! Was that an insult or .....

I am confused!
*giggle

 

[RobAce]

In my many years apart of the community and this forum I certainly agree that 90% of the problem lies in communication. I have had the honor and privilege of meeting many women in this community. I have also had the good fortune that many of the ladies I have met, I got to play with and some of those on a regular basis, and I can say with all honesty I have never paid anyone. It is all about getting to know people and at the same time letting them get to know you.

I would say more than half of my play partners were lurkers on this very forum. Never posted once. But they read what is going on, look at pictures and get a general feel for people through their words. I have had a lot of women PM me first asking general stuff or asking me to expand on a thread I made they wanted to know more about. After talking for a while ( I have a set timeframe that I will not play with someone until I get to know them and I am comfortable with them) and the time seems right we (as in a discussion, not me saying...OK lets tickle now) discuss plans and I always give them plenty of time to make sure they want to do it. I make sure they know it is their decision, I am the one that is lucky to have the chance to play with them and that they ultimately control what we do or don't do.

When ladies in the first place are often treated as a friend once put it "yummy little cheeseburgers" they seem to find it refreshing that someone would put the ladies concerns, fears, reservations and feelings above their own.

Simply put, the best way is to be a gentleman, communicate and be willing to let people know about you.

Nice guys in some circles may finish last....but in the fetish world, nice guys are adored and desired. Well at least in my 18 plus years in this community they are.

Rob

 

[asutickler]

It always seems to me that the people who are quickest to preach/condemn anyone here are those who have a nice little tickle domestic situation going on, and then can lord it over everyone here who hasn't.

To an extent, I'd agree. But you have to remember that these are folks who have gotten what the others are looking for... Ergo they know the path, and the first step in that path is "develop some social skills and treat women like people." Even if someone is just looking to pay a girl for a tickle session, I'm sure that said girl will be a lot more friendly and amenable if they're approached in the right way.

 

[maniactickler]

I think the only real shot you have is to go to gatherings and hope for the best. social skills dont do squat for you if your looking for one on one tickling. ive been on here 8 years and only met 3 women. god knows ive tried using the proper social skills only to be ignored completely by almost everyone ive talked to. especially local girls. but ive always said the New England Area is an empty wasteland of female lees. i still stand by that.

 

[Phineas]

For the first time I am going to use this term with a straight face...

I've never seen women objectified so much in my life. 0_o Maybe it was just how I read the question, but man it comes off like I would ask about a PS3 at a LAN party. "I'm not against paying to use this PS3, but man couldn't there be a free option somewhere? I thought this was a LAN party!"

Just... wow.

On the other hand, as soon as you come into the forum you're treated to ads galore for tickling clips, and there are a lot of models and dommes who hang around here hawking their wares, as it were. So I honestly can't blame the guy for thinking "hey, why is there a price tag attached to everything around here? Why can't I just, like, meet someone who won't present me with a bill?"

 

[MikefromPA]

This place is also quite similar to a lot of other online communities in that if you look at the "Welcome to the TMF" threads new guy = maybe 2 or 3 replies saying welcome; new girl = 4 pages of drooling all over her. It's just the way the internet works.

 

[Sunriseticklee]

This place is also quite similar to a lot of other online communities in that if you look at the "Welcome to the TMF" threads new guy = maybe 2 or 3 replies saying welcome; new girl = 4 pages of drooling all over her. It's just the way the internet works.

Tis true...

 

[socktickler86]

On the other hand, as soon as you come into the forum you're treated to ads galore for tickling clips, and there are a lot of models and dommes who hang around here hawking their wares, as it were. So I honestly can't blame the guy for thinking "hey, why is there a price tag attached to everything around here? Why can't I just, like, meet someone who won't present me with a bill?"

I gotta say i don't necessarily agree. In my albeit short tenure here, I have only seen maybe 2 threads for females looking to do tickle sessions with guys for a fee.

Then again, maybe I'm not looking hard enough or don't pay attention.... but that's my opinion.

 

[Skipadeedoodah]

I think the only real shot you have is to go to gatherings and hope for the best. social skills dont do squat for you if your looking for one on one tickling.

I totally disagree. I've met a few men here who have never attended a gathering and had one-on-one sessions with them. They were polite, funny, and we spent some time getting to know each other before planning a session. It's definitely possible. You just have to meet someone you click with.

 

[Harpyduster]

Skipadeedoodah has a lot of well articulated wisdom on the topic.

