Do you refuse to suck a binky, and hate the word PWN?

[Myriads]

Helena,

I've known you for a long time, and though we do not speak as often as we once did back in the early part of this decade (In general I don't speak to anyone as much as I did then, something that has been pointed out to me recently) I still count you as one of the people whom I'm always happy to see posting, and interacting with the community here on the forum.

This thread took off in a few directions, and got heated in a number of ways. But I think that the core point of your post was this:

"I'm not feeling at home in a place that I once always did. And it makes me feel sad and frustrated to have this happen. Does anyone else feel like I do? What is happening to my web home?"

I see this feeling around the forum a lot these days, and spoke to it at length in a past a few days back. I see it as a very real issue, and one that is natural in a community of our nature at this point in it's development. I also feel its a VERY important topic and issue.

This thread has show me that everyone in it shares some things in common.

Each and every one of you cares about the TMF.

Each and every one of you feels very strongly about seeing it succeed, and work, and be a place to enjoy and share in.

What you differ in, is how those ends are reached, and that is the root of every single conflict in this thread. You are all defending the forum out of care.

The strength of the TMF that I have always worked to build is that it is inclusive. To me that is the real reason this forum has lasted eight years. That we have consistantly worked to include the widest array of opinions and perhaps more importantly PERSONALITES.

Some folks are disruptive. Others are sarcastic, some seem outright unballanced at times. And I've allowed them to stay. As long as they don't cross a line that I've defined as 'Harming the forum' they get to stay. Why? because they bring life and energy to the place. They expose us to new ideas and outlooks, and overturn the apple cart of what I and others expect.

That's good. It causes growth. It brings energy for change. It makes us more. It's not always comfortable. Change never is, as it's something that is outside our control, and we may loose things in it's wake that we value. Never knowing if we'll get a better thing in replacement.

Strong personalities create divisions by just being. They come to represent groups, and those become factions or cliques. And from there we end up with so many of the things that Helena is feeling in her OP.

But one should always remember that while the strong personalities represent groups, there is a second group, the silent one. The quieter folks who watch, and enjoy things they find here, and represent the center of the community. The solid whole, that the Strong folks orbit about, and try to pull one way or the other.

That center rarely moves. It does, over time, mostly due to demographic change, but it's pretty resistant otherwise.

Helena, the community you loved and cared about is still here. It's just not as outspoken and visible as some of the new groups that I have allowed to root and grow here are. Many members of it have supported you here, and I'm sure many more are silently nodding their heads. To me, you are clearly cared for here.

You are welcome here, and I hope that you feel that. Always feel free to drop me a line to talk if you wish. I'm always happy to see such.

Be well all,
Myriads

 

[Mister Scruff]

I think, seriously... no, seriously folks, I think the most important point we're all missing with the little drama llama into whose anus we have inserted our collective heads, and it's a very important point; all the girls who run around with dummies (binkies?....) and say "PWN" and what have you, they're all in their late teens and early twenties and are gorge.... okay let's not go overboard, but they're all in their late teens and early twenties. Their opinions and trends and behaviours are therefore more important than anyone else's, because let's face it we're a sexual fetish community and these women are at the prime age for sexing with (or failing that, "fapping" over, if you'll excuse my use of internets vernacular).

The more I see the more I start to wonder if this isn't just some attention whore BAWWWing because her spot in the dealership window has been usurped by newer models. lol wut, my friends.


lol wut indeed.

 

[kis123]

I think, seriously... no, seriously folks, I think the most important point we're all missing with the little drama llama into whose anus we have inserted our collective heads, and it's a very important point; all the girls who run around with dummies (binkies?....) and say "PWN" and what have you, they're all in their late teens and early twenties and are gorge.... okay let's not go overboard, but they're all in their late teens and early twenties. Their opinions and trends and behaviours are therefore more important than anyone else's, because let's face it we're a sexual fetish community and these women are at the prime age for sexing with (or failing that, "fapping" over, if you'll excuse my use of internets vernacular).[QUOTE/]

I completely agree! This young generation is probably the most sexually liberal (and I say it in a good way). They know what they want and just go for it

The more I see the more I start to wonder if this isn't just some attention whore BAWWWing because her spot in the dealership window has been usurped by newer models. lol wut, my friends.


lol wut indeed.

