Girlfriend not into Tickle videos?

[c7_assassin]

Well said. This is like someone owning a Porsche and being upset that there's a scratch on the fender.

Actually this is more like someone owning a Porsche, and then your girlfriend wants you to turn it in because the seats are leather and leather is murder. Yes, technically you could do it, but you're just staving off the moment when the crazy spills over into your life in some other way.

Why does she get to demand so much of you? If you asked her to stop seeing her friends because you were jealous of her attention, no one would hesitate to call you an asshole. So how can she have the right to control what's going on in your head?

EDIT:

Hey Guys and Girls,

Sorry, I haven't had a chance to be on all day. I just got through reading everyone's posts. THANKYOU so much for responding. I tend to agree with everyone on some part of their post.

I agree that I should be sensitive to her feelings, and she does mean the world to me. We dated about 2 years ago and just started dating again back in October. We talk about marriage and what our lives would have been like if we stayed together through the past two years. I think the people that said "she is sensitive because she wants to be enough for me" are right. I think that is how she feels too. She wants to fully satisfy my fetish, which she totally does. Not everyday do you find a girl who actually calls me up and tells me she loves me, then says come over so I can tie you up and rub my socks in your face. She knows I like it and probably just wants to make sure that she is satisfying me.

However, I also agree that it isn't really a problem until we get further along. Even though we talk about the future, things can always happen and I can keep them locked up on an external hard drive. She wants to watch them with me so I will let her.

Thanks everyone and you have been very helpful!

I wish you the best of luck, and I hope you're able to accommodate each other's needs. I just hope it's an equal trade-off. 🙂

 

[proud2tickle]

magic that was to funny the couldnt resist line

 

[Libertine]

...if I got to tickle someone on a regular basis that I'm attracted to, I probably wouldn't watch tickle videos.

'If' and 'probably'.

You admit you don't know, because it's never happened. Let us know how you feel when you've had a few relationships with girls willing to accommodate your desires, and you have the confidence to know you can find others without too much trouble. Sorry if I sound cold, but I was in your shoes once and as girlfriends come and go over the years you'll not only find the skills, but have a past you can look back on fondly. You'll also know when a proper 'keeper' comes along, with whom you have more in common in addition to a simple shared fetish.

I don't watch vids (unless out of curiosity if someone I've actually met IRL's appearing) because having appeared in a few and knowing people from that world I know how unerotic they are to make. But the gent in question's not doing anything wrong by having a look, and his girlfriend's wrong to try and control his behaviour. 'Looking' to a man is vital- that's how we're wired, women know it, and that's why makeup and the fashion industry exist.

Even if a guy's being fed steak, he still might like to look at a picture of lambchops now and again, even if he will never have them for dinner. Women who worry about their significant others watching a video once in a while should remember that it's very possible to look at the beautiful pictures in an art gallery without having the slightest desire to own them.

 

[Soda Bobinski]

In other words , folks :

Dames ... who can figger 'em?

 

[Simm]

^^^ pretty much what my contribution was going to be...

 

[TheTickleMonster]

'If' and 'probably'.

You admit you don't know, because it's never happened.

Actually, I said that because i've been single for a while and can't remember if I watched Tickle Videos wihle with my girlfriend's I've had in the past.

However what I do know is that if I wasn't single right now and she found out that i had a tickle fetish and was willing to to indulge my fetish and she asked me to stop watching those videos, I'd do it. I don't need to watch tickle videos. I watch them as an attempt to fill the void since I don't get much tickling action these days... And it's about respecting her wishes... it's not like she absolutely refuses to indulge him in his fetish but still doesn't want him to watch those videos...

 

[rhiannon]

And it's about respecting her wishes...

What if her wish was that you never talk to another woman again?

 

[COOLCAT88]

Alright so I turn to the forum for help. My girlfriend and I are serious and she knows that I have a tickling fetish as well as a bondage and sock fetish. We do our own tickling sessions and everything else. She is into it and everything. No need to explain that.