My take on why women don't put themselves out in the open as 'lees ready for a good time is because tickling requires a lot of trust whether it's for fun or more than that. Being tickled much less being ticklish puts a person in a very vulnerable position that is easily abused hence the trust requirement. From personal, real life experiences, I've had a lot of bad ones as a child because I was small, weak and non-combative back then. A lot of people don't want to be tickled by a stranger or even by friends if they suspect that the other person might go too far or not respect the 'lee's wishes.

As a woman, I'm quick to be skeeved out by guys who cut to the chase with the tickling (or in the chatroom, pc requests). My attitude is: I don't know you, why would I let a total stranger touch me much less attempt to cyber? Would a man ask a stranger to talk dirty to him in person? Of course not. The same sensibilities apply online- treat people with decency and dignity and you'll get a better response. I mean, the construction workers who hoot and holler at the ladies don't often see reciprocated sentiments so why would the equivalent tactic work online? As everyone else has been saying here, you need to make the effort to get to know a woman outside the fetish.

 

[Jagermeistered]

All the ladies in this thread hit the common sense homerun in this thread... Their is more to being just a ticklephile: on the Internet, in the public, or even in private. I also want to give a to Cavum. Being social outside of your box is important! Their is more to the 'duel of sex' than just a tickle session, followed by getting action!

If the OP wants a one-sided attraction venue, keep coughing up the money. But, if you want an actual partner... It's a two-sided equation. It's called friendship and relationship.

For myself, the TMF is not ruled in or out, but a venue to meet great people. If I meet a lady here, awesome (and, fuck you match.com). If I meet a lady around where I live, and is ticklish. Awesome too! And, if I need advice, this will be my one-stop shop.

 

[Ano-Nymous]

I like how everyone immediately assumes there's something wrong with the guy. Because this place is just overflowing with people who want to meet up, after all.

This.

Granted, but being in possession of social skills is no guarantee of it being easy to meet someone here, if gatherings are taken out of the picture.

I used to wonder why it was hard to meet someone here, too. Now, I just shrug and get on with my life. It's funny, though. You'd think a tickling forum would be a good place to meet people into tickling, but it doesn't really work that way.

OP;

As I've said, the odds are stacked against you. Once you take away the married women, involved women, lesbians, women who are too old/too young, aren't open to meeting anyone at all, women you don't find attractive/women who don't find you attractive, women who are only here to make money, and women who aren't reasonably able to travel to you (or you to them), you're left with a microscopic pool to choose from. Then, you have to hope by some miracle that you're compatible enough that she will eventually want to meet you as a friend/mate first, because few, if any, women simply meet up with random strangers on the Internet. It's daunting, to say the least.

That is, assuming you're not a total creeper. Which, as has been pointed out, is a possibility.

And this.

From the view of a woman who was looking for a specific sort of guy (nice, honest, available, thoughtful) this made the most sense, with a good attitude, which is in short supply on most public forums.

LINYLONS I'd meet you before most (if you're not too young 😛 ) if I find myself looking again. You were very pleasant in spite of the many assaults you received from the less discerning.

There is a completely different attitude toward tickling within those who are naturally into this, rather than those for whom it's an artificial or acquired interest. And it's still different if someone is to be paid for it, as many do advertise here, via video companies and also in the personals. I was in the minority as a single woman looking for a single guy. Some of those for whom this is an acquired interest may sincerely enjoy it or look for it (if they're paid you probably can't know for sure that it's not just business on their end) but you'd hope to find someone here who feels the same deep-seated thrill... Yours was a good thread and I'd keep you in mind 🙂

 

[Bohemianne]

Where are all the women?

We're just around but some of us are not looking for date anymore.

 

[linylons]

This.



And this.

From the view of a woman who was looking for a specific sort of guy (single, no gf or wife to hurt, 40's so I don't feel like an old woman, etc.) this made the most sense, with a good attitude, which is in short supply on most public forums.

LINYLONS I'd meet you before most (if you're not too young 😛 ) if I find myself looking again. You were very pleasant in spite of the many assaults you received from the less discerning.

There is a completely different attitude toward tickling within those who are naturally into this, rather than those for whom it's an artificial or acquired interest. And it's still different if someone is to be paid for it, as many do advertise here, via video companies and also in the personals. I was in the minority as a single woman looking for a single guy. Some of those for whom this is an acquired interest may sincerely enjoy it or look for it (if they're paid you probably can't know for sure that it's not just business on their end) but you'd hope to find someone here who feels the same deep-seated thrill... Yours was a good thread and I'd keep you in mind 🙂

Thanks for the kind words 🙂