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Man Moments.

Hmmm...

I have made a can of soda explode by squeezing it really hard.

I have ignored an abscessed molar to the point of excruciating pain and a nigh-lethal infection because I figured it would eventually go away on its own.

I broke another guy's leg playing football.

I'm late for EVERYTHING.

I can catch you a fish, clean it, and make it into a delicious meal right there on the shore.

I can drink a fifth of whiskey in one sitting.

I don't throw away underwear. When it is their time to depart this earth, they disintegrate in the wash as nature intended.

I lost more then a hundred pounds over the course of a few months by forcing myself to work out like a motherfucker and eat nothing but protein. A few years later I had gained it all back, so I did it all over again.

I've gone ice fishing in shorts and a t-shirt.

I've made a grown man hurl by hitting him in the stomach.

I have lived in my apartment for nearly three years. In that time I have turned the stove on twice.

I grew up out in the woods, and I have probably urinated on more trees than anyone else you know.

I have gone for 78 hours straight without sleeping. I only gave in because I started to hallucinate a bit.

I have more chest hair than certain species of gorilla.


...Best thread EVER. 😀
 
I've had my face split open by a stick during a hockey game, and played in another the very next day.

I've also played an entire game with a gashed leg - just wrapped some tape around it afterward and went right back out.

I've eaten rattlesnake - and barbecued rat.
 
I've had kidney stones.

I've done time in Iraq, and drank nothing but hot, black coffee in 120 degree weather the entire time I was out there, never washing the cup.

From 500 yards away, I've shot 5.56 rounds out of an M-16A2, and nailed ten headshots on a target.

From 5 1/2 inches away, I've shot my seed into my wife, and nailed a dead-center egg-shot, creating the ultimate in genetics. :spermey:

Everyday, I physically hold millions of dollars in cash, and I safely transport it to who it needs to go to, and I've never once been tempted to steal it.

With no instruction or carpentry experience, I built a sturdy workbench with nothing but an idea of how it should look, and some wood.
 
Oh my, you men sure are manly. It makes my heart flutter just reading all the manly things you've done. :faint:

🙄

It's a good thing guys can't give birth. You'd make that into some kind of competition. :blaugh: 😛
 
ticklingnemesis said:
It's a good thing guys can't give birth. You'd make that into some kind of competition. :blaugh: 😛
Click to expand...

Oh, I SO would! First off, I'll tell ya that men would do it differently. We wouldn't keep a child below our stomachs. That's just asking for back injuries! We'd store the fetus in our backs, like we were carrying a pack around for nine months. That would allow us to keep our front clear, so that we could keep doing most tasks with our hands up until the very end. When it's time for delivery, we'd have another man cut the baby out for us, with a KA-BAR, and no anesthetic. In fact, the birth would probably occur while we were working on something, so that we could multitask! 😀

--Ya know, come to think of it, nine months is TOO LONG. We'd ingest all forms of protein and supplements to make sure the child could develop and be born faster. We'd knock out childbirth in about... 5 months, maybe 6, tops. 😉
 
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Snail Shell said:
I've turned down a booty call during the NHL post-season.
Click to expand...

Hahaha... this! Though its been a few years since my team was in the post-season, so not so much since then 😀

"I have lived in my apartment for nearly three years. In that time I have turned the stove on twice." asutickler

And this! Classic, lol 😀

*Addendum

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Last edited:
Flatfoot said:
Oh, I SO would! First off, I'll tell ya that men would do it differently. We wouldn't keep a child below our stomachs. That's just asking for back injuries! We'd store the fetus in our backs, like we were carrying a pack around for nine months. That would allow us to keep our front clear, so that we could keep doing most tasks with our hands up until the very end. When it's time for delivery, we'd have another man cut the baby out for us, with a KA-BAR, and no anesthetic. In fact, the birth would probably occur while we were working on something, so that we could multitask! 😀

--Ya know, come to think of it, nine months is TOO LONG. We'd ingest all forms of protein and supplements to make sure the child could develop and be born faster. We'd knock out childbirth in about... 5 months, maybe 6, tops. 😉
Click to expand...

:sowrong: 😛
 
Okay my turn I guess....

I have fired a machine gun, got a marksmanship award cause I did it well!!