Although you're certainly entitled to your opinion, I have to disagree with this assessment. I can't say Helena and I are extremely close, but she's not a trouble-maker or attention whore. I think she just got a little lost in the translation of the forum's present direction and is just trying to find her fit. I wish her well in her future at TMF as well as the newer younger set that definitely put fire in this place for sure!

 

[Adam]

Although you're certainly entitled to your opinion, I have to disagree with this assessment. I can't say Helena and I are extremely close, but she's not a trouble-maker or attention whore. I think she just got a little lost in the translation of the forum's present direction and is just trying to find her fit. I wish her well in her future at TMF as well as the newer younger set that definitely put fire in this place for sure!

Well said. Sometimes I get the impression that there are folks on the site who have little tolerance for those who would offer a dissenting opinion and are awfully quick to get on the defensive. Now by the same token, those who enjoy their binkies and PWNage (personally I don't see the appeal) shouldn't be singled out. Thing is, I really don't think that was Helena's intention at all.

In any case, it's Thanksgiving. I hope everyone is enjoying a nice home-cooked meal and some quality time with family. We can all argue and disagree some more later.

 

[Bugman]

The more I see the more I start to wonder if this isn't just some attention whore BASing because her spot in the dealership window has been usurped by newer models.

You have no idea what you're talking about.That's the last thing Helena is.She also happens to be very intelligent and damn good looking,as well as a good friend.

 

[Amnesiac]

WHOA, WHOA-WHOA WHOA. WHOA.

Okay, I can see where I missed something, and I can see a little more in Helena's attitude in recent posts and now that The Immortal One has posted a magnificent response, I think I can clarify a little more.

Helena's responses and the responses TO them indicate to me that I wasn't exactly wrong about the persecution undercurrents that ticklephiles seem to have. They also indicate that Myriads and his contemporaries are also smack on about the demographic changes in the TMF lately. I need to consult with Venray about this for a BTR show soon.

I. Helena & Paranoia

I can see some of the hostility or vitriol in Helena's voice when she talks about the "infantalizing of women" with the nuks and the sapphic behavior she's seeing on the threads recently: she gets that paranoid itch that most women have that degrading trends are beginning to take hold of their favorite community and exploit/ruin their community. UNDERSTANDABLE FEARS, especially if you are a feminist or have had experience with manipulative group settings.

But it's an UNFOUNDED one. None of the girls in question (Cassi, Euphoricy, Crystal, BrightEyes, Bella), NONE OF THEM ARE PUSHOVERS OR SELL-OUTS. If any of this binky-related "infantalizing" was not their own idea, THEY'D SLAP THE SHIT OUT OF WHOEVER TRIED. As I said before, they get along so well that they themselves turn into instant giggly, squealing, giddy, bouncy, binky-sucking GIRLY GIRLS when they meet each other; when they go back to civilian life, they return to normal. And the binky thing was a party favor joke that Jeff started and the girls adopted it as a bonding thing.

IT'S NOT A BABYDOLL FETISH THING...it's just something that grew out of 2-3 unrelated things. Anybody who suggested that these practices are degrading the girls and making them into something they don't want to be will get the shit kicked out of them BY the girls in question. Hardly the sign of weak, easily manipulated girls.

II. Helena and Sexual Suspicion

Okay, there are 2 things we understand:
1. Lesbianism is VERY popular subject matter for straight men
2. Helena is 100% straight.

Okay, we got it. No one is contesting it or saying that Helena is less desirable because she is 100% heterosexual. The fact is that SOME of the girls in question are bi-sexual or bi-friendly. That does NOT mean they are only liked because of it.

Yes it will draw attention, and yes men will egg it on, and yes the girls like each other so much that they won't let themselves get egged on...BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN BI-GIRLS ARE THE ONLY PREFERENCE.

