wow...lol...I simply cannot not respond to this thread. First, I would like to say that I agree with those of you (I am way too unmotivated to scroll and name names unless that becomes necessary)...lol...who both question what the problem is with creating / using multiple identities and those of you who agree that no harm is done "simply from the act of " creating or using different identities.
Being a behaviorist, I find it interesting, as always, that whenever you mix human beings and verbal expression there are bound to be many different interpretations of what the speaker or originator of the conversation in fact "meant".
That said... The same idea can be applied to an "act".
Sadly, in this world we are judged by what we do, not who we are. Our words and actions are judged by what people need to hear and see them for, not always what we intended.
The basis many people rely upon to make those judgements is unreliable. We are human beings, totally imperfect and as much as we believe we "know another person" or "know human behavior" we will never completely know what that person intended by relying solely (my foot reference...lol) on our own interpretation
On what then, you may ask, can we rely to make that judgement so that it is fair and accurate? I don't know much but I do know that in the absence of any hard data we must rely upon the person that said the statement or committed the act to interpret best what he or she intended by it. The source of the act is the only credible witness to what was intended.
Now, continuing my self-appointed role of mediator and junior investigator...(hey, it's my one chance at role-reversal tonight...lol)
I say that since we have no factual data that I am aware of revealing the validity of what Foottickler1769 says his intentions were in creating and using multiple identities, don't we have to simply believe him when he tells us what "he" intended when "he " created them?
My point is, there are those of you here that have insinuated through your postings in this thread, that there are many possible reasons why he or others may or may not invent and use alternate names here...Those ideas are neither right nor wrong, but they are just that...ideas.
In this case specifically, we have a real person and a real scenario with which to work. We simply have to rely upon what he tells us about what he meant, since he is the only one who truly knows the truth about it.
Sure, we can speculate and guess and judge and project any number of reasons why someone might do this, or those of you that know him (I do not) can even guess about why "he" did this. I think we don't really have the right or better yet, the expertise to do that.
I think this entire thread was blown out of proportion for personal gain. (Some of you will want to throw things at me for saying this...make it shoes please...lol) but I honestly see more anger about his post than makes sense to me. If I am missing something about how this act by him should anger us please someone fill me in.
Seems to me that there is only one other person who has a right to be angry about this and I have not seen her post here as of yet.
For those of you that are so angry about what has transpired here, you might want to ask yourselves why that is. I don't need to know, but I am betting that each of you do or will at some point in your lives. See, I believe that the way we respond to others has more to say about who we are than how we are responded to by others.
Before this becomes an anyone vs. ticklemmmeeeeeee attack, I am stating an observation not setting the stage for an argument....that said, bring it....j/k, I argue not 🙂
Now that I have explained what I am about to post...lol...I will say this.... and then go away....I know, oh yay!...lol.
I agree with the possible reasons a member might create an alternate identity...obviously, I see as any rationally thinking person would, that this act can be one intended for good or bad reasons.
I read what foottickler1769 wrote and he never said he intended to mislead anyone or bring harm, pain or discomfort to anyone. As a matter of fact he specifically stated that he did not intend that. So who are we to tell him that he did?...
I think when anyone types or posts anything, that post can be interpreted many ways, as I stated above, ad nauseum...lol.
Therefore, I feel it is tragic that Foottickler1769 posted an apology and an explanation (what he stated he thought ticklygirl wanted for him to do) and was met with such judgement and hostility from some of you. I think it is so sad when some people use anothers post as a way to make a case for themselves to be cool or popular or right. Before I am bashed for that,lol...(I always expect the worst don't I?...lol)
I won't lie , I have a few people in mind but it is not for me to judge their intentions by their angry or adverse posts....I will allow them to state if they wish (which I am guessing they might...lol) what their intentions were.
Or they can in fact choose not to, I am not looking for a response. I simply wish to post a response to Foottickler1769, someone who made an honest effort to make an assumed-wrong a right and was met with judement and hostility rather than a positive feedback that may encourage his feeling confident by doing this again in the future....I know at least one of you made a similar remark and I agree...being a behaviorist I know too well that behavior that is responded to favorably has a greater likelihood of repeating itself.
aahhh...the power of positive reinforcement. No secret right?
Most intelligent people know this, it doesn't take a behaviorist or rocket scientist to figure it out. So then why do we judge so harshly? Think about it.
I will tell you all right now, that I myself have had alternate names, (I know, "shock! Horror!...lol) Many different names in fact, here and across various parts of the net at any given time over the last 7 years.
At least one of you insinuated that doing this indicates you are "becoming someone else".
I find that an absurd remark. I do not believe it is even possible , from a human behavior standpoint to "become someone else" whether it be online or in person. We are not one - dimensional creatures, we possess many facets of who we are that make up everything that we are.
If we have three screen names and never lie or deceive anyone about who we are but choose different interests or ideas to explore with certain communities, how is that deceitful? I will follow that by reiterating what someone here aslo mentioned and say that once a bond of any kind is established with another individual you MUST be honest with THAT person or else it is deceitful. Is that a law? Not atall, but it is one I choose to live by.
In that case, along those lines of thinking....I wonder if those of you that have judged so harshly talk about everything at work or school or other communities what you discuss here ?
I would guess not. Does that make you deceitful or intending to hurt anyone or "becoming someone else" In a word, no. Am I an expert in anything? Of course not but I do think that he who casts the first stone.....(I'm not being dramatic by the dots...I honestly forget that scripture...and my bible is waaaay out there...lol)
I am not saying a person cannot "show" various, even seemingly conflicting parts of him or herself, but I know from personal experience that there have been different stages in my life, especially regarding my coming to understand my interest in tickling and various fetishes, and simply growing up...lol...that I wanted to break free from my friends possible judgement for a bit and explore how I would be responded to by revealing this new and unexplored part of myself without risking being judged by those who know me when I obviously have a stake in what they think of me. (okay, golden globe AND pulitzer for run on sentence of the century...lol)
I have an alternate name on this forum right now...lol. I have never posed as anyone else nor would I ever deny any of my other identities if asked. As a matter of fact I have been asked recently and I told that person the truth immediately and we laughed about it.
Of course, I have never used another screen name to mislead or be dishonest with anyone, I would never do that, it's just not the kind of person I am. Besides, I can't hide online for some reason...lol. People always know who I am...lol. (rats, foiled again...lol)
I will stop typing now...much to the delight of some...lol...all that I wanted to say is that I would like to tell Foottickler1769 that I am proud of him for having the fortitude to come forward and say what has transpired here...I say we all use this as an example to come forward and admit our alternate identities....lol...(sounding much like a 12 step guru...lol)
Yes, my name is margie and ticklemmmeeeeeee is my problem....lol...btw, the other name I used recently is Goethegrrrl...I was chicken to post my first fiction story...ack!...lol.
Footickler, you know what you did and didn't and intended and not, go with that because when it is all said and done all we really have is ourselves, people will believe what they need to and forgive what they choose to.....every adverse opinion doesn't always say something bad about you, even though it may be expressed to you.
It sometimes says more about the writer.
Be well and good luck with ticklygirl forgiving you, I hope that she can and will.
Anyway, someone much more brilliant and entirely more important than I , says it best.
Matthew 7:1 Do not judge, lest you be judged.
peace.
(Now let's go get tickled!!!!!...lol)
😀