My problem is, my girlfriend is angry that I watch tickle videos that I buy from clips4sale. She says that it is very wrong and makes her feel like I am into the girls that are being tickled and doing the tickling. I explained to her the same fact about porn and how it is not the people but the actions that you watch. I explained to her also that I have many tickling videos that I bought over the years, and that I would love watching them just for my personal pleasure.

She took great offense for that and was very upset. She asked me if she can watch them with me and I agreed that it would be NO problem at all. Obviously if I'm in the privacy of my own house when she is at work, I would watch them still. But has anyone ever heard of this issue with their girlfriend or boyfriend? Thanks so much for your help!

Okay, so I have read all 3 pages, and here is my opinion..

You have a girlfriend. She is aware that you have a tickling/sock/bondage fetish, and so you and her hold sessions. She is into it as well. I'm sure many of the guys wish they were as lucky as you, to find a girlfriend/wife who not only knows about our fetishes, but actually lets us engage in them. I know I wish that every day..Now her problem seems to be stemming from the fact that you are watching tickling videos that you have bought over the years and clips4sale, and she doesn't like that. Which leads me to the conclusion:

Why continue to watch the videos? If you have a girlfriend that encourages your fetish and even indulges in it for you, then why watch a video of said fetish if you have the real thing? I think your girlfriend may feel that she's not doing enough to satisfy you...

Or maybe it could be that you watch the videos maybe once or twice, and she's blowing it all out of proportion. In that case, I would sit her down and have some sort of talk and say that you're absolutely not into the people within the videos, but just the acts..

 

[BellaRisa]

Why continue to watch the videos? If you have a girlfriend that encourages your fetish and even indulges in it for you, then why watch a video of said fetish if you have the real thing? I think your girlfriend may feel that she's not doing enough to satisfy you...I would sit her down and have some sort of talk and say that you're absolutely not into the people within the videos, but just the acts..

A talk definitely needs to happen. I've rarely seen a relationship last where one was so insecure/jealous/self-involved that they couldn't handle their partner enjoying the fantasy of erotica (porn, whatever you want to call it) now and again. Sexuality is a complex thing, and very often what one enjoys mentally for one's 'private time' is world's different from what we enjoy with our partners. Having someone indulge you beautifully in real life is wonderful, but a desire for a bit of visual variety is just human; to expect to be the only one your partner ever thinks about sexually is folly and the cause of many, many needless hurt feelings and arguments. Hell, I'm ridiculously satisfied regarding my kinks; doesn't mean I don't enjoy a good fetish video or story online (you'll never get my Aragorn/Legolas/Boromir slash away from me 😉 ) I'm all for being respectful and indulging only when you're alone, but if a partner is freaked out and worried and comparing his or herself to the video folks they need to grow up and learn to love themselves. That's about them, not some stranger on a 5 minute clip.

 

[Cavum]

I've rarely seen a relationship last where one was so insecure/jealous/self-involved that they couldn't handle their partner enjoying the fantasy of erotica (porn, whatever you want to call it) now and again.

^This!

 

[rhiannon]

Why continue to watch the videos? If you have a girlfriend that encourages your fetish and even indulges in it for you, then why watch a video of said fetish if you have the real thing?

Because, as it was said before, one has nothing to do with the other! It's like saying "So if you are in a sexual relationship, why do you still masturbate?" (Ok, true, I've seen people freak out about that as well!)

I think your girlfriend may feel that she's not doing enough to satisfy you...

Then maybe it's time for her to learn that she's wrong instead of him stopping to watch tickling clips! 🙂

 

[proud2tickle]

i disagree i dont think its a matter of her being wrong as much as its an insecurity of hers you cant break her on it she will either just be come comfortable or never be accepting of it. play to her needs, its not all about you its about trying to make the other person happy cause they make you happy.

 

[TheTickleMonster]

What if her wish was that you never talk to another woman again?

uh, I think there's a big difference between telling your boyfriend/husband to never talk to another girl again and telling him not to watch sexual videos that involve his fetish that turn him on again when he has her.

 

[proud2tickle]

wow someone delete this thread i agree with steve again....