Mondy is straight. So is Mairead. And yet, they seem to be very well accepted because 1) They like tickling and 2) They have dynamic personalities and 3) They actively interact with people, and 4) THEY ARE FUN-LOVING PEOPLE.

And I would think that the presence of Bella and Skipadeedoodah would PROVE that the TMF attitudes aren't shifting towards the sexist. Bella's tiny and round, and Skippy's a BBW. And yet, when they go to a gathering, are people turning them away and shunning them because of their size or lack of lesbianitis?

No, they're SCREAMING: "BELLA!" & "YAY SKIPPY!" and tickling the living crap out of them. Size and heterosexuality are becoming irrelevant by and large as the gathering communities become more social. It's all about the personality these days.

III. Helena and What Myriads Sed

Both Helena and Myriads commented on the change in demographics on the TMF recently, especially regarding "Then vs. Now". Even Mister Scruff made comments about it that I agree with.

When the TMF formed, the community was largely composed of people who were heavily in the closet. Then, as we realized we all wanted certain things, we started compiling our stuff (video collections, etc.) and got up the courage to expand our activities; I'm sure Max didn't plan on NEST becoming what it is now, but that is an indication of what happens over time.

Eventually, the TMF tweaked, changed, and improved, some for the better and some for the too-regulated-for-some-people's-standards-of-reason, like the stringent rules about minor content; given that the regulations were created by Jeff and Myriads likely in response to issues they directly had to deal with, my guess is they had good reason. But as these changes were made, there was a shift in membership.

Younger members of the digital age joined in, unburdened by the shame and reticence of those of us from the Age of Analog, and joined in with gusto, chatting heavily and bringing themselves and their friendships out in the open. This undoubtedly, as Scruff pointed out, ruffled the feathers of those who cannot relate to such things and now those people, who at one time in the early days felt safe in the company of equally closeted people, now feel left out or stigmatized for not joining in. If I were one of them, I would certainly feel my safe little sanctuary has lost its way and has no more love for my closeted self.

That I think is the primary cause of Helena's reactions and attitudes, but the first part I think is just misinterpretation and the second part too big to deal with here.

 

[BellaRisa]

Wait, whut?

those who enjoy their binkies and PWNage (personally I don't see the appeal) shouldn't be singled out. Thing is, I really don't think that was Helena's intention at all.

The subject line of this thread is "Do you refuse to suck a binky and hate the word PWN?" but you don't think the intention was to single those people out?? Did you type that with a straight face?

 

[Adam]

The subject line of this thread is "Do you refuse to suck a binky and hate the word PWN?" but you don't think the intention was to single those people out?? Did you type that with a straight face?

I think the title of the thread was worded poorly and Helena would probably admit that. An unfortunate misunderstanding. Let's all get along now, pilgrims.

 

[Tortuga]

I've passed over this thread numorous times in the past many days, but today, why I couldn't tell you, today I actually sat down and read it. So here's my opinion, you may take it strongly or not, I'm not one for caring.

Being of the binky sucking individuals, lets be honest here, it's not like we're fucking hiding. And yes Helena, I think you are feeling very left out. Considering that a good majority of you all don't know the story behind the binkys in the first place, I sense a bit of jealousy.

I'm pretty sure MTP Jeff gave CrystalLight and Brighteyes (and maybe Tortuga?) pacifiers that said "Mute Button" on them as a gag gift...and it just progressed from there.

Fortunately, whether or not we have nuks in our mouth doesn't affect anyone else one way or the other ... unless you're kissing us, or something. But you don't have to worry about that apparently ... what with you not getting enough female attention and all.

It was a fucking gag joke. Seriously. Jo, Mondy, and I continue to suck on the binkies not to act like babies, but to pretty much celebrate the fact that it was a joke. Some find it cute, and some don't, who gives a fuck. It isn't a side fetish that we have, we're just doing it to be funny. And it's something that we all have a bond with. Jo, Mondy, and I grew a fantastic friendship in NHLee, we love each other to pieces. The Binkies in my point of view, are just a reminder of the very special weekend we shared together at NHLee. We're team JoMondCas DAMNIT!

