Can you take a compliment?

[Jackpot$]

My girlfriend Scarlett says I remind her of Thurston Howell III. Now that's a compliment I take very well!

 

[TicklishLurker]

If its a "sincere, legit,compliment", why would I wanna hurt said the person? Nope.I tend to just be grateful for it.And like I said, my BS meter is accurate enough.

Because of what I said in my original post - either not wanting to appear vain or low self esteem or a combonation thereof.

 

[Krokus]

Nope, never liked em, never will. I'm a firm believer in hidden agendas, and everyone has one.

 

[Mr.Tickler]

Because of what I said in my original post - either not wanting to appear vain or low self esteem or a combonation thereof.

1st off,though, If I am really,truly grateful/pleased with an honest compliment, most people who delivered it will know and pick up on my response to it as honest.That's just how it generally works out.Most (not all) people don't wanna compliment someone they see as vain or arrogant.I grew up with more or less low-self esteem, so if they say it & really mean it, I'll thank em',downplay it, and move on.I gave up trying to be too concerned with what others think of me, 'cause too much of that is vanity.If I'm not happy with something about myself, mostly what others feel is gonna fall by the wayside anyway.Pure & simple.

 

[slap'n'ticklee]

Nope, I'm not good at taking compliments in any way shape or form. This could be because recently I have lost a lot of weight and now starting to get the compliments about my appearance and I suppose over the years of being bigger I hated and detested myself and think others feel or think the same way when they see me. As the weight has dropped off and I'm getting the compliments I do throw it back, which can be hurtful with the way I react sometimes to it and feel ashamed for, especially only recently one of my Directors at work has been giving me compliments recently saying how good I'm looking etc and everytime I say 'no I'm not and where's your glasses', and he has said if you keep on denying or throwing back a compliment he won't say it again, as he means it and can be hurtful.

I have started to say thanks and move on with the conversation before I open my mouth and say what my 'faults' are.

I also give compliments to family/friends and to be honest, I don't like being on the receiving end of them when they are thrown back at me as I always say it with sincerity and that hurts my feelings when they don't accept it as such.

 

[chicago]

If it's something I'm proud of, that I know I'm good at, something I know I accomplished, then I can take the compliment well. It someone compliments my writing, then I'm all, "Yeah, I know. Thanks." lol

Most of the time it's compliments on things I can't control that make me get all girly and blushy, like how I look, how I laugh, stuff like that.

 

[steph]

"Can you take a compliment?"

Yeah, but it took a long time, a lot of really great friends. I had to teach myself.

XOXO

 

[jersey_tickler]

I like you just the way you are, Steph, and I can't wait to meet you and Prime when i finally go to Cali in 07. Don't know when, but you'll know LOL

 

[LindyHopper]

I don't mean compliments you know are BS. I'm talking about can you take a sincere, legit compliment? Or do you do what I do and throw it back in peoples' faces, even if it hurts them?

But... if you know that the compliment is sincere, and legit, then why would you reject it? It just doesn't make any sense.

Myself? I can envision myself as attractive, personable, friendly, affable, and in certain circumstances, outgoing. I'm not these things all the time, but I know that I can be, and so, I accept compliments pretty well and with no suspicion of the complimenter -- provided the compliments are congruent to the range of my self-perception. That's the key to accepting compliments, as it is with any data -- the degree to which it is congruent with perecption. But if someone started calling me some great Adonis or some crap, I'd know they're pulling my leg, and more than likely are being sarcastic, not an idiot or pitying -- though the way in which they deliver the compliment would largely dictate how it is interpreted...

Well said, Capn! That sounds pretty psychologically healthy to me. It makes me very sad when people can't accept the sincerity of a well-meant compliment because their self-image is too terrible for them to believe it.

if someone compliments my personality, again it does feel good as i always like to make people feel good. i thank them and go about the conversation. i guess i have good self esteem about myself as i know i am a good person, who loves to be around people. i also like to give compliments as well. why hide them?

I agree. If you see something you feel is worth complimenting, you should go ahead and say it. Compliments make the world a happier place, or at least they should. And when people duck or deny these compliments, that's just a bummer.