I have fired a 120mm cannon from an M-1A1 Abrams at an object and blew it all to hell!!

I have taken the back seat controls of a fighter jet (F-15), and even fired a missile during a training flight.

I have had 2 girls I was dating at the same time, show up at the same place on the same night...had them both confront me, and still end the night with both of them as my girlfriends.

I have drank an entire table of men larger than me under the table.

I have invented a drink ( a shot), and it still gets served at a bar I used to frequent, (The Mexican Cannonball...1 part vodka, 1 part tequila, 2 squirts of Tabasco sauce)

I have taken a punch in the face from a man larger than me, and did not fall.

I have slept outside for 3 days....in November....in South Dakota.

I have eaten animals that normally are not.

I have shot and killed a deer....with a crossbow, then help prepare it.

I have taken an elbow to the mouth during a basketball and had a back tooth chipped.

I have cut my own hair.

I'll add some more as I think of a few more...but I had to address this one:

I don't throw away underwear. When it is their time to depart this earth, they disintegrate in the wash as nature intended.
Click to expand...
HELL YEAH PETE!!! I'm with you on this one.

Rob
 
Contributing...

I've sat through the tube-in-the-lung procedure as well - it's called a thoracotomy.

I've stood in a room filled with CS gas without wearing a gasmask.

I've broken a bone and NOT whined about the pain.

I've come from nothing, and now I have lots of nice things.

I've nailed a girl in the rump.

I've eaten two Naga Morich peppers, and DIDN'T get sick afterwards.
 
c7_assassin said:
Men, there are a few moments in our lives when we have to take a step back and say "Goddamn, it's good to be a man. We've done something that most human beings in history wouldn't have been capable of. We've transcended our simple human form by virtue of being awesome and lucky, and goddamn manly."

I'm a little drunk tonight, so you'll excuse my political incorrectness...

But from the Romans, to the Vikings, to the Marines, all men have indulged in our share of manly moments that the fairer sex just wouldn't understand.

We've all had them... At least those of us who are man enough to claim the title.

Let's rattle off a few and feel good about how goddamn manly we really are.

I'll start:

I've eaten raw red meat off the bone.

I've cut metal with fire.

I've fired a machine gun.

I've drank Scotch that was older than myself.

I've slept in a structure of my own creation.

I've cooked up a batch of my own napalm.

I've experienced the pain of laparascopic surgery (that's when they open you from breastbone to pelvis).

And goddamn it all, I'm a better man for it. 😉

Get the idea?

Now you say something...😛
Click to expand...


You're a man, Dude!
 
My testosterone tales...

  • As a UN peacekeeper, I've survived extricating myself from a minefield in the former Yugoslavia (back when that war was still cool).
  • I've lived for six months alone in a cabin in northern Alberta...and was charged by a bear in the process.
  • I've been swarmed by a bunch of drunks while attending to a patient as an EMT...it was kinda like being in a zombie movie.
  • As an OR nurse, 85% of my co-workers are cute female nurses!

Gawd, I love being a MAN!
 
While no I'm not a man by any physiological means, I'm still kinda manly.. dammit .. and here's why:

As a child my favorite toys were my collection of goblins.

I can drop a transmission in a truck in less than an hour using only a walmart tool set a 2x6 and two cinder blocks.

On this same note, I always do my own car repairs

I have blown up a squirrel with a shotgun

I can hold my own in a political conversation/debate without using words like "uhmm" "That old guy".

I too have cut things with fire and am damned fine at braising(sp?) copper lines.

I take great joy in smashing things with hammers

On numerous occasion I have tried to lose myself in the woods but to no avail.. I honestly can't lose myself anywhere unless I'm really monster drunk.

I try to pick up women when I'm drunk too...

I have fixed appliances with duct tape and coat hangers and they WORKED for years afterward.

I am the person a neighbor will call to removed a carcass from their yard/under their house.

I'm an avid fisher person and have no reservations wrestling with a large catfish using nothing but a pair of needle nosed pliers and a hand towel.

My first name is actually the male spelling of an androgynous name which confuses the hell out of utility companies and employers

I once squeezed a sectional sofa in and then later out the door of a small mobile home by myself.

So yes, women can have many man moments too. so there 😛
 
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