Moving along....

Of course the forum isn't what it used to be. I've been apart of the forum for many years not just ask Tortuga but as Enny as well. So I've been around. Yeah in the beginning it was nothing but tickling. Tickling this, tickling that, tickling sideways, whatever. I don't know if anyone has noticed...There's about 80,000 people on this forum, and a good majority of them are the younger crowd. Yes this is an adult forum, but you have to remember, you only have to be 18 to join. I'm not saying this has something to do with maturity level, I think it has something to do with the new wave of humor. SO a couple of us make up and abbreviate words to express what we're feeling, WHO GIVES A FLYING FUCK. If you dont understand it, then ask. If you don't like it, then put your big boy pants on and ignore it. It can't get more simple than that.

Now the brought of word of Spanking by Helena....

I'm not sure if your eyes are open to the fact that tickling isn't the only fetish some people have on the forum. Course you could tell us to go to a spanking forum, but you know what? You can say that...but you better say it to all the Foot Fetish Folk too.

Girl on Girl

Is this new to you? There has been girl on girl for years! are you freakin' kidding me? And like Jo said, you don't have to be bisexual or a lesbian to kiss or grope another girl. We're just attracted to each other, and we show affection toward one another. And if you ever come to a gathering, I think you would definitely be proven as wrong towards the fact, that isn't all that goes on. And it isn't all publicly done. I'm sure many of you have noticed the pic in the Challenge Pictures by Myriads, and I'm grabbing Jo's boobs. We both were doing that in a joking manner, and felt comfortable doing it around a group of friends.

Seriously though, why is it your concern as to what some of us are doing, whether it's on the forum or at a gathering? Your biggest concern should be yourself, and what you enjoy. I really find it hard to believe that you can't find anyone on the forum that would be interested in waht you like, or how you talk, or how you act.

Skippy, Jo, Mondy, Gin, and I....we've all bonded as if we were sisters and seperated at birth.

I'm not liked on this forum because I may on occasion we're pigtailks, or suck on a binky, or say ONNOM or hump, or pwn. I'm liked on this forum for being myself.

Why don't you trying doing the same, instead of concerning yourself with the way others are.

 

[CrystalLight]

I think the title of the thread was worded poorly and Helena would probably admit that. An unfortunate misunderstanding. Let's all get along now, pilgrims.

Explain the content of the thread then, pilgrim.

 

[Adam]

Explain the content of the thread then, pilgrim.

I really don't feel like arguing, so I choose to step away and not get involved anymore. There's more leftovers in the fridge anyway.

 

[BellaRisa]

I think the title of the thread was worded poorly and Helena would probably admit that. An unfortunate misunderstanding. Let's all get along now, pilgrims.

We'll all get along just fine as long we're all being honest and not pussyfooting around the truth

 

[Ticklshchic03]

Helena... it bugs me too but I believe in everyone's right to do whatever. Turn your sigs off.

Crystal, Jeff, Skip... get off the defense fence. She never at any point directly used any of your names. She stated her opinion. Instead of automatically going on a personal rant about why she is "attacking" the forum... try discussing the issue. The second she rebutes, you attack again. Discussing would be a better idea since this is a discussion forum. I support your right to suck on a binki and use pwn. You are so right in that aspect but I respectfully request that there is a better way to discuss something then personally attacking her.


//puts on my fire retardant gear

 

[Skipadeedoodah]

I'm seriously so over this thread. It's just gonna keep going. The same points are gonna be argued over and over and over again. I've made my points, and I'm not repeating them. If anyone is looking for a rebuttal, go read my previous posts, cause that's where it'll be.

 

[CrystalLight]

Brakes.

Myriads and Amnesiac,

This is all well and good that you both feel the desire to perform a clean up and or attempt to justify the real cause of this thread.

Let's be honest. If it was a genuine misunderstanding and misspeak on her part, then a apology to those offended and a request to the Moderators to edit the thread title as WELL as a complete revamp of the initial thread could have happened. Easily.