 

[TheTickleMonster]

Bassically it comes down to this. Stop being selfish. I know that alot of people on here seem to think the girl is wrong for telling you to stop watching them. And I think that's bull. I'm sorry, but it is. There is nothing wrong with her telling him to stop watching them. They are in a relationship but he sneaks off to watch this feish videos, um no. ure alot of people might be okay with it, but not everyone. Sorry not everyone is like you. And there's nothing wrong with that. She doesn't have a tickle fetish, she just indulges him in his fetish because she cares about him. She doesn't understand that he get turned on by tickling and it really has nothing to do with the girls. In her eyes she sees her boyfriend getting turned on by some girl on girl action or guy on girl action or whatever when you should be tickling her and getting action from her instead of some computer screen. Real life action. The way I see it is you're thinking about what you want and not considering what she wants, which is why I called you selfish. You want to watch your videos so you think she's wrong and want to keep watching them. Did you even consider her feelings and/or why she wants you to stop?

I know this tread has been around a while so you probably solved your problem so my rant is probably more for the other people replying to here that don't seem to even be thinking about it from her point of view, just from their own point of view of peple with this fetish that don't want to give up their videos...

But I'll continue... Here are your options as I see it...

One, talk to her to try to convince her she's still the girl for you even though you watch videos so she'll be okay with you watching them.

Two, dump her because your'e too selfish to consider her feelings and watch those videos no matter what she wants

Three, be happy with your real life tickle toy and stop watching your videos until you break up and tickle her as often as possibl... possibly getting her to wear different clothes to be tickled in so you don't get bored with one tickle toy so she looks somewhat different when you tickle her

 

[asutickler]

I'd think long and hard about whether or not you want to allow someone else to tell you what you can and can't do. That's an awful slippery slope.

Just my two cents. 🙂

 

[TheTickleMonster]

I'd think long and hard about whether or not you want to allow someone else to tell you what you can and can't do. That's an awful slippery slope.

Just my two cents. 🙂

I think she's well within her rights to ask him to stop watching his tickle videos since he has a tickle fetish. It turns him on. I think it's okay for her t ask him to stop

She's not asking him to stop being friends with anyone. To murder someone. To stop getting on here intirely. She's asking him to stop doing or watching something he gets turned on by that's not her.

 

[asutickler]

I think she's well within her rights to ask him to stop watching his tickle videos since he has a tickle fetish. It turns him on. I think it's okay for her t ask him to stop

To ask? Sure. He's also well within his rights to say "no." That's what I'd do in his situation. To each their own, ya know?

She's not asking him to stop being friends with anyone. To murder someone. To stop getting on here intirely. She's asking him to stop doing or watching something he gets turned on by that's not her.

Yes, and in so doing she's asking him to modify his behavior to suit her needs. Like I said, it's a slippery slope... If she manages to do it once, who knows what she'll demand next time?

Also the whole "I don't want you to get turned on by ANYTHING BUT ME" thing is a little bit unnerving, now that I think about it. And by "unnerving," I mean "potentially the first step down the path to Psycho-ville."

 

[fonzieluck]

To ask? Sure. He's also well within his rights to say "no." That's what I'd do in his situation. To each their own, ya know?




Yes, and in so doing she's asking him to modify his behavior to suit her needs. Like I said, it's a slippery slope... If she manages to do it once, who knows what she'll demand next time?

Also the whole "I don't want you to get turned on by ANYTHING BUT ME" thing is a little bit unnerving, now that I think about it. And by "unnerving," I mean "potentially the first step down the path to Psycho-ville."

I agree. However, I have told her that I will only watch them with her. As far as me being selfish, it doesn't have to do with me wanting pleasure from other people. It's the same thing as watching porn in my eyes, (which she does do). I have no problem with that at all.

 

[TheTickleMonster]

I agree. However, I have told her that I will only watch them with her. As far as me being selfish, it doesn't have to do with me wanting pleasure from other people. It's the same thing as watching porn in my eyes, (which she does do). I have no problem with that at all.

oh, well i think you left that part out... if she watches porn then she should be okay with you watching tickle videos, that's kind of hypocritical.... watching porn but saying you can't...