Most of the time it's compliments on things I can't control that make me get all girly and blushy, like how I look, how I laugh, stuff like that.

Yeah, that's kind of a weird one. For example, I've been told by a few foot connoisseurs that I have exceptionally beautiful feet, and while I find that flattering, there's not much I can do with it. On the other hand, I've been told by a non-tickling friend of mine, "You have wonderful laugh!" and that made me feel great, even if it is something I can't control. Maybe it's because I feel like my laugh has at least a little to do with me as a person, while the appearance of my feet does not.

My girlfriend Scarlett says I remind her of Thurston Howell III. Now that's a compliment I take very well!

Good God, you must be bored!

 

[isabeau]

o right..of course if i'm complimented on how good i performed on my flute at a particular event...or if i'm complimented on a speech i gave..i won't self deprecate myself..because i know i am good on my flute..and a not bad speech giver back in my day..even thought i made some rather funny mistakes..i mean embarrassing to say the least..but still funny...i have a great speaking voice..i'll give myself that..and also a fantastic flute player..ok enough self promotion..

 

[TicklishLurker]

But... if you know that the compliment is sincere, and legit, then why would you reject it? It just doesn't make any sense.

I already answered that -

Because either you don't want to appear vain or because of low self esteem, or some combonation thereof.

I do it because I hate myself. I can't accept a compliment on my looks. (Singing is another matter - you know you're good when a person informs you that they hate you as a person, but they love your singing, or when someone who has totally different musical tastes then what you sing tells you you're good.) But some people I've know do it for the former reason. Their parents always told them to never be vain or they won't have any friends. So they thought that to not appear vain they had to reject compliments.

 

[BikerBadBoy]

compliment

o right..of course if i'm complimented on how good i performed on my flute at a particular event...or if i'm complimented on a speech i gave..i won't self deprecate myself..because i know i am good on my flute..and a not bad speech giver back in my day..even thought i made some rather funny mistakes..i mean embarrassing to say the least..but still funny...i have a great speaking voice..i'll give myself that..and also a fantastic flute player..ok enough self promotion..

Yes Isabeau.....you do play the......um.....flute........very well.

 

[Redmage]

If I get a compliment, then I figure there are three possible reasons....

1) It's a social formality - the sort of thing that one says to be polite.

2) The person giving the compliment is trying to flatter me in order to get something.

3) They really mean it.

Now, #2 is really pretty rare, and not too hard to spot. #1 is common, but still not hard to recognize. If I've ruled out #1 and #2, then I'm left with #3. In that case, if I still don't agree, I think it's good to consider that I might be missing something that they see.

 

[steph]

Oooooooooooooooooooo!

Thank you jerz~what a lovely compliment! (See how easy that was, out there, some of you?) 😀 I'll leave the light on for ya!

Look, gang, here's the way I see it. If I compliment you, I mean it. If I take time out of my busy day to say something nice about you and you basically give me the "tell it to the hand," your friendship with me will probably be a short one. Do you get the picture? It's like spitting in someone's face.
XOXO

I like you just the way you are, Steph, and I can't wait to meet you and Prime when i finally go to Cali in 07. Don't know when, but you'll know LOL

 

[jersey_tickler]

Love ya Stephy, keep up your maternal instincts that always meet and warm the hearts of everybody here at TMF.

Did I mention I would love to tickle you LOL

 

[Ticklerguy4u]

I usually watch how the compliment is stated. If a person is complimenting me on something I did or the way I look and is sincere about it I will usually agree with them or disagree. I depends on how "I" see it. I will merely say thank you.

However, I hate when someone gives me a compliment to merit "making me feel better." ...Im like..."spare me the patronizing"

In my experience I've learned there is one opinion that counts. It's your own. If a person doesn't like how you look or who you are. Then it won't affect your self-esteem.

IF a person does like what you look like or who you are..it doesn't affect your self-esteem.

Bottom line is..if you don't agree with it you have two options. Fix it to your liking or accept that it "IS WHAT IT IS." and move on.

If you like yourself and/or what you do then everything else is a moot point.