No. This thread went on, feelings were hurt, people felt (rightfully so) slapped and slammed into. Nothing about the initial thread was productive in providing a conclusive response that she proclaimed she was seeking.

I also find it extremely ironic that Helena happened to be the one to broach this magnitude of a topic. Almost as if an invisible hand was guiding this whole shit storm into place. I don't think Helena is a stupid person, the contents of this thread and what it laid claim to, however, was.

Younger members of the digital age joined in, unburdened by the shame and reticence of those of us from the Age of Analog, and joined in with gusto, chatting heavily and bringing themselves and their friendships out in the open. This undoubtedly, as Scruff pointed out, ruffled the feathers of those who cannot relate to such things and now those people, who at one time in the early days felt safe in the company of equally closeted people, now feel left out or stigmatized for not joining in. If I were one of them, I would certainly feel my safe little sanctuary has lost its way and has no more love for my closeted self.

Demographics. This isn't the first time this topic has been attempted to be used to justify a bigger issue. Being; directly blasting into people for the benefit of one's own pride.

That doesn't have shit to do with this:

I get the feeling that I'm one of the hold outs on the forum that enjoys tickling without sucking on a baby binky, or using the phrase PWN.

Or this:

I'm definitely a heterosexual woman, and I don't live a submissive lifestyle. I'm just a lee. I like tickling with or without bondage. I just love tickling in general.

Or this:

I used to really enjoy the tickling discussion, but since I'm not into the whole group scene, like going to "hump" and "omnomnom" everyone for a weekend grope, all loose and lite-like.

Or this:

or even if it matters to anyone but me. I expect that this will be an unpopular post, and that I am in the minority.

With all that snide shit taken out, you're left with this:

and for the longest time, I've felt the freedom to enjoy this site in so many wonderful ways. I feel perhaps the site has changed enough to no longer meet my needs. I have no idea how other people feel about the shift in culture on the forum

HOLY FUCKING SHIT! THAT LOOKS A LOT LESS BITCHY, DUNNIT?!

Yeah. Because with all the directly negative comments and whiny little proclamations, it is a thread that holds merit and earns itself a more level response.

So, due to the fact that the thread wasn't stated as so or even somewhat LIKE so? Demographics ain't got jackshit to do with this.

That I think is the primary cause of Helena's reactions and attitudes, but the first part I think is just misinterpretation and the second part too big to deal with here.

No.

There is no way that I can sit back and look at the beginning or even the second "attempt" as anything else but what it is. This isn't about Demographics. This isn't about "not being able to hide in the closet anymore."

This is forum politics through and through.

Confined in such a way that it holds minimal potential to be viewed as other.

And crafted in such a way that is also clear to be blatant line walking.

But I think that the core point of your post was this:

"I'm not feeling at home in a place that I once always did. And it makes me feel sad and frustrated to have this happen. Does anyone else feel like I do? What is happening to my web home?"

Where do you see that? I even took the liberty of reposting the initial thread into pieces. So, once you sift past the bullshit finger wagging, is that where you see this supposed claim?

Illuminate Me.

I think the core point of the post was this:

but since I'm not into the whole group scene, like going to "hump" and "omnomnom" everyone for a weekend grope, all loose and lite-like.

And this:

If I'm not into all the latest trends, how dare I ask a question about it.

And this:

Jeff and Bella support and protect any trendy direction towards which these girls would steer the forum, and as you can see in this thread, Jeff will basically growl and snarl at anybody daring to cast aspersions on such trends.

And this:

Bottom line, if we're to be a forum in which ideas are freely expressed, than Helena and others like her ought to be free to express their feelings with administrative intimidation.

And this:

I understand that attacking people on the TMF violates forum policy. I'm a big believer in following the rules, so I consistently refrain from doing this.

And this:

then may I suggest a reiteration of the posted rules for the benefit of those who don't happen to read this particular thread?

Holy hot damn, I could just go on and on!

Face facts. You want to sit here and attempt to bestow some shining light or beacon that makes it all look like it was some silly little misunderstanding? Then she should've taken the responsibility to edit or completely alter her initial post. Then perhaps that assumption could hold merit.