 

[ticklechambers]

Personally i don't have a problem with my boyfriend watching porn. But everyone is different.

You just need to talk to her about it and get to the bottom of it. There could be many reasons she reacted the way she did. But you'll never know how to react to her if you aren't aware of her motivations.

Ask her if it makes her feel insecure? Or if she finds porn to be disgusting? Or if she's had problems involving a guy watching porn before.... etc.

If the issue is that she is worried you prefer the girls in the videos instead of her, then you need to make these points clear to her:

1. you love/want/need her.
2. But for you, watching porn is a separate matter to what you have with her. This is because it is a personal activity you enjoy on your own. It is something you do for yourself.
3. Any needs you have that go beyond personal activities that you do alone, you share with her and her alone. This is because she satisfies your needs for desiring other people.
4. If this relationship is going to work, then she needs to trust you when you claim that porn is not something she should be intimidated/ insecure about. She does not ever need to question this, because as you stated, porn satisfies something very separate to your needs/desires in a relationship.

I suggest you make a few romantic gestures to back up what you're about to say as well. It puts her in a more agreeable mood, and makes the conversation easier to digest.

I think that respect in this situation goes both ways. Respect her feelings, and ask her to respect yours. You shouldn't change each other within the relationship unless either of you want to change yourselves.

 

[TickVix]

I think she should be glad that you even told her about how you enjoy watching tickling vids and wanted to share that with her. It's not like you were hiding i from her. In my opinion it's important to other stimuli (as long as it's not another person) to help keep things lively within the realm of intimacy. I'm sure the videos were there before her, and they will probably be there after her. So it really doesn't benefit her to be insecure about you watching them since I mean she's the one your with and love. Hopefully in due time she'll understand that and it won't get to her as much. Who knows? maybe seh'll even watch a few with you 🙂

 

[rhiannon]

uh, I think there's a big difference between telling your boyfriend/husband to never talk to another girl again and telling him not to watch sexual videos that involve his fetish that turn him on again when he has her.

And what if she starts believing him looking at random strangers or talking to an attractive woman turns him on too? You see where this could lead?

I know a guy who wanted his girlfriend to quit her job at a place that rented out DVDs because attractive guys came in there!

You need to draw the line early with senseless insecurities of your partner!

 

[Soda Bobinski]

I think she's well within her rights to ask him to stop watching his tickle videos since he has a tickle fetish. It turns him on. I think it's okay for her t ask him to stop

She's not asking him to stop being friends with anyone. To murder someone. To stop getting on here intirely. She's asking him to stop doing or watching something he gets turned on by that's not her.

Should he refrain from reading any tickle-stories in the Post Stories section , as well?

 

[COOLCAT88]

Personally i don't have a problem with my boyfriend watching porn. But everyone is different.

You just need to talk to her about it and get to the bottom of it. There could be many reasons she reacted the way she did. But you'll never know how to react to her if you aren't aware of her motivations.

Ask her if it makes her feel insecure? Or if she finds porn to be disgusting? Or if she's had problems involving a guy watching porn before.... etc.

If the issue is that she is worried you prefer the girls in the videos instead of her, then you need to make these points clear to her:

1. you love/want/need her.
2. But for you, watching porn is a separate matter to what you have with her. This is because it is a personal activity you enjoy on your own. It is something you do for yourself.
3. Any needs you have that go beyond personal activities that you do alone, you share with her and her alone. This is because she satisfies your needs for desiring other people.
4. If this relationship is going to work, then she needs to trust you when you claim that porn is not something she should be intimidated/ insecure about. She does not ever need to question this, because as you stated, porn satisfies something very separate to your needs/desires in a relationship.

I suggest you make a few romantic gestures to back up what you're about to say as well. It puts her in a more agreeable mood, and makes the conversation easier to digest.

I think that respect in this situation goes both ways. Respect her feelings, and ask her to respect yours. You shouldn't change each other within the relationship unless either of you want to change yourselves.

I think this is the best response.