I see this feeling around the forum a lot these days, and spoke to it at length in a past a few days back. I see it as a very real issue, and one that is natural in a community of our nature at this point in it's development. I also feel its a VERY important topic and issue.

Everything about this quoted post would've been simply passed on by as legit if it was the fucking case. Which it's not.

I'm not going to sit here and allow someone to tread all over Myself and My friends' enjoyments and affections toward each other and then watch as some people, yourself included, pull into nothing and bring up bullshit about the changes of the world and the changes of the community.

I'm wagering a guess here. And it's just a stab in the dark, but Helena is older then 5. And has experienced change and growth. This is not something extremely confusing or on the terms of Rocket science.

What you differ in, is how those ends are reached, and that is the root of every single conflict in this thread. You are all defending the forum out of care.

The forum protection line could be true if it was the forum that needed to be defended. No. This is about having to defend what the few of us called out initially enjoy or have fun with. We have to defend our personality.

Justify that.

Strong personalities create divisions by just being. They come to represent groups, and those become factions or cliques. And from there we end up with so many of the things that Helena is feeling in her OP.

Nah. See, it's ironic. We were basically blatantly accused of infantalizing.. and yet, those of us accused aren't pitching a whining bitch fest, pointing fingers and stomping our feet.

We're fucking proactive. We handle ours. We enjoy ourselves. And we're having to sit here and take flack for it. And then sit back and watch as some people flow in with comments of "This is what I perceive she is really saying."
Don't assume. Seriously. Not good at it at all.

And to speak to the small montage of "I think this is what was meant" and "I'm assuming she really meant..", If ANY of those enlightening prophecies were true, don't you think they would've been confirmed by the OP?

Ah. That's right.. they weren't. Now what?

 

[fireguardian]

Just honest curiosity

Maybe this has been explained already but I just have to ak and voice my thoughts.

What is with the binkies? What is a the appeal behind them? How is it viewed as a joke to be handed an infants pacifier with the words mute button on it?

THis is just me trying to understand. My view on it is a very low one not that I have any thing against those who do have them. In fact I am quite fond of Cassie and Gin. They are very sweet girls. But personally I feel that should be handed something like this, regardless of how close a friend I am to the person, that binkie would go right up their ass. I see it as beingvery disrespectful. Don't give me something that say mute button o it; If you don't want to hear what I have to say then all you have to do is walk away. The other thing is while I might be one of theyounger ones in my group of friends at age 23 I am by no means a child nor will I tolerate being put on that level. My life made me grow up very quickly and that's actually something I am proud of so I would honestly be hurt if my friends reduced me to the level of an infant. Frankly, that would be the point I looked for new friends. It would come off as demeaning to me as if my value was less than others. I have my moments of immaturity like anyone else but I still expect to be treated with respect.

Now I am not saying that was how any of this was intended to be. I am sure it was all in good fun. And if those that do it take enjoyment from sucking on binkies have at it, just don't expect me to understand and please do not offer me one. In my mind it portrays a certain image that I can't connect myself to. The cute innocent little girl thing is all well and good for some but in my opinion there are other ways to do that. I will stick with my puppy face and pouts and maye to some that gets the same reaction as I have to the binkies. *shrug* It's all good.

And as for the girl love I can't say that I hate it. It was nice to get so many compliments on my boobs while at Bella's. One perk of being a bigger girl, bigger boobs. (YAY! go me) Yes, they make great pillows. They look even better in my corset, I swear. Sorry I digress. Anyway this has never bothered me. I am in general a touchy feely person whether the person be male or female. If I know you and feel comfortable with you I will hug, pet, kiss, cuddle, and all around love on you. Now if you are not into that it's cool I might have to leash in the impluse but I can. Again I go back to Cassi and Gin, (sorry ladies I can't help it you two are just so sweet) they are two that you can't help but want to cuddle with (even with the binkies). Does this mean I am bi? I frankly have no clue. I have never done more than cuddles and little quick kisses. Am I curious? Maybe a little. Could that have to do with the fact that my main sexual formative years were spent in an all girls school? Very possible. (I even still have the uniform to prove it)

Just wanted to put my two cents in. I hope no one thinks I am acting any one just really was curious.

 

[Soda83pop]

Curiosity got the best of me.

The most "off topics" I have ever seen in a 12 page thread on a message board ever.

And btw:

"Pwn" is a typo of "own" that caught on and has been absorbed into today's bastardization of English popular among eighth graders and certain TMF members. It's one example of many disturbing trends emerging here.

This isnt singling you out dude, because you arent the only one that feels this way. But it REALLY needs to be brought to the surface.

What is referred to now as internet slang (hacker smack) has been around since the goddamn 70's. Every time something catches on here, the people that dont care for it try to give the impression that it was started right here at tmf (see: lol cats, rickrolling, etc.). It wasnt. The fact is, it was around before most of the younger members here were twinkles in their parents eyes, and Im sure there is a nerd in here that is older than me (Im 33) that can confirm this.

For those who are actually interested in learning where these terms come from instead of making blind accusation in frustration, Google ftw.

 

[Tamia78]

Nah. See, it's ironic. We were basically blatantly accused of infantalizing.. and yet, those of us accused aren't pitching a whining bitch fest, pointing fingers and stomping our feet.

No, you're not I agree, but you do egg it on by posting pics of you sucking on a binky and the huge red "PWNED" in your sig that just "happened" to show up less then 24 hours ago. I see both parties making subtle snide comments here.

--T

 

[CrystalLight]

No, you're not I agree, but you do egg it on by posting pics of you sucking on a binky and the huge red "PWNED" in your sig that just "happened" to show up less then 24 hours ago. I see both parties making subtle snide comments here.

--T

There's also images of myself and Amanda sucking nuks floating around forum.

It was absolutely not by happenstance. Instead of calling out via thread like this, I was proactive. I'm proud of Amanda and blessed to have her as my friend. I'm also not ashamed that I've nommed a nuk or used the word PWN.

Defense. The best offense.

 

[fttickler]

Oh My Darlin pookie

Hi Handsome One,
Bwhahahahaha. I'll look forward to the earlobe kiss.
With the place changing all the time, it's nice to know that I can ask questions about different things without a problem. I think communication is important when I'm trying to understand new things.

I have missed you. Now one would think for all the time I have been here and what I do for a living I would know the answer to this but I do not so I have to ask. what is or does "PWN" mean?

And I have not read about anyone with a binky. Binky as I know it means 2 different thingy to 2 different groups. One refers to a childs blanket andone refers to a pacifier. I assume in this case pacifier is correct but again.. did not know it applied here.

Miss ya pookie

Adam

 

[Homer28]

There's also images of myself and Amanda sucking nuks floating around forum.

It was absolutely not by happenstance. Instead of calling out via thread like this, I was proactive. I'm proud of Amanda and blessed to have her as my friend. I'm also not ashamed that I've nommed a nuk or used the word PWN.

Defense. The best offense.

Okay, I have tried to keep my anger down and not explode but now I find myself unable to. I want to make it clear that they are not nuks.. they are BINKYS!!!!!!!!!!

There, I feel better now

 

[CrystalLight]

Okay, I have tried to keep my anger down and not explode but now I find myself unable to. I want to make it clear that they are not nuks.. they are BINKYS!!!!!!!!!!

There, I feel better now

 

[drew70]

I feel for Helena. I really do. I know what it's like to voice an opinion about a specific behavior and then watch the herd of arrogant self-righteous line up one by one and take their shot.

Here's something I have difficulty rationalizing. The binky kids' arguments basically amount to, "hey, if we like binkies, pigtails and baby talk, we should be able to do so without being flamed about it."

I actually agree with this. You should. But you're unwilling to grant that same consideration to those of us who think this trend is disturbing, weird, or even downright retarded. You treat it as a personal attack, but in reality it isn't. It's attacking a behavior or a trend, not a person.

Allow me to illustrate with a hypothetical. TMF member Ticklebabe27 loves wearing a binky at gatherings, speaks lolcat broken English in many of her posts. Tickledude64 sees this trend of lolcat talk and Binkies gaining momentum. There's any number of public ways he could react, but here are three possibilities:

Scenario 1 - Tickledude64 posts, "Have you seen the way Ticklebabe27 speaks all that lolcat? Jesus, what a retard!"

This would be a textbook TMF GR violation, because he attacks another member specifically.

Scenario 2 - Tickledude64 posts, "I'm hear to tell you, anybody who speaks lolcat is a freakin retard in my book."

This is borderline. He doesn't name anybody specific, but speaks in a more general sense. Still, the attack is against people, and so could be interpreted as a violation if one really wanted to.

Scenario 3 - Tickledude64 posts, "I think that speaking lolcat is a pretty retarded thing to do, as is the wearing of binkies at social gatherings. I really hate this fucked up and disturbing trend."

He's no longer attacking people but attacking specific behaviors. Now Ticklebabe64 might think, "ZOMG!! I IS BEEN ATTAKT!" But she's not. She's taking it personally because she has <em>chosen</em> to identify with this behavior.

"But drew," you say. "If he's attacking the behavior, and everybody knows she behaves this way, that's just as bad as attacking HER!"

No, it isn't. He's attacking a specific action or activity, not the person doing it. You can love a person but hate some of the things they do. Because what they do is seldom reflective of WHO THEY ARE, most certainly not in the case of lolcat baby talk and pacifier sucking. If her feelings get hurt from what he said, it's because she connected that particular activity to herself as a person. She made the connection, not he.

When one publicizes his/her participation in any strange behavior, there will be people who think it's cool and others who think it isn't. If you're acting weird in public way, you can't reasonably expect everybody be on board with it. It is equally unreasonable to expect those who think it's funny, strange, weird or disturbing to keep quiet about their feelings. Sorry guys, but society is just not that accommodating.

To the best of my knowledge, the TMF's ruleset forbids the attacking of other TMF members, but makes no mention of attacking behavioral trends. Once again, if this is not the case, I invite the mods and admins to clarify.
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[TMF Jeff]

To the best of my knowledge, the TMF's ruleset forbids the attacking of other TMF members, but makes no mention of attacking behavioral trends. Once again, if this is not the case, I invite the mods and admins to clarify.

What makes you think anyone is saying Helena broke a rule? Is it possible that you're talking about something else entirely and trying to pretend that you're not?

 

[Mister Scruff]

Although you're certainly entitled to your opinion, I have to disagree with this assessment. I can't say Helena and I are extremely close, but she's not a trouble-maker

I'd be inclined to agree.

or attention whore.

You don't have to be a trouble-maker to be an attention whore. You just have to have a desire to have your ego constantly stroked.

You have no idea what you're talking about.That's the last thing Helena is.She also happens to be very intelligent and damn good looking,as well as a good friend.

She may well be all those things. Quite frankly I don't ever recall saying she wasn't. You don't have to be ugly or imbecilic to have low self-esteem and require constant reassurance in the form of impersonal jabberings.

//puts on my fire retardant gear

Sexeh

The forum protection line could be true if it was the forum that needed to be defended. No. This is about having to defend what the few of us called out initially enjoy or have fun with. We have to defend our personality.

Justify that.

It's called "human society"; if you do something, people are going to judge you for it. People will always try to shit on you for who you are or how you behave; the thing is, though, you don't HAVE to defend yourself against such pissing and whinging. Doing so only makes people more likely to continue pissing and whinging at you in the future, because they know they'll get a rise out of you and, let's face it, in a lot of cases that's all they're after.

My advice to you would be to leave this sort of shit alone in future. Let it fester and die in the corner, leave the detractors to their hugboxes, and just rise above it. You probably won't take this advice because you're a belligerent little shit and I honestly think you like the drama as much as other people like causing it, and that's fine by me. Crabsnatch likes the drama too; the more dramatic the better.

In fact ignore my fucking advice; this place is unhealthily sanitised and "flame-free" enough as it is. Stir moar drama.